He stopped initiating contact but always replies and asks me out

[glows]

On 11/12/2022 at 10:15 AM, karendonaire said:

Thank you everyone. I found out why I feel this way. I told him about a month ago, before our first date - when we met in the gym, it is important for me that we text everyday. He doesn't text me everyday, we don't chat (sometimes we do have a chat conversation for an hour on Instagram) - sometimes he just sends me a couple of texts all day. I told about this to him on our second date that it is what I would like as this is how I feel connected to him. He still doesn't do it. Sometimes he texts me something funny and I react to it with a "haha" iPhone emoji and then he doesn't carry on with the conversation. I have to initiate again to strike up something. Two days ago, he didn't text me all day. He went to LA with his friends for the day, so he wasn't busy with work - not even a "hey"... this bothers me (he still asks me out for dates and we are going out next week tho)

That’s a strong expectation but good that you realize this or see what’s bothering you. I’m guessing you get very attached early on and need to hear from someone to know that you mean something to them. If you’re both agreeing to meet in person you’re on the right track.

Communication does help us get to know one another but give him a chance to want to reach out to you on his own. Dating is a discovery process. Let it unfold more naturally. It takes time for someone to know you’re ok to open up to or talk to more regularly. Wouldn’t you rather someone else figure out on his own he can’t wait to hear from you than dictate what he should do early on? 

 

[JTSW]

On 11/12/2022 at 6:15 PM, karendonaire said:

Thank you everyone. I found out why I feel this way. I told him about a month ago, before our first date - when we met in the gym, it is important for me that we text everyday. He doesn't text me everyday, we don't chat (sometimes we do have a chat conversation for an hour on Instagram) - sometimes he just sends me a couple of texts all day. I told about this to him on our second date that it is what I would like as this is how I feel connected to him. He still doesn't do it. Sometimes he texts me something funny and I react to it with a "haha" iPhone emoji and then he doesn't carry on with the conversation. I have to initiate again to strike up something. Two days ago, he didn't text me all day. He went to LA with his friends for the day, so he wasn't busy with work - not even a "hey"... this bothers me (he still asks me out for dates and we are going out next week tho)

It's important to you that you text every day, yet you ignored his texts when he asked you out.

You're not making any sense OP. 

You are giving him mixed signals so the poor guy doesn't know if he's coming or going. 

He had a day out in LA with friends so he was busy. Cut him some slack.

I don't understand what your problem is.

 

[stillafool]

4 hours ago, JTSW said:

I don't understand what your problem is.

She wants him to chase her and guys aren't into that too much anymore.

[poppyfields]

On 11/12/2022 at 10:15 AM, karendonaire said:

I told him about a month ago, before our first date - when we met in the gym, it is important for me that we text everyday.

I told about this to him on our second date that it is what I would like as this is how I feel connected.

You're gonna drive men away with these types of requests, especially early in when a man is in the process of moving closer to you.. 

Texting every day may make you feel more connected, but in these early stages, he is more likely to feel pressured, burdened and suffocated.

Give him a chance to think about you, wonder about you, miss you!

Many men fall in love through distance, the times you're apart. Google it, read about it, how men fall in love.  

Stop playing games.  You're sending mixed and double messages, like ignoring him when he asked your schedule. 

He probably doesn't know which way is up.

 

Edited November 14, 2022 by poppyfields

[basil67]

Your last thread was also about problems from when you didn't reach out as one would have expected.  A bit of reflection as to the bigger picture here could be helpful

 

 

[JTSW]

It seems that YOU are the problem here OP.

Not the guys you date.

You tell them you need communication every day yet ignore their requests so they back off because it seems like you are not interested.

Your previous posts are all about the same thing.

You give mixed signals.

Time for some self reflection.

Stop complaining about them and look at yourself.