I found a new lingere set and thong hidded under his underwares in his drawer.

[stillafool]

4 hours ago, squarewheel6 said:

Every comments here really opens my eyes, I read and reread every messages that you all are telling me. I should have known better based on he have been doing/ treating me. 

He has never loved me, besides keeps saying how much he cares about me. I should have learned that if you care someone, this whole thing won't ever happened. 

I am only a person who truly cares about him and loves him. 

There's a difference between merely caring for someone and being in love with them.  

[squarewheel6]

4 minutes ago, stillafool said:

There's a difference between merely caring for someone and being in love with them.  

He said he had had a bad experience in relationships before he met me. He doesn't want to express the L word too soon. I don't know, I think it's pointless to talk about his love towards me. 

[stillafool]

Just now, squarewheel6 said:

He said he had had a bad experience in relationships before he met me. He doesn't want to express the L word too soon. I don't know, I think it's pointless to talk about his love towards me. 

At his age most everyone has had bad experiences in relationships before going on to date others.  That is just an excuse.  Did you ask him to tell you he loves you?  Why would he say that?

[squarewheel6]

Just now, stillafool said:

At his age most everyone has had bad experiences in relationships before going on to date others.  That is just an excuse.  Did you ask him to tell you he loves you?  Why would he say that?

I don't ask him if he loves me or not. I am the one who expressed that feeling towards him. I don't expect him to say that back to me. I just want to let him know that how I felt about him.  

 

 

[S2B]

The guy has another person’s lingerie in his room - AND he’s chatting with other women!!! He’s NOT committed to you! He likes that you are convenient - but that doesn’t equate to someone respecting you - loving you.

start dating other men who treat you like a top priority!  He’s not that guy!

 

[stillafool]

1 minute ago, squarewheel6 said:

I don't ask him if he loves me or not. I am the one who expressed that feeling towards him. I don't expect him to say that back to me. I just want to let him know that how I felt about him.  

 

 

I understand.  I was asking why he made that comment to you?

[S2B]

Do you expect to go see him this weekend?

if it were me - I’d be busy busy busy…and I wouldn’t respond to any texts from him either.

start looking for a better choice in a man.  This guy looks like a player. 

[S2B]

8 minutes ago, squarewheel6 said:

He said he had had a bad experience in relationships before he met me. He doesn't want to express the L word too soon. I don't know, I think it's pointless to talk about his love towards me. 

And it’s pointless to waste more time with this guy who isn’t treating you right!

[squarewheel6]

4 minutes ago, stillafool said:

I understand.  I was asking why he made that comment to you?

That's what I truly don't know. 

[squarewheel6]

2 minutes ago, S2B said:

And it’s pointless to waste more time with this guy who isn’t treating you right!

I totally understand that. 

[squarewheel6]

4 minutes ago, S2B said:

Do you expect to go see him this weekend?

if it were me - I’d be busy busy busy…and I wouldn’t respond to any texts from him either.

start looking for a better choice in a man.  This guy looks like a player. 

I do not expect to see him this weekend, I have a plan with my girlfriends to take the dogs out together. 

He still keep texting me like nothing happens. 

[stillafool]

1 minute ago, squarewheel6 said:

That's what I truly don't know. 

I think 7 months is long enough to know if you're in love with someone.  If he's talking to another woman too, ,my guess is he is not.

[squarewheel6]

Just now, stillafool said:

I think 7 months is long enough to know if you're in love with someone.  If he's talking to another woman too, ,my guess is he is not.

That's what my friends comment to me as well. I don't think he is in the same page with me. 

[squarewheel6]

10 minutes ago, S2B said:

The guy has another person’s lingerie in his room - AND he’s chatting with other women!!! He’s NOT committed to you! He likes that you are convenient - but that doesn’t equate to someone respecting you - loving you.

start dating other men who treat you like a top priority!  He’s not that guy!

 

Reading all the messages here, really makes me think more about this person that I shouldn't waste more time with him. 

[S2B]

45 minutes ago, squarewheel6 said:

I don't ask him if he loves me or not. I am the one who expressed that feeling towards him. I don't expect him to say that back to me. I just want to let him know that how I felt about him.  

 

 

Can you see that you are the giver - give give give… and he is the taker?

that’s never a healthy balance for any relationship… even a friendship.

[squarewheel6]

14 minutes ago, S2B said:

Can you see that you are the giver - give give give… and he is the taker?

that’s never a healthy balance for any relationship… even a friendship.

I see your point  and I can't disagree with your statement there. I know I am always a giver and have never been a taker. This causes people take advantage of me. 

Edited August 16, 2022 by squarewheel6

[S2B]

2 hours ago, squarewheel6 said:

I see your point  and I can't disagree with your statement there. I know I am always a giver and have never been a taker. This causes people take advantage of me. 

I’d work with a professional on boundaries and what healthy boundaries look like.

I think you could also benefit in knowing what good balance looks like for you.

[stillafool]

4 hours ago, S2B said:

Can you see that you are the giver - give give give… and he is the taker?

that’s never a healthy balance for any relationship… even a friendship.

I see that too except I don't see him asking for all of that OP seems to give it to him freely and he too sounds a bit uncomfortable with it.  

[squarewheel6]

2 hours ago, S2B said:

I’d work with a professional on boundaries and what healthy boundaries look like.

I think you could also benefit in knowing what good balance looks like for you.

Thank you so much, you make me see things clearly especially on boundaries in relationships. 

I have to admit that I had never thought about that part until now. I shouldn't offer so much until he feels uncomfortable and he didn't want to say no. 

 

[squarewheel6]

30 minutes ago, stillafool said:

I see that too except I don't see him asking for all of that OP seems to give it to him freely and he too sounds a bit uncomfortable with it.  

It is the bad on my part that I didn't realize it would make him feels uncomfortable with things. I think a part of it that we are  both lack on communication. 

[stillafool]

1 minute ago, squarewheel6 said:

It is the bad on my part that I didn't realize it would make him feels uncomfortable with things. I think a part of it that we are  both lack on communication. 

Why is that?  You said this guy is everything you wanted but now you admit you lack communication.

[S2B]

He HAS communicated. When any guy says they need space - that means you spend too much time at his place. It means he doesn’t want to see you as often. 

[squarewheel6]

Just now, stillafool said:

Why is that?  You said this guy is everything you wanted but now you admit you lack communication.

I was saying that I didn't even care to ask if he wanted me to work around his house or asked him if he would be comfortable with me going there every weekend. He didn't want to say no on what I had been doing around his house. 

[S2B]

I think it is best not to be at any new guys house while he isn’t home. 
 

[squarewheel6]

1 minute ago, S2B said:

I think it is best not to be at any new guys house while he isn’t home. 
 

I should have thought better, and I can't say anything else besides thank you.