Relationship becoming routine?

[Alex]

I was hoping you could help me out with a possible future problem. My girlfriend and I have been together for 4 months. Things are going great -- we are really compatible and we never really fight. But recently, We've been busy in the day working, at night we take a martial art, and then we usually just kick back and watch a movie to TV for a couple of hours before going to sleep. She mentioned this today, and I don't like the fact that we might be falling into a routine. I'm not afraid to try new things, but I really can't think of any ideas that wouldn't require more than a couple of hours. We're both 20, so we can't go to clubs or bars yet. Also, I'm a very easy-going guy -- I give her a lot of freedom, and don't ask much from her (we still spend every free moment together though). She said sometimes it's good to be a bit demanding and tell her what to do. While I agree with this, I agree up to a point -- I give ideas of what to do and what i want to do, but if she says she doesn't want to go I pretty much say ok. The situation is not really reversed, because there isn't much that I don't like doing. How can I act a little aggressive while not changing my personality? Do you have any suggestions? Thanks!

[bethbonnie]

I was hoping you could help me out with a possible future problem. My girlfriend and I have been together for 4 months. Things are going great -- we are really compatible and we never really fight. But recently, We've been busy in the day working, at night we take a martial art, and then we usually just kick back and watch a movie to TV for a couple of hours before going to sleep. She mentioned this today, and I don't like the fact that we might be falling into a routine. I'm not afraid to try new things, but I really can't think of any ideas that wouldn't require more than a couple of hours. We're both 20, so we can't go to clubs or bars yet. Also, I'm a very easy-going guy -- I give her a lot of freedom, and don't ask much from her (we still spend every free moment together though). She said sometimes it's good to be a bit demanding and tell her what to do. While I agree with this, I agree up to a point -- I give ideas of what to do and what i want to do, but if she says she doesn't want to go I pretty much say ok. The situation is not really reversed, because there isn't much that I don't like doing. How can I act a little aggressive while not changing my personality? Do you have any suggestions? Thanks! Woe...slow down, its only been four months...relax, enjoy the stage of 'friendship' that you are both in...not seeing each other all the time, is healthy, keeps the excitement of it all. When you 'are' able to spend time with each other...thats what its all about.. spending time together, getting to know one another. You sound like a great guy, not wanting to control her in any way, and if you are giving her the freedom to be herself, that is also terrific. Pehaps she may enjoy someone else to make a 'decision' of how to spend your time together. There are many things you can do than doesnt take long...like just sharing a long walk, taking an interest in each others hobbies, or just talking, learning to communitcate to one another. Variety is the 'spice' of life, be creative of how you can enjoy 'quality' time together...even if its just enjoying a game of scrabble. Whether you are with someone for 4 mths, 4 years, or 40 years...there will be times when being with them seems 'routine', but its up to you and your girl to keep the 'spark' in your relationship by being creative and keeping good attention maintenance on any relationship you are in....please dont change for anyone, be yourself, maybe you just may lack a little confidence in making suggestions or decisions...which in time develops, just make sure any decision you make, regardless of it being related to your relationship, friends, work, etc. that you include wisdom in your choices and always weigh up the consequences attached to your choices... Hope this may be of some help...bethbonnie, Australia