Anxious about the unknown

[Luuluu]

2 hours ago, glows said:

Hopefully he has a back up plan if things fall through. This is devastating to hear and I’m sorry about how things are going with the business. It’s good that you’re contributing to food. I would not contribute to the household as in furnishings and other items if it’s not your permanent residence.

I think it’s always a good idea to source a counsellor for ie on campus. Treat it as important as knowing where your nearest hospital or clinic is, where the shops are for food or a local dentist. If you need someone to talk to, on campus counselling can help and it’s often free for students. 

That is something I plan to do! With all these big changes I know I’ll need counseling to get through that period of adjustment. 

[Luuluu]

36 minutes ago, Els said:

Have you accepted your offer to the program, @Luuluu? If you are, congratulations and all the best to both of you.

It's normal for LDRs to require sacrifices on both sides in order to close the distance. Presumably, he isn't covering her tuition, only her room and board... and the whole reason why she is living with him to begin with is because she's moving away from her parents in order to close the distance. They are both making sacrifices and taking risks. It's fine if one or both of them decides that the risk isn't worth it, but in that case they might as well end the relationship now instead of prolonging it. I don't see it as "unfair" to him (or to her) if it doesn't work out, it's just a risk that you decide to take or not.

With all due respect, postponing her graduation date by years solely for the sake of this relationship sounds like a terrible idea. If she did this, she would be taking on 100% of the risk and he would be taking on 0%. With her current plan, the risk is about 50/50 (one person gives up their home and familial support system, the other person contributes more financially), which is much more equitable.

Yes I have accepted, thanks! Also, thanks for that last part you said, moving away while also figuring out where to live and how to sustain myself without income would be a disaster. Might as well take out 100k+ in loans. Some people seem to not understand that he is sacrificing too by me living with him. I could be a dependent on his taxes since he is supporting me in every other aspect (you are correct on tuition he is not paying that haha).