Kassieee Posted February 24, 2023 Share Posted February 24, 2023 If an ex is wishy washy about their communication with you, meaning one day they act completely fine after the break up. Then one day they tell you not to contact them. Just to contact you again a week or so later is that a sign they are in some sort of distress? And you should continue to not contact them although you have no issues with them, you broke up with them. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kassieee Posted February 24, 2023 Author Share Posted February 24, 2023 Would that be considered leading them on. Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted February 24, 2023 Share Posted February 24, 2023 Would continuing to NOT CONTACT an ex be considered "leading them on"? That's your question? No. Absence of contact is not leading anyone on. Happy to be of help. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kassieee Posted February 24, 2023 Author Share Posted February 24, 2023 Let me clarify. Would it be considered leading an ex on if you continued communication if they are struggling with the break up. Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted February 24, 2023 Share Posted February 24, 2023 6 minutes ago, justaskingok said: Let me clarify. Would it be considered leading an ex on if you continued communication if they are struggling with the break up. Where does "wishy-washy" come into it? Generally, dumpers and dumpees should leave each other alone. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kassieee Posted February 24, 2023 Author Share Posted February 24, 2023 1 minute ago, NuevoYorko said: Where does "wishy-washy" come into it? Generally, dumpers and dumpees should leave each other alone. First being OK with communication.then deciding not ok with communication. And now wants to communicate again. Wishy washy. Link to post Share on other sites
Lotsgoingon Posted February 24, 2023 Share Posted February 24, 2023 People reach out to exes because they don't want to just go through the sadness. You are under no obligation to re-engage with them. In fact, it's 99 percent of the time completely unhealthy. Ironically contact blocks the dumped person from moving---contact slows them down. They need to know the door is closed. And yes, I've been on both sides of this divide and clarity and no context is the best--for both people. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted February 25, 2023 Share Posted February 25, 2023 6 hours ago, justaskingok said: And now wants to communicate again. You can control your life and feelings by simply deleting and blocking an ex. There's no need to figure him out. If you want him back, try to meet up and reconcile. If not, delete and block so you are free to move forward and date others. Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted February 27, 2023 Share Posted February 27, 2023 Stay no contact. If you engage, he will talk for a bit then disappear again. How old are you? Teens right? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kassieee Posted February 27, 2023 Author Share Posted February 27, 2023 8 minutes ago, JTSW said: Stay no contact. If you engage, he will talk for a bit then disappear again. How old are you? Teens right? I don't tell my personal business unless it's on my terms and what my age is is irrelevant to this topic,sorry . Thanks for the your advice! Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted February 28, 2023 Share Posted February 28, 2023 It’s better to go your separate ways and recoup with grace rather than carry on like this. What’s happening now isn’t working so try something else. Be at peace with the break up and let go of the friendship too, not just the relationship. It is totally fine to let go out of respect for one another. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Bluesandy Posted March 7, 2023 Share Posted March 7, 2023 (edited) Not that easy.. The dumpee has phases were he tries to be strong, so the no contact phases, and then realizes that he needs some sort of contact with you to be good... you got two solutions. The hard way, so no contact with your ex, or the soft way, staying in the contact but if you are sure about your decision, trying each time to tell in a good manner your ex that your decision is final, and explaining honestly why of course if you know it lol keeping things soft will make your ex a good friend in the future.. Depend on your will.... Edited March 7, 2023 by Bluesandy Link to post Share on other sites
flitzanu Posted March 7, 2023 Share Posted March 7, 2023 if you don't plan on getting back together with your ex, and he wants to get back together with you, then as others said it is best that YOU enforce boundaries. you dumped him because you don't want him in your life anymore and you need to enforce that. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted March 7, 2023 Share Posted March 7, 2023 On 2/27/2023 at 9:11 AM, justaskingok said: I don't tell my personal business unless it's on my terms and what my age is is irrelevant to this topic,sorry . Thanks for the your advice! Actually it's very relevant because age helps us to know how to respond to your questions. We probably wouldn't give the same advice to a 16 year old versus a 30 year old, etc. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted March 7, 2023 Share Posted March 7, 2023 On 2/24/2023 at 6:39 PM, justaskingok said: Let me clarify. Would it be considered leading an ex on if you continued communication if they are struggling with the break up. Yes it most certainly is leading them on. If you no longer want the relationship with them you should show respect and stay away from them so they can heal. They cannot heal if they are hearing from you or seeing you. You are not their friend but their ex so it's best to act like it for their sake. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kassieee Posted March 7, 2023 Author Share Posted March 7, 2023 2 hours ago, flitzanu said: if you don't plan on getting back together with your ex, and he wants to get back together with you, then as others said it is best that YOU enforce boundaries. you dumped him because you don't want him in your life anymore and you need to enforce that. Will not contact him or respond, thank you! Link to post Share on other sites
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