Author Muznomer Posted June 21, 2023 Author Share Posted June 21, 2023 6 minutes ago, BaileyB said: I did not mean to be unkind. If you found that difficult to read, I am truly sorry. If you have found with this man the feeling of love, and respect, and support that you have previously not experienced in other relationships - why not use this experience as proof that it exists. Perhaps, that’s why this man has come into your life - to set you on the path to finding the true love of your life. The simple truth is - there is no lasting happiness to be found with another woman’s husband. I am not trying to minimise it - if I wanted reassurance that I’m doing the “right thing” I wouldn’t be posting here as said previously. Sometimes we need harshness to see the reality Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted June 21, 2023 Share Posted June 21, 2023 11 minutes ago, Muznomer said: I am not trying to minimise it - if I wanted reassurance that I’m doing the “right thing” I wouldn’t be posting here as said previously. Sometimes we need harshness to see the reality I know, I just truly want you to know that I was not trying to hurt you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Muznomer Posted June 21, 2023 Author Share Posted June 21, 2023 Just now, BaileyB said: I know, I just truly want you to know that I was not trying to hurt you. I know that so please don’t feel that way. I am really trying to find my way and yes I do agree with what you have posted. I love this man for what he has shown me a relationship can be like - not the rollercoaster but steady and full of love, care, respect even if it is a figment if my imagination Link to post Share on other sites
Author Muznomer Posted June 21, 2023 Author Share Posted June 21, 2023 50 minutes ago, Ageless Wisdom23 said: I am not seeing him divorce his wife. Nor leave his family. He may have issues in his marriage(health ones too)and finding you for Him, Was probably the best thing that has happened to him. He can more or Less, Have his cake and eat it two. He is surely cheating on her and cheating you out of having him to yours😔elf where he is yours alone. if you like this Situation, Who am I to judge? But she will always be Number One. Until Death Do They Part. Nor do I & yes I have enabled the situation by never asking for more or rocking the boat… Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted June 21, 2023 Share Posted June 21, 2023 (edited) 36 minutes ago, Muznomer said: I love this man for what he has shown me a relationship can be like - not the rollercoaster but steady and full of love, care, respect even if it is a figment if my imagination It’s not a figment of your imagination, it has been your experience in this relationship. You know this, but just because we have feelings for someone else does not entitle us to have a relationship with that person. The fact that you have developed a deep affection for the man doesn’t mean that you could, or even that you should, have a relationship with him. Unless you decide to dismiss your own needs indefinitely, you will ultimately have to make the decision one day to move on with your life because there are no other options and ultimately, it’s in your best interest to do so. As was said above, by asking you to stay involved in this affair he is cheating you out of the opportunity to find what he intends to keep/will not give up with his wife. That’s not fair. It’s not fair for him to ask you to sacrifice yourself in this way. Edited June 21, 2023 by BaileyB Link to post Share on other sites
Author Muznomer Posted June 22, 2023 Author Share Posted June 22, 2023 12 hours ago, BaileyB said: It’s not a figment of your imagination, it has been your experience in this relationship. You know this, but just because we have feelings for someone else does not entitle us to have a relationship with that person. The fact that you have developed a deep affection for the man doesn’t mean that you could, or even that you should, have a relationship with him. Unless you decide to dismiss your own needs indefinitely, you will ultimately have to make the decision one day to move on with your life because there are no other options and ultimately, it’s in your best interest to do so. As was said above, by asking you to stay involved in this affair he is cheating you out of the opportunity to find what he intends to keep/will not give up with his wife. That’s not fair. It’s not fair for him to ask you to sacrifice yourself in this way. I have been through so much over the past decade and I got through it. This is just another one of those mountains I need to climb and conquer Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted June 22, 2023 Share Posted June 22, 2023 1 hour ago, Muznomer said: I have been through so much over the past decade and I got through it. This is just another one of those mountains I need to climb and conquer What does that mean? You're ending the affair? You're going to get him to leave his wife? You will learn to compartmentalize more efficiently? I'm not getting the mountain climbing metaphor here. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Muznomer Posted June 22, 2023 Author Share Posted June 22, 2023 9 hours ago, NuevoYorko said: What does that mean? You're ending the affair? You're going to get him to leave his wife? You will learn to compartmentalize more efficiently? I'm not getting the mountain climbing metaphor here. I need to move on from this and I know it will be an uphill struggle - it’s not the easiest decision 😢 Link to post Share on other sites
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