Gemz Posted November 1, 2005 Share Posted November 1, 2005 I went out with my ex for just under a year. At the start, things were great. We talked of buying a place together and everyday he'd tell me how great it was going to be. A few months later, he said that he had lied about wanting us to move in together - apparently he loved me and didn't want to hurt me. I was hurt though. I'd rather he had been honest. We continued going out, but split up 3 months ago. I love him very much and he tells me that he loves me also, but is happy being single. We talk regularly and he's happy with the relationship we have together. Now here's the problem.... Towards the end of our relationship I started developing strong feelings towards his best friend. I'd always liked him and had always thought he was gorgeous, but obviously didn't think too much about it as I was with my ex. A couple of weeks ago we started chatting in a club. We talked for ages about everything - his family, his dreams, his job. I loved every second of it. We got on really well and flirted constantly. He told me that he'd always liked me. Now I can't stop thinking about him. We've emailed each other quite a bit. I'd apologise for emailing so much - I'd talk to him about my ex as an excuse - bad I know. He'd mail back saying he didn't mind and anytime. He'd also talk of seeing me naked and we'd talked about sex with each other - all in jest though. My friends think he's being serious, but because of the situation he couldn't make it seem like that. At the weekend I was very drunk and stupidly text him to say I wanted to sleep with him. He then text back saying we both know the situation and that he couldn't say the thought hadn't crossed his mind. He then text saying I don't think it would be good to say what I'm thinking. I obviously text something stupid back because he text again saying I would love to satisfy you, but the way things are, i'd have to think twice. What do these texts mean? I need a guys opinion. I feel so embarrassed. I really really like him. I think of him all the time, but it drives me crazy knowing we could never be together. I would never want to hurt my ex and I know his friend wouldn't either. That's why it's so hard. I should never have text him. Now I feel really bad - for him and my ex. How do I get over them both? Please don't be too harsh. I know I did wrong Link to post Share on other sites
downcydeguy Posted November 1, 2005 Share Posted November 1, 2005 Don't take all the blame yourself with this one. The "friend" is not really a friend at all. Dating a friend's ex is completely taboo, period. If you were just some part-time piece of *ss for the ex, then maybe this wouldn't matter at all to him and he would probably encourage his friend to do it. However, dating for almost a year would tell me that it was a little more serious than just a piece of ass. If you think it would hurt your ex, don't do it. If you don't care, do it. Just understand that it will be a sexual relationship only. Link to post Share on other sites
frisky_female Posted November 30, 2005 Share Posted November 30, 2005 i agree that it aint all down to you , i was with my ex for a year and a half , like yourself we was talking about moving in together and the future . thinking back this kinda scared me a bit . near the end me and my ex was fighting over stupid things so i decided to walk away . after i did i got involved with one of his best mates , which at the time i was txtin , and ringing up getting advice , untill one day we sleep together , lets just say , most the lads clicked on and everyone was talking , not about him but me , saying i was a slag and calling me all the names under the sun , but to them he was great . later that week my ex found out and there was killings , to cut a long story short they made up , i stayed with his mate and the lads accepted me into the group once again . now a year down the line , last week , i was left sitting in the pub with my ex as everyone else went home and i was gettin my last bus , out of the blue , he turned round shouting about how i really hurt him , not over the stupid things we did , but because i got with his mate and stayed with him , he said that was just rubbing it in his face , which now looking back i have got to agree with him . i never wanted to hurt anyone but thats what ive done and thats what ive gotta live with . me and his mate who im with at the moment are going threw a rough patch and thats because my ex can not forgive us . thats just my story , but a bit of advice , Be Wide . and at the end of the day its up to you what you do . good luck Link to post Share on other sites
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