Rose90 Posted October 12, 2022 Share Posted October 12, 2022 I’ve been with my boyfriend for 8 months and things were going so well..but for the past couple of weeks, I’ve noticed a few things. The first thing that I did notice was how often he was on his cellphone. The second thing, was that he took pictures of food/crafts that he made to someone on his phone. I thought for sure that it was probably sent to a relative, social media, or a friend that he knew for years…but that wasn’t the case. Come to find out, it was a woman that he met 5 months ago, during our relationship, and he never once mentioned at all anything about meeting a new friend. This person was kept a secret, and I found out about this person only when I had noticed it on his phone while he was checking for something else. Why keep it a secret if this person was just simply a new friend that you treated like any one of your guy friends… I was very upset about it only because it was kept a secret like he didn’t want me to ever find out… Am I wrong for feeling this way and getting upset about it? Do you feel that he was possibly trying to hook up with that person on the side…. Or possibly just wanted a friendship with the opposite sex.. I’m just so confused.. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted October 12, 2022 Share Posted October 12, 2022 1 hour ago, Rose90 said: Or possibly just wanted a friendship with the opposite sex.. I’m just so confused.. Which did he say it was? He's obviously trying to impress this woman but didn't plan to tell you about her as you can see. What are you going to do? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Foxhall Posted October 12, 2022 Share Posted October 12, 2022 1 hour ago, Rose90 said: , was that he took pictures of food/crafts that he made to someone on his phone He may just have a shared interest with the person over this topic, Sometimes guys like to have woman friendships but they are still committed and perfectly loyal to their significant other, they may like the novelty of having a few female friends but that is all-just an ego thing give him the benefit of the doubt I am saying- 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rose90 Posted October 12, 2022 Author Share Posted October 12, 2022 I totally agree. I also felt that he was trying to impress her by texting her those things often. And the way that she was texting him, there’s no way that she even knew that he was in a relationship… even though he claimed that she did know. And to top it off, he lied the first time about the years he knew her for. Only just for a few months and met her while he was in a relationship with me. I had to question him over and over again, until he finally had told me the truth: Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rose90 Posted October 12, 2022 Author Share Posted October 12, 2022 Also, he said that they were both into culinary, so that’s why they had exchanged numbers….. but still…..for months, why keep it a secret…? Even if i did share an interest with the opposite sex, I would never give that person my number to mess up anything in my relationship. And even worse, keep it a secret from the person that I love. That was hurtful. Link to post Share on other sites
poppyfields Posted October 12, 2022 Share Posted October 12, 2022 (edited) 11 hours ago, Rose90 said: Why keep it a secret if this person was just simply a new friend that you treated like any one of your guy friends… I was very upset about it only because it was kept a secret like he didn’t want me to ever find out… Am I wrong for feeling this way and getting upset about it? Why would he keep her a secret? Because he's harboring "feelings" for her beyond friendship. IF she were "just a friend," he would not be hiding it. Are you wrong for feeling upset? No, feelings are never "wrong," they just "are" and you are entitled to them. How you handle your upset feelings is what's important. This early in (less than a year), the best and only thing you can do imo is wish him well and walk away. This flirtation he's got going with her, him trying to impress her, the secrecy, are not the actions of a man who is looking at you and your relationship in any sort of serious way. I would not bother confronting him, or getting angry at him, he will simply deny, make up some excuse or turn it around on you. Just walk is my advice. Aim higher and choose wisely. I'm sorry. Edited October 12, 2022 by poppyfields Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rose90 Posted October 12, 2022 Author Share Posted October 12, 2022 Very true. After finding out the way that I did, I just decided to move on. Thanks everyone. I feel so much better now. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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