AmazingIsh Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 I don’t know if it was from all the feedback or not. But this weekend was great. Can limerence just dissolve itself so quick? I did not obsessively think about my AF, not did I care if he called, nor did I send him sexy text. I hope I can keep this energy. While he feels so good to me, I know that we both have families that are our priorities. Yup and it sucks that he is my coworker because I have to see him. So I’m figuring out how to stop. Hopefully a therapist can help me. I really do want to stop. But I really felt like our sex was the best I ever had…outside of that I’m not wanting him as a person nor do I have fantasies about us ever being together. Something really clicked and why would I find so my attention to someone when I have my own. Again just trying to contend with the idea of breaking away from his sex. Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 A big step would be not working in the same place as him. Seeing him all the time is not gonna help at all. Are there any other departments either of you could move to? Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 1 hour ago, AmazingIsh said: Again just trying to contend with the idea of breaking away from his sex. Unfortunately you work together. But that's not the issue. In addition to seeing your physician, have you looked into support groups for this?: https://saa-recovery.org/am-i-a-sex-addict/self-assessment/ Link to post Share on other sites
Will am I Posted January 31, 2023 Share Posted January 31, 2023 On 1/30/2023 at 1:16 PM, AmazingIsh said: I really do want to stop. It sounds like you [purposely] want to stop, but [emotionally, physically] desire to continue. When your motives are conflicting like this, typically nothing happens and the status quo will continue. I think you should be looking (privately) into this question: why is it that you want two opposite things at the same time? Everyone has inner conflicts, some of us have them more than others. I think this subject is something that a therapist can help you with. Link to post Share on other sites
mark clemson Posted February 1, 2023 Share Posted February 1, 2023 IF it's limerence, it has a tendency to ebb and flow. So it's likely to return at some point. If you're just "over him" quickly and straightforwardly then probably there was no strong limerence. Limerence involves neural changes and so doesn't become "full-blown" OR end rapidly. Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted February 2, 2023 Share Posted February 2, 2023 (edited) Maybe he and his sex are not that great afterall if you have reservations. Can you be cordial and professional and not pay attention to anything else? Edited February 2, 2023 by glows Link to post Share on other sites
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