Is he serious about me? He barely texts me

[pinkvelvetz]

-We used to talk in beginning and Skype 1 hour daily

-Since his new job, he only texts me 1-4 times a day maybe. Sometimes he goes 2 days without texting 

 

-On his days off, he prefer going out with his new guy friends and partying instead of talk to me 

 

-When I don’t reply back to his text, he gets angry and says insults me 

 

-If I breakup with him or just suggest to be friends with benefits, he’s even more angry

 

-He keeps asking me to come live with him forever/be his wife. I already visited him twice and we spent a month together 

 

-We have known each other LDR 10 months 

 

-Last time I visited him I saw a weird article on his computer entitled “How to make her crazy for you by ignoring her”

-I’ve already met his friends. They were very interested in me. One of his friends bought me some purple flowers and kept trying to flirt with me in front of my bf. And my bf didn’t say anything, he just smirked. It was creepy 

-He is from Saudi Arabia and I’m from Florida, however he is working out of his county at a low paying job and struggles

[Alpacalia]

No. He is not serious about you.

He's playing mind games and mistreating you.

The best way to avoid dating parasites is to stay away from them.

Whether you have been with him for a month or a decade, it is the man's responsibility to treat you well, and it is your responsibility to keep choosing the right man every day, regardless of the length of time you've been together.

[NuevoYorko]

Sounds like a big, negative waste of your time.   Move on.  Also, in general, LD relationships are very difficult.  Try to date people who you can actually spend time with, if you want to be in a relationship.

[stillafool]

On 8/9/2022 at 1:37 AM, pinkvelvetz said:

One of his friends bought me some purple flowers and kept trying to flirt with me in front of my bf. And my bf didn’t say anything, he just smirked. It was creepy 

What did you do when the friend brought you those flowers?  Maybe it was a welcoming bouquet and your bf saw it as such.

 

On 8/9/2022 at 1:37 AM, pinkvelvetz said:

He keeps asking me to come live with him forever/be his wife. I already visited him twice and we spent a month together 

If he's asking you all of this why are you worried?  Because he only texts you 4 times a day?

[Wiseman2]

On 8/9/2022 at 1:37 AM, pinkvelvetz said:

He is from Saudi Arabia and I’m from Florida, however he is working out of his county at a low paying job and struggles

You only met once? You need to consider that it was just a fling and that he has a local GF or an arranged marriage scheduled.

[glows]

On 8/8/2022 at 10:37 PM, pinkvelvetz said:

-We used to talk in beginning and Skype 1 hour daily

-Since his new job, he only texts me 1-4 times a day maybe. Sometimes he goes 2 days without texting 

 

-On his days off, he prefer going out with his new guy friends and partying instead of talk to me 

 

-When I don’t reply back to his text, he gets angry and says insults me 

 

-If I breakup with him or just suggest to be friends with benefits, he’s even more angry

 

-He keeps asking me to come live with him forever/be his wife. I already visited him twice and we spent a month together 

 

-We have known each other LDR 10 months 

 

-Last time I visited him I saw a weird article on his computer entitled “How to make her crazy for you by ignoring her”

-I’ve already met his friends. They were very interested in me. One of his friends bought me some purple flowers and kept trying to flirt with me in front of my bf. And my bf didn’t say anything, he just smirked. It was creepy 

-He is from Saudi Arabia and I’m from Florida, however he is working out of his county at a low paying job and struggles

I’m puzzled and trying to understand what you’re seeing in this man because he insults you and seems to treat you like an object.

His friends equally appear to disrespect you and you are a joke for them. “Come live with him forever/be his wife” is a blatant joke, OP. And a mockery. Please don’t be taken in with any guy who invites you to play house. Be forewarned moving to be where he is also effectively isolates you from your support network at home, something abusers are adept at doing. 

[BaileyB]

On 8/9/2022 at 12:37 AM, pinkvelvetz said:

When I don’t reply back to his text, he gets angry and says insults me 

If I breakup with him or just suggest to be friends with benefits, he’s even more angry

This is not acceptable behavior from a man in a relationship. 

On 8/9/2022 at 12:37 AM, pinkvelvetz said:

He keeps asking me to come live with him forever/be his wife.

You don’t know this man well enough to even consider this as a possible option. The fact that he would even suggest this is a HUGE red flag. 

Not to mention the fact that he has demonstrated issues with self control and anger - the potential here for abuse is high. In fact, I would say that he is already demonstrating some controlling and abusive behaviors. I would not advise you to stay in a relationship with this man. 

Edited August 14, 2022 by BaileyB

[chillii]

Sorry op but l agree with Alphy, and the fwb rubbish will only magnify it all , get away from this bs.

[justwhoiam]

"he only texts me 1-4 times a day maybe. Sometimes he goes 2 days without texting" > That's his culture. Women are never too important, the man is.

"On his days off, he prefer going out with his new guy friends and partying instead of talk to me" > See above, you need to understand his culture. If you don't like it or can't accept it, just let him go. There's no way this is gonna work for you. As things won't change after marriage. They'll get worse.

"When I don’t reply back to his text, he gets angry and says insults me" > That says a lot on how he values women. Plus... have you slept with him? In Saudi Arabia a man can't even raise his eyes to look at a woman... so if you had sex with him, that's probably going to speak volumes about your integrity in his eyes. Also, marriages are arranged by groom and bride's family in his country.

"If I breakup with him or just suggest to be friends with benefits, he’s even more angry" > That's totally immoral from his perspective. People should first be informed about the culture of the person they're hanging out with before engaging in anything with them.

"He keeps asking me to come live with him forever/be his wife. I already visited him twice" > That sounds like he can't get into the US. So it's already starting on the wrong foot. He wouldn't have the money to come visit you, he might not get approved to enter your country. And moving to Saudi Arabia doesn't seem like a good idea, unless you want to lose any or all of your rights,

"Last time I visited him I saw a weird article on his computer entitled “How to make her crazy for you by ignoring her” > That's the least of your problems!

"One of his friends bought me some purple flowers and kept trying to flirt with me in front of my bf. And my bf didn’t say anything, he just smirked. It was creepy" He allowed his friends to disrespect you in a strict muslim country such as Saudi Arabia. As if you were an easy Western girl. Totally unacceptable.

"he is working out of his county at a low paying job and struggles" Where is he working? Where did you go when you visited him?

Please be aware that you could be his green card. I really doubt that he's ready to fight with his family to marry a woman they don't know... he's probably already engaged.