Wiseman2 Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 9 hours ago, Austin Austin said: Stop with the "long distance why bother" messages. I like her a lot and I'm going back for Christmas It's difficult to turn a holiday fling into anything, no matter how great it was at the time. Even if she were closer, she doesn't seem that interested. Perhaps you don't mind distance but she seems happy and busy with her local life. Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 13 hours ago, Austin Austin said: And that's the reason why I'm writing this asking you guys for help. What does this mean? Is she playing hard to get or has she lost interest? 😞 PS. Stop with the "long distance why bother" messages. I like her a lot and I'm going back for Christmas which she knows about so with all due respect spare me the talk. I’m sorry you’re frustrated. The truth is there doesn’t seem to be anything there, no relationship at all. This isn’t an ldr. It’s a chat/texting back and forth that’s a bit flirty. To add to my last response earlier in the thread I didn’t even get the sense that she was the least bit romantically interested enough in person to take it that far with you into a dating consistently type of dynamic or a relationship. This is also in line with the way she doesn’t tell you much about her and isn’t interested in sharing too much or speaking with you for long. Maybe you’ll both get friendly and hook up again this Christmas but all of the interactions lack the understanding and mutual respect or depth of anything to do with a relationship. You don’t even understand her or know enough about her life or why she’s treating you this way. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 She just likes your attention, but she's not actually into the idea of being with you. You're wasting your time on her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Austin Austin Posted October 13, 2022 Author Share Posted October 13, 2022 Hi, So yesterday we spoke on the phone and she mentioned she hung out with her boyfriend (I thought since she was seeing me and in contact with me that they broke up but apparently not). So after the phone call ended I figured I don’t want to be an option in this situationship we had, so today I texted her “Hi, I don’t think this thing we’ve got going has any sense. You still have a boyfriend and I’m interested in you more than just a friend, so it’s best if I walk away. If you ever find yourself single then let me know and if I’m still interested we can go from there. Right now I need to end this. Take care” she read it and didn’t respond. Now I feel like I’ve done something wrong, like I should’ve called her instead 😞 Can someone analyze this for me and tell me if I did the right thing or why she hasn’t responded? She’s been online a few times since then. Help me please. Am I the bad guy in this? Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted October 14, 2022 Share Posted October 14, 2022 Already answered on your other thread about this but same answer one more time: No, you did nothing wrong. Boyfriend or no boyfriend, nothing was really happening here anyway. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted October 14, 2022 Share Posted October 14, 2022 About the only thing you've done wrong is to think there's something real going on between the two of you. The message you sent really wasn't necessary, but nor was it harmful. But at least it was honest and nicely worded. I'm guessing that she didn't respond to you because she had nothing to say. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 17, 2022 Share Posted October 17, 2022 On 10/14/2022 at 10:36 PM, basil67 said: I'm guessing that she didn't respond to you because she had nothing to say. I was coming to write the same thing. This wasn't really a dating thing, so it's best that you cease all contact now. It doesn't appear that she wishes to keep in touch, and she obviously mentioned her boyfriend to sent the clear message that she's isn't single and you two aren't going to become an item. You're not the bad guy but you need to better recognize the signals that someone isn't serious about you so you don't waste your time on women like her in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted October 17, 2022 Share Posted October 17, 2022 Did you text her that message in hopes she’d argue with you in a show of affection? That’s fishing on your part if you were looking for a response from her. You don’t need an agreement to end something that isn’t working for you. Step away from this once and for all and leave it alone. Never text someone out of hopes they’ll proclaim something great of your friendship or situation. Say what you mean, mean what you say and goodbye. The advantage you have now is that you’re free to pursue other women and it’s best not keeping this door open. It’s just holding you back. Link to post Share on other sites
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