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Girlfriend's friend emasculates me


Anonymousname21

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Anonymousname21

My girlfriends best friend is always joking with my girlfriend saying things such as she has a bigger dick or my girlfriend will always prefer sex with her. The part that irritates me is that my girlfriend plays along and its constant everytime the 3 of us are together. I am fully aware of how these are just jokes and I shouldn't take it to heart, but regardless of how much I try, the jokes always hurt me. Am I just being jealous or am I right to ask her to stop joking in this way? 

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2 hours ago, Anonymousname21 said:

 my girlfriend will always prefer sex with her. 

How long have you two been dating? How old is she?  Are they in a same sex relationship?

Your GF and her friend seem rather immature and crude. Just walk away.

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I would not be very happy if my partner’s friend spoke to me in such a disrespectful way. I don’t know why the two of them think this is funny or appropriate, we don’t know know anything about their relationship. It’s up to your girlfriend to set the boundaries here and she is doing a very poor job…

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I would never date someone who thinks it's okay or funny to constantly insult me.  I'd be out the door.

Don't just take it in silence without standing up for yourself.  Tell her you don't like it and she needs to stop.  If it continues, then you should see this for what it is.... rude and immature behavior, and end this relationship.

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Completely unacceptable.

Have you said something to your girlfriend?

Simple solution: stop going out with them. Tell your gf you don't like the person she becomes when her friend is present. If she dismisses how you feel tell her you need a break to reconsider this relationship. 

Edited by Gaeta
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Come on, these things are never just jokes. A joke is a joke when everyone laughs along, not downright insults and hostility. This “friend” has no boundaries and for some reason your girlfriend is ok with it. Why does she allow to treat you like this and sides with the “friend” and not you? Why do you allow to be treated like this?


 

Edited by bene
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Is your girlfriend's friend more than just a friend to her?  Those are sexual "jokes" and would make me wonder why she continues making them.  And I agree with others.  It's crude and not funny even if it only happened once.  But that she keeps saying it is unacceptable.   

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OP, reading your original post, I got a very bad negative feeling about it. 

That they sense your weakness in not standing up for yourself and feeling "hurt".  They may even be laughing about it (sorry).

Versus your feeling disgusted and pissed off at their utter lack of respect and disdain for you.  

In short, they are making fun of you, intentionally humiliating you.  It's a form of bullying.

My advice is don't bother calling them out or telling your 'girlfriend' to knock it off.  

Just leave!   End the relationship.  Wish them both well and be on your merry way. 

Then consider getting some counseling in an effort to understand why this 'hurt" you versus feeling angered and disgusted by it. 

Lord, I'm feeling angered and disgusted just reading about it, it's appalling!

And the fact you said nothing and allowed it is also quite appalling imo.

Get out of this 'relationship' and seek help in understanding your powerlessness otherwise you risk people trashing on you and bullying you for the rest of your days. 

 

 

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On 9/21/2022 at 8:25 PM, Anonymousname21 said:

My girlfriends best friend is always joking with my girlfriend saying things such as she has a bigger dick or my girlfriend will always prefer sex with her. The part that irritates me is that my girlfriend plays along and its constant everytime the 3 of us are together. I am fully aware of how these are just jokes and I shouldn't take it to heart, but regardless of how much I try, the jokes always hurt me. Am I just being jealous or am I right to ask her to stop joking in this way? 

How does this make you feel about your girlfriend and her choice of friends? She chooses to have friends like this so this is in part very much about the person you’re dating. 

There are a few ways to go about this: joke back and dish one out yourself, speak with your girlfriend or tell her friend to stop. My guess is someone with that humour or upbringing doesn’t stop or respect anyone much. You may be rethinking the person you’re dating if you can’t stand their friends. 

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