kleaners Posted February 21, 2023 Share Posted February 21, 2023 I could use some positive reinforcement. I'm nervous about tonight's first date. I matched with someone last Monday. The initial conversation went well and I asked her out. Unfortunately the soonest she was available is today. We both joked about being able to keep the momentum going between then and now. It's gone swimmingly. We've texted each other good morning and goodnight greetings. We chat during the day and have kept each other up late at night. The conversation has been lively and we've both been equally engaged. We've even been a bit flirty. A couple days into our exchange she was talking about a favorite walking trail and I jokingly suggested she could take me there on our second date. She agreed. Another conversation we were talking about a restaurant which she said serves great fried calamari, to which she said we can go on our fourth date. To which I replied: so you're saying there will be a fourth date? She said: If you're as sweet and charismatic in person, yes. It's to the point we've already outlined five dates (including the first one tonight). Although this is our first date, it's not our first meeting. Coincidentally we happened to be seeing the same movie at the same theater, just at different times. We met up for a couple minutes as my movie ended and hers was beginning. My problem is, I know I can be the person behind all the text messages, but I tend to be shy around new people and I'm worried I won't be the person she expects. Knowing I have one foot in the door already, the expectations seem to be higher and I'm nervous about screwing things up. I think we've both built each other up in our minds based on words on a screen and I'm concerned that maybe it won't translate well in person. Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted February 21, 2023 Share Posted February 21, 2023 It sounds like you've built up a great rapport with this person, and you should feel proud of yourself for having such engaging and flirty conversations with her. It's natural to feel nervous before a first date, especially when you've built up expectations and are worried about living up to them. However, it's important to remember that the person you've been chatting with is interested in getting to know you as a whole person, and not just the words on a screen. Remember that she agreed to go on a date with you because she is already interested in you, and she wouldn't have planned future dates with you if she didn't think you were worth spending time with. Be yourself, and don't try to be someone you're not just to meet the expectations you think she has. It's okay to be shy around new people, and it's also okay to take a little time to warm up to someone new. It's possible that things may not go as smoothly as you hope, but that's okay too. Dating is a process of discovery, and sometimes things don't work out even when you have a great connection online. Regardless of the outcome, give yourself credit for putting yourself out there and taking a chance on someone you're interested in. Good luck on your date, and I hope it goes well! Link to post Share on other sites
Author kleaners Posted February 21, 2023 Author Share Posted February 21, 2023 Thank you, Alpaclia. I definitely won't be anybody but myself. It's just not who I am to present myself otherwise. I already know she likes me for me - or at least the guy behind the screen. 🤣 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author kleaners Posted February 22, 2023 Author Share Posted February 22, 2023 I'm home from the date. I think it went well. We kissed in the parking lot and we exchanged numbers. She needed to get home to her kids, so I wasn't able to ask about a second date, but I'll definitely do that before heading to bed. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Ami1uwant Posted February 22, 2023 Share Posted February 22, 2023 Kissing is a good sign of getting another date. You wait to long to reach out coukd be a problem. Link to post Share on other sites
Author kleaners Posted February 22, 2023 Author Share Posted February 22, 2023 5 hours ago, Ami1uwant said: Kissing is a good sign of getting another date. You wait to long to reach out coukd be a problem. I didn't wait long at all. She agreed to a second date. Just waiting to see if she'll be able to secure a sitter for Sunday afternoon. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted February 26, 2023 Share Posted February 26, 2023 Were you able to meet her today? Link to post Share on other sites
Author kleaners Posted February 27, 2023 Author Share Posted February 27, 2023 1 hour ago, justwhoiam said: Were you able to meet her today? Yes, but not as originally planned. I had tickets to see Jeff Dunham and invited her to go with me. As much as she wanted to, she couldn't pull it off. We were supposed to have date number two yesterday, but it snowed a bit and spoiled plans. We were able to meet for breakfast this morning before I left for the show. I haven't had a chance to ask her how the week looks for date number three. Link to post Share on other sites
Alvi Posted February 27, 2023 Share Posted February 27, 2023 8 minutes ago, kleaners said: We were supposed to have date number two yesterday, but it snowed a bit and spoiled plans. Could you not meet for any indoor activities instead? Coffee, dinner, bowling, mini-golf, movie, walk in a mall, etc...It's not like it is set in stone that you only have to do a particular activity that you've agreed on prior to the date. Link to post Share on other sites
Author kleaners Posted February 27, 2023 Author Share Posted February 27, 2023 1 minute ago, Alvi said: Could you not meet for any indoor activities instead? Coffee, dinner, bowling, mini-golf, movie, walk in a mall, etc...It's not like it is set in stone that you only have to do a particular activity that you've agreed on prior to the date. We're not actually sticking to any script. The plan was to get lunch yesterday, but the roads were a bit messy so she suggested breakfast today instead, which was fine with me. We did joke this morning that winter sucks for dating because of the limited options - a meal, movie, bowling, or pool. Yesterday we were talking about favorite desserts and Disney movies, so at some point we're going to do a baking/movie date. Link to post Share on other sites
Alvi Posted February 27, 2023 Share Posted February 27, 2023 2 minutes ago, kleaners said: We did joke this morning that winter sucks for dating because of the limited options - a meal, movie, bowling, or pool. The point is that you can spend time together getting to know each other. But better stay safe if roads are bad. 3 minutes ago, kleaners said: Yesterday we were talking about favorite desserts and Disney movies, so at some point we're going to do a baking/movie date. Sound lovely. Hopefully, the both of you can agree on a time and a day. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author kleaners Posted February 27, 2023 Author Share Posted February 27, 2023 1 minute ago, Alvi said: The point is that you can spend time together getting to know each other. But better stay safe if roads are bad. I probably would have made the drive (there wasn't that much accumulation), but I did tell her I appreciated her looking out for my safety. 1 minute ago, Alvi said: Sound lovely. Hopefully, the both of you can agree on a time and a day. Yes. Certainly one of the strangest date suggestions, but sounds totally fun. Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted March 3, 2023 Share Posted March 3, 2023 On 2/27/2023 at 2:16 AM, kleaners said: winter sucks for dating because of the limited options - a meal, movie, bowling, or pool. Hmm... I think there's lots more... like a museum, ice skating, indoor mini golf, theater (but you mentioned tickets to a show, so you already know that one), a cooking lesson or a painting session, and much more! Link to post Share on other sites
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