Feeling weird about seeing a friend with someone special?

[v1kidion]

I go latin dancing quite often and met this girl with whom I went out a few times. I quickly realized that we weren't meant to be together. We remained friends and would see each other on and off on the dance floor and would chat with each other about life. Then a couple of weeks ago I saw her with this other guy and had a weird feeling. I am 100% sure I have no interest in her but also not sure how to handle the situation. Like do I greet her like normal and talk with her when she is with another guy but at the same time if I ignore her then it would seem weird. I did have similar issues where I wasn't interest in the girl but when I saw them with another person when I was single I felt weird and not sure how to handle the situation?

Edited January 27, 2023 by v1kidion

[stillafool]

Just be happy for them and say hi to her and the guy in a friendly way and just keep it moving.  If she's with another guy it's not appropriate to start up a chat with her.  She isn't a friend of yours.  If she's now with another guy there's no need to feel awkward,she's moved on and no longer cares.

[MsJayne]

Act like you're her friend, because that's what you are. It's up to her to tell the new guy there was "something" between you, and she may not consider it significant enough to even mention. 

[Lotsgoingon]

I'm not sure what you're worried about. You have a previous relationship with this woman, and nowadays women (and men) don't have to avoid all contact with the opposite gender when they're partnered.

You show up as you want to show up. You'll partly respond to how she is. If you go out with her and the guy, you bring him into your conversation and sorta tell your stories about the woman in a relaxed way. 

Your reactions here are really not necessary and very old fashion. These days women and men have friends of the opposite gender that continue even after they date and after they marry. And they form new friendship relationships (often from work) with people from the opposite gender. 

You might have some old-time relative's voice in your head, but you can relax.

Now, I also have been part of dance scenes, and there is special chemistry between some dancers. And depending on the social dance, that chemistry can be flirtatious. But that's dance chemistry and not chemistry that necessarily survives once you hit the sidewalk. It's the weirdest thing but I've seen many dancers write about this. You can have torrid chemistry on the dance floor with someone and that means NOTHING for how you relate off the dance floor. The opposite also applies: you can really like someone but that doesn't mean you'll have dance chemistry with them once you hit the floor---even if you both dance and dance at a similar skill level!

Maybe you're feeling odd because you sense a bit of attraction to this woman. That's fine. Lots of friends have some attraction to their opposite-sex friends.  But you don't flirt and you remind yourself that you don't want to date them. So don't panic if you have a bit of attraction to this woman. That's fine.

 

Edited January 28, 2023 by Lotsgoingon