Dolld2 Posted September 22, 2022 Share Posted September 22, 2022 (edited) My bf doesn't want me to get a tattoo on my collerbone it's only a small amount of writing he said im doing it for attention and he then said he doesn't like them but I already have tattoos Edited September 22, 2022 by a LoveShack.org Moderator clarify title Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted September 22, 2022 Share Posted September 22, 2022 How many tatts do you have and where? Is this something YOU really want? Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted September 22, 2022 Share Posted September 22, 2022 Is he right? What is the motivation exactly? And why are the ones you have not enough? I guess I'm sort of like your boyfriend. I don't get it. I've never dated a tattoo'd woman and that's probably not coincidental. I also don't have bumper stickers or vanity plates on my car. i don't understand what need it addresses. But hey, it's your body to do with as you please. If one more tattoo on your collarbone is the key to happiness, go for it. But don't expect your boyfriend to be over the moon. He's told you how he feels. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted September 22, 2022 Share Posted September 22, 2022 27 minutes ago, Dolld2 said: My bf doesn't want me to get a tattoo on my collerbone it's only a small amount of writing he said im doing it for attention and he then said he doesn't like them but I already have tattoos No one can tell you what to do, only their taste in things. In this case you're incompatible. Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 He doesn't have to like it. It's your body and your choice. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ami1uwant Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 9 hours ago, Dolld2 said: My bf doesn't want me to get a tattoo on my collerbone it's only a small amount of writing he said im doing it for attention and he then said he doesn't like them but I already have tattoos It’s your body your choice…but you also has to accept the consequences of your choices. Me personally…tattoos are a turn off. I am fine if it’s a small one. But there is a point of too much….especially where it’s done. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 Getting a tattoo is a personal choice. (I was reminded of that in a similar thread). Your mister will get over it. Perhaps he'll admire your stamp when he finds it in a location where nobody will see it. But he needs to know that you have carefully considered his input - and that you are certain that the love he has for you is deeper than the dermis. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 12 hours ago, Dolld2 said: he then said he doesn't like them but I already have tattoos And he's just telling you now that he doesn't like tattoos? You're dating the wrong guy. You're attracted to different things. Find a guy who who doesn't take issue with them. And he needs to find a woman without tattoos, if that is his preference. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Dolld2 Posted September 23, 2022 Author Share Posted September 23, 2022 (edited) 13 hours ago, stillafool said: How many tatts do you have and where? Is this something YOU really want? I have them on my arm at the top like a sleeve but it's not a full sleeve oh and a unfinished one on the top of my leg Edited September 23, 2022 by Dolld2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Dolld2 Posted September 23, 2022 Author Share Posted September 23, 2022 28 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said: And he's just telling you now that he doesn't like tattoos? You're dating the wrong guy. You're attracted to different things. Find a guy who who doesn't take issue with them. And he needs to find a woman without tattoos, if that is his preference. Yeah I said why do you go out with me then as I already have them he said he couldn't change that when he met me Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 2 hours ago, Dolld2 said: Yeah I said why do you go out with me then as I already have them he said he couldn't change that when he met me Ok then. This is your fork in the road. No big deal. You'll find other men to date who are into what you're into. It would also be a good idea to cease approval-seeking behaviors. Do what you want. You don't need anyone's permission. Link to post Share on other sites
Ami1uwant Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 5 hours ago, Dolld2 said: Yeah I said why do you go out with me then as I already have them he said he couldn't change that when he met me He said he accepts your past but he doesn’t want you getting a tattoo. If this is a big deal to him he might break up with you. Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 As has been said, it's your body and your choice. If you want another tattoo then get one. If you are going to feel resentful or unhappy for not getting it because of what he said, then it will be a problem for you. He expressed his opinion which he is entitled to do. He's also entitled to choose to end the relationship (as are you) if something is done that he feels strongly negative about. Weigh everything and then make your choice. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 18 hours ago, Dolld2 said: he said im doing it for attention and he then said he doesn't like them but I already have tattoos That tells me you're dating the wrong man. People don't get tattoos to get attention, it's simply an art form for them. My daughter has 75% of her body tattooed. Men are totally into it, or they hate it. She found herself a man that loves it. When they met, she told him she's not done with the tattoos, she was planning on getting one around her neck. The new boyfriend was informed right away and was ok with it. I would not date a man that's not 100% on board with my body. Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 6 hours ago, Dolld2 said: Yeah I said why do you go out with me then as I already have them he said he couldn't change that when he met me If you’re depending on someone else to do the right thing such as this man you’ll be waiting forever. The question is why are YOU dating him knowing his stance on this? Take your time and think about this. End it if it’s not working for you. Link to post Share on other sites
mark clemson Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 It's your collarbone, not his. IMO, ability to compromise is going to be important in any LTR. That goes both ways, but it's not like you're getting a full Maori face tat here. If this is the hill your relationship dies on, well, it may be you're not compatible. I suspect that it won't be, but it's not like I'm always right about these things. GL 1 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 7 hours ago, Dolld2 said: I have them on my arm at the top like a sleeve but it's not a full sleeve oh and a unfinished one on the top of my leg Well you obviously like tattoos and it's clear your boyfriend does not. I say drop this boyfriend and get one you're compatible with who also likes tattoos. Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 Body tattoos are permanent. Each time you choose to wear one, you are committing to keeping them for the rest of your life. No doubt, this decision is totally yours and not imposed on you. Having your boyfriend's opinion should not negate your own, but only let him voice his and let you voice yours. Let him know that you hope he will respect your body decisions and provide an opportunity to tell him why these decisions are important to you. I am sure that if you hear him, he will hear you too. Hopefully, this will resolve matters while keeping both of your feelings in mind at the same time. Otherwise, if you have reached the point where you have to tell him that it is your body and you will do whatever you want, just wait until the relationship is completely dead. Or, do it and simply hasten the inevitable. Link to post Share on other sites
poppyfields Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 (edited) OP, I think dumping him would be harsh especially if this is a long term exclusive committed relationship. Is it? How long have you been together? You posted that he accepts your body, with all your tattoos which you had when you met. He simply expressed his displeasure in your getting another. I don't think that's worthy of a dump unless there are other things you're unhappy with and there exist other more significant incompatibilities. Jmo of course but you don't just dump someone you love and respect (assuming you do) for simply expressing displeasure about something you intend to do. Or are considering doing. You consider their feelings, your feelings and weigh both together. Again jmo, ultimately it's your call to make. Edited September 23, 2022 by poppyfields Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 I have few tattoos and piercings. For me the biggest motivation is that I like the alternative look they give me. I feel like I have non-mainstream personality and lifestyle and I want my inside and outside to match. Basically it's in line with me rejecting societal norms. As for getting a tattoo vs boyfriend doesn't like it - tattoo would always win. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted September 23, 2022 Share Posted September 23, 2022 He made a compromise to date you....are you willing to make a compromise to keep dating him? If not then end the relationship. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted September 24, 2022 Share Posted September 24, 2022 @Dolld2 Initially, I wasn't keen on the fact that the man with whom I am dating had gotten a tattoo (which was actually Henna not permanent) for very different reasons, and we discussed it and came to see both sides of it. My feedback was largely that it wasn't my place to disagree. I would try to understand his point of view, but ultimately, the decision is yours. Happy inkin'! 😊 Link to post Share on other sites
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