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how to deal with angry daughter as I date after becoming a widow?


dealingwithangrydaughter

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dealingwithangrydaughter

I'm a widow for over a decade now and have had about 4 relationships since. Every time my adult daughter who is married to a wonderful guy interferes and tells me what's wrong with the person I'm seeing especially if the guy wants to get closer with me (i.e., talks of living together etc).

She did have some valid points in the past and now she objects to my current partner b/c she thinks he is inconsiderate and selfish which he can be on certain occasions. I did talk to him about it and he is really trying to change. I was ready to break up with him and he told me he'd do anything for me not to leave him so I'm giving him one more chance. He hasn't lied or done anything really bad but I can see my daughter's concerns that he is not the most generous person around (not just material stuff but also some manners); however, generally he treats me great and he also treats my adult son very well.

Last night she told me off when she learned we are spending the weekend together. She told me she is already stressed (she is having fertility issues) and me staying with my bf stresses her even more and if I stay with him she will need to set boundaries on our close relationship. I told her I need to live my own life and she said she isn't telling me what to do but she thinks I'm wasting my time and it will jeopardize my relationship with her.

I told her again I'm giving him a limited amount of time to address the concerns and I'd appreciate her understanding. She reiterated that I go from boyfriend to boyfriend and I can't be alone. Well, I can be alone but i don't like being alone...I really miss my late husband/her dad!!

Should I just stay the course with her or is there something else I can do? I feel guilty which I'm sure is one of her goals.

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39 minutes ago, dealingwithangrydaughter said:

She told me she is already stressed (she is having fertility issues) and me staying with my bf stresses her even more and if I stay with him she will need to set boundaries on our close relationship.

I would be inclined to tell her to go ahead and set her boundaries to fit her needs; but I'm going to lead my live the way I want.

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2 hours ago, dealingwithangrydaughter said:

 (i.e., talks of living together etc).She did have some valid points in the past and now she objects to my current partner b/c she thinks he is inconsiderate and selfish which he can be on certain occasions. 

Is this the same man who expects you to pay half his rent so you can visit him weekends?

Edited by Wiseman2
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