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Bf gave me a pill and lied about what it was

Vfway837

By Vfway837,
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Vfway837

Vfway837

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My boyfriend(27) and I(20)have only been dating for a couple of months. We knew each other before this but moved fast. Our relationship has been really good and I always thought we had potential but this has me rethinking our entire relationship and he just doesn’t get it. 

We just got back from a vacation with some of his friends. The trip was great and we all had a lot of fun except for this one terrible experience. 

We all went out one night and all of us drank every night. A couple of people came back to our rental with us. He started trying to hand me something and it was a pill. I asked him what it was and his answer was it was a common pain pill. I do drugs recreationally sometimes. After a while he started asking me how I was feeling and if I was ok. After a few times of this I got suspicious and started asking him why and started to get freaked out. He brought me into another room and told me not to be mad that is was ecstasy or Molly. I went off on him like bad. I am anxiety prone and do not f with anything that increases my heart rate, I don’t even drink energy drinks. I was beyond furious and the anxiety was instant. He wanted me to have fun and us to have great sex. I told him I would never do ecstasy and he clearly knew that and is why he lied to me. I told him that he totally abused my trust and that I would never accept anything from him again. I even asked him if he was 100% sure that was what it was and he said yes and that one of our friends took one already and was fine. We were both really messed up and fought for a while. I had to break into my emergency anxiety medication. All around terrible time and it ruined my trip, I thought I was going to have to go to the hospital.

This was last weekend and I am still mad at him. He is at the point where he thinks he has been punished enough and wants me to get over it, but I am having a really hard time with it. I wouldn’t do that to someone I hated. Who does that? I don’t see how this is any different than him or anyone else handing me a drink with drugs in it tbh. I’m thinking about ending it. We are in the same friend group and they think that he was wrong but that I should forgive him.

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basil67

basil67

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Wow, it didn't take long for him to show his true colours!  And you're absolutely correct that it's no different to spiking your drink

This would be an automatic dealbreaker for me.

 

Edited by basil67
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Wiseman2

Wiseman2

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4 hours ago, Vfway837 said:

 . He wanted me to have fun and us to have great sex

Sorry this happened to you. What he did was dangerous, exploitative and illegal. End it. Read up on drugging women to have sex. Cut your losses. He's a creep. Delete and block him and all his people from ALL your social media and messaging apps.

See if you are ok. Go to a physician for some tests. Explain what happened to you. Consider reporting him to the police. Do not minimize this crime.

Edited by Wiseman2
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Ray_xx

Ray_xx

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7 hours ago, Vfway837 said:

My boyfriend(27) and I(20)have only been dating for a couple of months. We knew each other before this but moved fast. Our relationship has been really good and I always thought we had potential but this has me rethinking our entire relationship and he just doesn’t get it. 

We just got back from a vacation with some of his friends. The trip was great and we all had a lot of fun except for this one terrible experience. 

We all went out one night and all of us drank every night. A couple of people came back to our rental with us. He started trying to hand me something and it was a pill. I asked him what it was and his answer was it was a common pain pill. I do drugs recreationally sometimes. After a while he started asking me how I was feeling and if I was ok. After a few times of this I got suspicious and started asking him why and started to get freaked out. He brought me into another room and told me not to be mad that is was ecstasy or Molly. I went off on him like bad. I am anxiety prone and do not f with anything that increases my heart rate, I don’t even drink energy drinks. I was beyond furious and the anxiety was instant. He wanted me to have fun and us to have great sex. I told him I would never do ecstasy and he clearly knew that and is why he lied to me. I told him that he totally abused my trust and that I would never accept anything from him again. I even asked him if he was 100% sure that was what it was and he said yes and that one of our friends took one already and was fine. We were both really messed up and fought for a while. I had to break into my emergency anxiety medication. All around terrible time and it ruined my trip, I thought I was going to have to go to the hospital.

This was last weekend and I am still mad at him. He is at the point where he thinks he has been punished enough and wants me to get over it, but I am having a really hard time with it. I wouldn’t do that to someone I hated. Who does that? I don’t see how this is any different than him or anyone else handing me a drink with drugs in it tbh. I’m thinking about ending it. We are in the same friend group and they think that he was wrong but that I should forgive him.

Report to the police and get out of this drug relationship and drug den before it's too late! drugs are out dated, addictive, mess up mental health and most of all, they are a killer. 

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Ray_xx

Ray_xx

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4 minutes ago, Ray_xx said:

Report to the police and get out of this drug relationship and drug den before it's too late! drugs are out dated, addictive, mess up mental health and most of all, they are a killer. 

PS - if you had of reacted badly or died, he would now be in prison for man slaughter 

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stillafool

stillafool

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12 hours ago, semble said:

You've got some accountability here. You took the pill without understanding what it was.

I agree with this.  Who takes a pill not knowing what it is?  Still, he is untrustworthy and you should end it.

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Vfway837

Vfway837

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17 hours ago, semble said:

You've got some accountability here. You took the pill without understanding what it was.

Only because he lied to me. If he was honest I never would have taken it.

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semble

semble

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Technically he didn't lie.

He said it's a common pain pill.

How difficult would it have been for you to ask him exactly what it was?

"Oh, it's a common pain pill? Gulp!"

 

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stillafool

stillafool

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2 hours ago, Vfway837 said:

Only because he lied to me. If he was honest I never would have taken it.

We're you in pain when he gave it to you?  

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Vfway837

Vfway837

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2 hours ago, semble said:

Technically he didn't lie.

He said it's a common pain pill.

How difficult would it have been for you to ask him exactly what it was?

"Oh, it's a common pain pill? Gulp!"

 

He told me it was a specific pill. I didn’t name it because I don’t think most people know the difference. There is a huge difference between an oxy and ecstasy or molly. I even asked him if he was sure. He knowingly lied to me because he wanted me to be on ecstasy.

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Wiseman2

Wiseman2

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3 hours ago, Vfway837 said:

. He knowingly lied to me because he wanted me to be on ecstasy.

This is a crime. Delete and block him and all his people from ALL your social media and messaging apps. See a physician for a checkup. Please reconsider mixing and matching street drugs and alcohol. It puts your health and safety in danger. Try to have fun in ways that don't endanger you.  Especially don't hang out with creeps that spike drinks or drug women for sex.

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JTSW

JTSW

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Yes, he did a very dangerous thing by giving you a pill and lying about what it was. 

But you didn't have to take it, that's on you.

He didn't force it down your throat.

To took it willingly.

You know now that he 100% cannot be trusted, so your best bet is to end it now.

Hopefully he will learn his lesson.

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ShyViolet

ShyViolet

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How on earth is it that you haven't already broken up with him?  This is beyond crazy.

On 4/9/2023 at 9:41 PM, semble said:

You've got some accountability here. You took the pill without understanding what it was.

I have to agree with this though.  Taking a random pill that someone hands you is not a normal thing to do. 

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mark clemson

mark clemson

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IMO this is not something you should accept in a partner. Once is not a pattern, twice would be (again IMO).

Given how casually this person took risks with your health/mental health, they are likely not fully thinking straight. I suspect other inappropriate/extremely disrespectful/unsafe behaviors will emerge sooner or later, so my thought would be to just walk away pre-emptively before you're "bonded" and/or something even worse happens.

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