Mixed messages from Ex

[Bl8ckMamba24]

So when I last posted I think I was at a point where me and my ex had cut all contact before Xmas. This lasted until the 9th of Jan 23, a day after my birthday. 

However about a week after Xmas I had a random add from a Snapchat account. I began speaking to it as I had reservations about who was behind the account. Ofcourse as a I questioned the account it was very obvious it was someone I knew. They knew it was my birthday because Snapchat shows it. The person's first assumption is that I would go to a casino, random right... Well only my most recent ex knows I enjoy casinos. Then we spoke about the topic of cars and this person knew I had a blk BMW which couldn't have been found from social media as it's not advertised up there.. again only my ex would know that. Anyway the account continued to probe about what I was doing on my birthday and I told the account and all the while the account was watching all of my posts on Snapchat. 

On the 9th January 23 my ex finally messaged me from her own number explaining that she was going to drop mail off to my military base at the guard room and asked me how my birthday was and was being very pleasant. She knew my base wouldn't accept mail at the front gate. Anyway I ignored the message. She then turned up on my camp and called me and then texted me till eventually I responded to get my mail. Ironically she had written the address and details so she could have just posted it... Anyway I collected it and then we spent 2 hours talking and she was asking me how I'd been etc... Anyway I said I was fine and mentioned that a Snapchat account had added me and that I thought it was my previous ex before her... She didn't respond how I'd expect it was almost like she knew about it because it was her... Anyway I let it slide and she went on to drop seeds stating she missed me in her life and how hard it was. I again didn't respond to this and went back to camp. Later that week we continued talking and she wanted to know what I couldn't forgive her for during the breakup so I told her and I could see she wanted closure but given how she left me and in the conditions I wasn't prepared to help her out given she walked away from me. She couldn't understand why I felt how I did. Then I decided to ask her if she had been with anyone since we broke up and she started acting shady and eventually admitted she had a one night stand a month after we ended.. this was ironic because she had a go at me once stating that if I had ever done this she would think less of me and never want to talk to me again etc... So when I heard this I called her out on her hypocrisy. She then spouted on about how lost she was and that she would have rather had it with me but knew she wouldn't get it so went with a randomer... Even now I don't believe the person was random. She continued to state she didn't mean to hurt me etc etc. My responses were very much like I see her differently and its all changed now because of what she chose to do. The day after this she had changed from being sympathetic and nice to being heartless and destructive stating she didn't do anything wrong and I should get over myself etc.... I went to visit her to give her a hug and say goodbye because we had never done it properly during the initial break,she then later that night via email as she had blocked me on everything else decided to state SHE didn't want to see me again or talk to me again and that she was finished with me (projection clearly).

Anyway I never responded to her. Communications stopped at this point on the 16th Jan 23. 

I still had this Snapchat account watching me so I went back to probe it and effectively caught my ex out and expressed that the game is up and I know it's her and she responded saying don't you care anymore? Don't you love me? My response was confused and I said we had this conversation again yes I do still love you but you said you wanted nothing to do with me anymore but yet make fake accounts. I also told her that when she was ready to she could talk to me by normal means rather than behind a fake Snapchat account.

She then deactivated the fake account and everything was left as was. Then a few days later I went flying with a friend and during that time she had reactivated the fake account and seen I had been flying and had messaged me saying that I was soo full of s*** and then redeactivated the account before I could respond. I still didn't bother to pursue talking to her by normal means and question her and I ignored it... Since then I have seen that someone has been watching my stories as it comes up as +1 more which indicates someone who's not your friend or has blocked you has viewed your story, I presume it's her but again I ignored it. 

Now fast forward to the 14th Feb 23. I went to my therapy appointment and my therapist had told me that my ex had got in contact with her to attempt to organise appointments with my therapist. As my therapist stated to my ex, it was inappropriate because I am one of her patients already and could raise a conflict of interest. 

Now I am very well aware that I should continue as I am.

I just wanted to see others views on what they think my ex is trying to do, is she trying to be malicious and destructive? Is she regretting her decisions? Is she confused? Is she trying to manipulate me? Is she trying to get me to respond to her by official means to boost her ego?

I just want generalised thoughts and opinions as well as brute honesty. 

I still love her but with where she's at ATM I could never go there with her. Is she just going through a moment where eventually she will stop all of this and just move on? Or can I expect to potentially hear from her again? 

The shocking thing is I'm 30 yrs old and she's 42 so to see a 42 year old creating fake accounts and behaving as a 12 year old is shocking in itself.

She has stayed she is struggling with this break up more than she anticipated and that I'm having a greater affect on her than her last two ex husbands and other relationships.

[Wiseman2]

41 minutes ago, Bl8ckMamba24 said:

. As my therapist stated to my ex, it was inappropriate because I am one of her patients  The shocking thing is I'm 30 yrs old and she's 42 

Sorry this is happening. Did your therapist suggest you get a restraining order? Perhaps she's harmless, but she's escalating increasing bizarre and inappropriate behavior.

Was there a history of this type of unhinged behavior? Is this the same woman?:

 

[Bl8ckMamba24]

3 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Sorry this is happening. Did your therapist suggest you get a restraining order? Perhaps she's harmless, but she's escalating increasing bizarre and inappropriate behavior.

Was there a history of this type of unhinged behavior? Is this the same woman?:

 

Yes Wiseman it is the same woman from back then.

Additionally I did tell her she could see my therapist while we were together but I mean if you want 0 to do with me why would you still attempt to go there..

She is harmless she's never been vicious or dangerous so no risk of that element.

[basil67]

3 hours ago, Bl8ckMamba24 said:

The shocking thing is I'm 30 yrs old and she's 42 so to see a 42 year old creating fake accounts and behaving as a 12 year old is shocking in itself.

Age and maturity have no connection.  Some people are born sensible and others behave stupidly for their whole lives.  But do remember, given the rookie errors you've made since the breakup, you're also part of the equation because you allow her to do this.  How?

* Lack of blocking her after the last thread you made

* Leaving the door open by either a) not having your mail redirected when you no longer wanted it to go to her or b) you changed your important addresses and then engaged over the junk mail which went to her.

*Engaging with a random snapchat account which you suspected to be her.   

In short, make sure she gets no more mail from you, block her from contacting you and tidy up your social media privacy settings so that random strangers cannot contact you.  

[JTSW]

Creating fake accounts to spy on an ex is very concerning psychopathic behaviour.

Especially with wanting the same therapist too.

She just wants to manipulate you both.

Why haven't you blocked this fake account?

Why haven't you blocked her everywhere?