hmmhmmm2 Posted December 25, 2022 Share Posted December 25, 2022 I had a female friend who I had gotten to know for a while, and I pursued her for a little while, but it always seemed like she would never fully commit to a relationship, and at times ignored my texts. (For me, anything longer than a week is ignoring). Well, I came to found out that's because she had a boyfriend that she never told me about, and never explained that as the reason. But, here's the catch, I pretty much moved on once I found out, tried to go elsewhere - that's when she starts texting me saying she misses me etc. Now, here's where it gets weird. I explained I wasn't interested in being just a friend and I wanted more. She said she dumped her bf, and wanted to hang out with me, but also needed some time to get over it. I felt like that was pretty normal, so we hung out and we had a bbq. A few days later she starts ignoring my texts again. Of course, I found out, that despite her telling me she needed to get over her ex, she started dating some other guy less than 2 weeks after her breakup. So, I try to move on again. A month passes by.... all of a sudden she's blowing my phone up again, saying she misses me and wants me to come to the bar she works at and talk to her. So what is exactly going on with this girl? Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted December 25, 2022 Share Posted December 25, 2022 She may still be hurt about her break up and have other things going on. She has already played you. As they say, past behaviour is usually a good indicator of future behaviour. Do you see yourself with someone like this? She knows you frequent the bar and seems she uses you as a distraction. You’re the guy she goes to when she’s down but it doesn’t look like she’s that attracted or interested in you as a person. I’m sorry to say that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hmmhmmm2 Posted December 25, 2022 Author Share Posted December 25, 2022 4 hours ago, glows said: She may still be hurt about her break up and have other things going on. She has already played you. As they say, past behaviour is usually a good indicator of future behaviour. Do you see yourself with someone like this? She knows you frequent the bar and seems she uses you as a distraction. You’re the guy she goes to when she’s down but it doesn’t look like she’s that attracted or interested in you as a person. I’m sorry to say that. Actually I don't frequent the bar very much at all. I'm not much of a drinker, but I'll go if there's a friendly outing from time to time, but I would go sometimes if she asked. tbh for a short period of time I had a girlfriend and didn't go while I was dating the other girl. She was asking every day during that point and practically begging to hang out with me, but I don't put myself in positions where I could end up cheating. As for her being hurt about the breakup - that would have made sense had she not jumped into a relationship the very next week while still telling me she wasn't over her ex, hence why I believe it more her to be toying with me. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted December 25, 2022 Share Posted December 25, 2022 4 hours ago, mlssufan01 said: So what is exactly going on with this girl? Sorry to say but this is classic backup plan behavior. She contacts you in between BFs or when bored or lonely.. It may be best to cut her off. Don't go through the headaches and heartaches of buzzing around the friendzone. Refocus you time and energy into clearly consistently interested women. Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted December 26, 2022 Share Posted December 26, 2022 7 hours ago, mlssufan01 said: As for her being hurt about the breakup - that would have made sense had she not jumped into a relationship the very next week while still telling me she wasn't over her ex, hence why I believe it more her to be toying with me. Relationships come easily for some. It doesn’t always mean it’s stable or healthy. She could be toying with you if she knows you have feelings for her or like her. What’s a little harmless teasing? You are dating others anyway. She may think you’re not really taking her seriously in the first place. Are you? What I’m getting from this is a lot of vagueness and she’s not available to you 100%. Maybe it has to do with her break up. Maybe she just doesn’t trust you or like you that much. Can’t put her finger on it but each time she tries, she figures she’s better off with someone else. We don’t know. No one here can really tell you what she wants or what she was thinking. It’s better to close the chapter on this one and be with available women who are consistent in the way they feel or think about you. Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted January 3, 2023 Share Posted January 3, 2023 She definitely doesn't want a relationship with you. You are just someone to pass the time with until the next bf comes along. She is using you and playing you for sure. Cut her off for good. Link to post Share on other sites
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