Worried32 Posted January 6, 2023 Share Posted January 6, 2023 My husband was talking to a female coworker he knows, not well, about our wedding. He then says to her ‘when you getting married?’ Despite it never being mentioned she was engaged or even in a relationship. She said gotta find someone to marry first and then made a joke about how she could marry herself. Do you think it was odd of him to ask? Like was it a way to find out her relationship status? Or am I looking into it way too much and could just be general conversation? He has to message her through work as he works from home a bit. He once said he almost misses her gif game (she used to send a lot of gifs which I admit were funny) and they said how their communication had ceased a bit and they endeavour to keep it up more as she had been going to another colleague for issues since he got a new role. There’s been nothing else inappropriate and they don’t talk daily or for too long but he obviously gets along with her. I can also be on the jealous side. Does any of this sound odd or am I being jealous again? Link to post Share on other sites
BrinnM Posted January 6, 2023 Share Posted January 6, 2023 Does not sound inappropriate to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted January 6, 2023 Share Posted January 6, 2023 (edited) Maybe he wants to set her up with someone he knows. Maybe he's concerned about her future. Could be for a number of reasons. It's a bit uncool to put someone on the spot. Society puts a lot of pressure to marry. If they 'aren't the marrying kind' or haven't found "the one" yet, asking if they are married YET can be a painful question. Edited January 6, 2023 by Alpacalia Link to post Share on other sites
emotionallybroken9 Posted January 6, 2023 Share Posted January 6, 2023 It’ll only be an issue if he keeps digging into her personal life. I mean, people can also just be friends. Lord knows it’s hard enough making friends. to be fair though, I don’t know how well opposite sex friends work. I don’t hang out with any of em without their bf’s or my gf. Not consciously, just, im not friendly like that with em, ya know? do you guys have single opposite sex friends? Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted January 6, 2023 Share Posted January 6, 2023 54 minutes ago, Worried32 said: My husband was talking to a female coworker he knows, not well, about our wedding. He then says to her ‘when you getting married?’ It sounds like he was distancing himself. Try not to fret over it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted January 6, 2023 Share Posted January 6, 2023 Not inappropriate. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted January 7, 2023 Share Posted January 7, 2023 I don't see it as sexually/flirty/romantic inappropriate. But I do see it along the lines of "when are you getting engaged?" "when are you having a baby?" - these questions are intrusive and potentially hurtful because we don't know what might be going on in the background of that person's life. 2 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MickeyBill Posted January 7, 2023 Share Posted January 7, 2023 (edited) If the wedding was recent, then it's a big thing going on in his life, so he might be a little chatty about it. Asking someone who you know is single is just being friendly and most likely without any societal judgment, Sort of like getting married is great, you should try it! OTOH if you have been married many years then it might be weird. lol Edited January 7, 2023 by MickeyBill Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted January 7, 2023 Share Posted January 7, 2023 (edited) I can see how he was trying to distance himself. Better yet, he could have talked about something else entirely. Combined with the gif game or whatever they do to make each other laugh an inordinate amount of time inappropriately during work hours seems immature and silly. Maybe he and you don’t have the same sense of humour or ability or opportunity to go back and forth like that and you see her as competition. I also see where this may cause someone to feel jealous or insecure. My mind wouldn’t naturally think my partner is interested in someone else’s love life if we were solid. Edited January 7, 2023 by glows Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted January 10, 2023 Share Posted January 10, 2023 I think you were overthinking it. Nothing really sounds afoot to me. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted January 10, 2023 Share Posted January 10, 2023 On 1/6/2023 at 12:11 PM, Worried32 said: I can also be on the jealous side. Does any of this sound odd or am I being jealous again? Sounds like he was teasing her. I don't think it's a big deal. Jealousy can end relationships. Link to post Share on other sites
Starswillshine Posted January 10, 2023 Share Posted January 10, 2023 As someone who has extreme boundaries and expects my partner to have those as well, this really seems to be innocent. I wouldn't stress myself over this one too much. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted January 11, 2023 Share Posted January 11, 2023 I don't see anything to worry about. But the fact that you are worried suggests there are some underlying issues here. Do you not trust him? Has he shown real signs of disloyalty in the past, and where did you come across this message? Link to post Share on other sites
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