I am a waitress and a customer got angry because I was speaking to her boyfriend

[Yellowrose91]

I live in the states but I’m not from here originally and English isn’t my mother language. 

I am a waitress. A couple came into the restaurant. The man was from my home country ( I could tell by his name). We started to speak to eachother in our language. The woman wasn’t from our home country and couldn’t understand.

Throughout the night we’d speak to eachother in our own language, like if I came to the table, when he paid the bill etc. The woman started to look really angry, and I think it may have annoyed her. I spoke to her a little and tried to be nice but it was mostly the man I was speaking to in our language.

Was I wrong to do this? Should I have just sticked to English?

[basil67]

Yes, it was wrong....and he was wrong too.  It's one thing if one person needs to act as a translator, but as you have English, it very rude for both of you to deliberately leave her out of the conversation.  

[MsJayne]

Yes, it's extremely rude to converse in a language one of the parties to the conversation can't understand. Apart from the rudeness of excluding her from the conversation it would have come across as you trying to hit on her partner. Once as acknowledgment of a fellow countryman may have been excusable, but repeatedly throughout their meal was appalling behaviour from a waitress. If it was me I would have complained about you to the management right there and then. 

[Wiseman2]

22 minutes ago, Yellowrose91 said:

Should I have just sticked to English?

Yes. They're both customers at the restaurant and speaking to both of them in English is more appropriate.  It could have even been misconstrued as flirting which is also inappropriate. Hopefully the woman didn't complain to the management. 

[JTSW]

Yes, you began speaking the language which encouraged him to do the same.

I find it really rude when people speak another language leaving me out of the conversation.

It makes me feel paranoid that they are saying something about me.

Stick to English if that's what the job requires.

[Alpacalia]

Why did you purposely try to alienate his partner by speaking in your home language? That was a bit unsavory especially when it was evident that the woman wasn’t aware of what you were saying.

[ExpatInItaly]

Yes, it was rude and unprofessional of you.