Jump to content

Should I stay with him?


Recommended Posts

The guy Iā€™m dating right now, weā€™ve had a bit of a rocky start, weā€™ve known each other for years, and we were both single when we first met . We have both had our girl/boyfriends in the meantime, but now weā€™re both single again and weā€™re hanging out and enjoying each others company, but I still have this nagging feeling of his exes lurking. Not only cuz he tells me about the exes in his life, and how one of them still wants a chance with him. But another slightly odd thing he has done two or three times now is bringing over gifts that are from his last relationship. Gifts that are half used, or just Ā«didnā€™t open it while we were togetherĀ» What should I do about this? it really bugs me that he talks about the ex, like we we we.. like theyā€™re still together.. Something feels off to meā€¦

Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, Untitled123 said:

Ā bringing over gifts that are from his last relationship. Gifts that are half used, or just Ā«didnā€™t open it while we were togetherĀ»Ā 

How long have you been dating? Why was it "rocky"?Ā 

Are you exclusive or FWB or is he still talking to and seeing his exes?

Ask him not to bring you these leftovers. Reflect if you're compatible especially regarding his talking about his exes too much and worse, giving you their leftovers.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Thank you for the response! šŸ˜Š

The first two-three months it felt like more of a fling, like more of a FWB sorta thing but now we are seeing each other more often, almost every weekend, he says he likes me a lot, but I am unsure about how "in love" I am..Ā 

It felt a bit rocky at the start because he was still owning an apartment with his ex, they were broken up by then, but yeah they had some logistics that had to be taken care of so it didn't feel over over..Ā 

now it has been some months, but damn im getting tired of these leftovers...

what should I do?

Ā 

Edited by Untitled123
  • Thanks 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Be honest with him.

Tell him straight that you feel uncomfortable when he talks about his ex's.

Also tell him straight not to bring any of those gifts anymore because it also makes you feel uncomfortable.

Ask him what he wants because he cant have both you and his ex's.

Sounds like you may also get a bit of trouble with the one that wants him back.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

He has trouble reading the room. The used gifts,Ā the ā€œwe, we, weā€ talking about exes,Ā telling you one of the exes wants him, (Iā€™m not convinced).Ā Heā€™s clueless and at least needs to be told how insensitive heā€™s being, but do you really want to be in a relationship with someone so self absorbed?Ā 

  • Thanks 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Thank you so much for your honesty!Ā 
That's exactly some of the thoughts thatĀ have been hitting me lately.. do I really want to be with him? there's a general lack of trust and romance, and I am growing tired nowĀ 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Ā There's nothing to question here....what you see is what you get. You shouldn't have to put training wheels on an adult man. I'd just offer the friendship card and pass on a relationship. Ā 

Link to post
Share on other sites
Ɨ
Ɨ
  • Create New...