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I don't want him to break my heart again


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NightsInWhiteSatin

Me and my boyfriend spent a year slowly getting together because at the time we could not have a proper relationship due to work and studying. Then four months ago after he quit his job to become self employed we decided to become offical. A week after we became offical he went out one night with our mutual friends and my best friend. That night he cheated on me with my best friend of 5 years. My best friend came round the next day telling me all about the night out and told me she'd been watching my b/f and he didn't cheat on me once and i was over the moon because men seem to have a habbit of cheating on me with my friends. The next night i went out with my boyfriend and we both had a great time etc then just as the night ended he fessed up and told me he'd cheated on me with my best mate and all he could remember was just kissing because he was really drunk and couldnt remember anything else. I was heartbroken and spent the night sat at the bottom of his bed crying my eyes out. He started pouring his heart out telling me he was falling in love with me and that he'd be devastated if he lost me. The truth is that this best friend of mine has been the friend which two of my ex's had cheated on me with. She had thrown herself at my other friends b/f the same night that mine had cheated on me with her. So it was bye bye best friend but i didnt know what to do about my b/f because i was falling in love with him too. It turns out they'd kissed and got a little bit 'touchy feely'. He said he couldnt understand why it had happened because he was falling in love with me and wasnt attracted to my best friend at all. I decided to leave it a week to think things through and decide whether or not to continue the relationship. I sat down with my mum and other true best friend and talked it through for hours and came to the decision not to end the relationship. Now 4 months down the line i'm starting to realize even though he promised to stay faithful to me (and as far as i know he has so far) that i still dont trust him entirely. He doesnt have a history of cheating im the only girlfriend he's ever cheated on and we have both grown deeply in love with eachother over the past 4 months and it scares me because i have never felt anything like this for anyone and if he ever did cheat on me again it'd seriously damage me and i am still very insecure from the last time he cheated on me. My friend who is female and very attractive one of those girls every bloke goes for not just for looks she's got a great personality aswell has been inviting me and my b/f to come to her house for a drink or go out for a drink for the past 4 months...and i have told him once...he is very busy so i just tell my friend he's too busy everytime she asks and also ive noticed i cant sleep if i know he's gone out drinking with friends etc and i'm planning on talking to him about it because i need his reasurrance every once in a while especially now when things have grown so strong between us but i dont want him to see me as being jealous and possessive

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This is a tough situation. I know what it is like though, I caught my ex having dinner with another girl, on my birthday!!

The truth is, that if you do not have trust, you will have a bumpy road ahead of you with this relationship. Glad to hear you got rid of your "best friend" because a best friend does not kiss her friends boyfriend! One good thing, if you can call it good, is that he told you the truth. Try to look at all the positive things in the relationship, and pick out the good parts about your boyfriend. Then look at the negatives, and if their are more negatives then positives, maybe you should end it. So you can get some sleep at night :)

I know it's not as easy as it sounds, but is it worth the worry everytime he goes out?

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