Talking stage

[Roxanne200]

Hi! I’ve been texting back and forth with this guy that I’ve known since high school.Back then he had a crush on me but we went our separate ways and 9 yrs later he texted me saying he would like to meet up for coffee.We’ve been texting for about 4 days but yesterday he left me on read and didn’t say anything since.I really like him and can’t wait to meet him but I don’t want to seem desperate and text him.Is it possible that he lost interest already? He seemed really interested.Or am i just too dramatic and should wait lol

[Wiseman2]

1 hour ago, Roxanne200 said:

.We’ve been texting for about 4 days but yesterday he left me on read.Or am i just too dramatic and should wait.

Give it some time. A several hour pause in texting is fine.

[ExpatInItaly]

I wouldn't stress it.

When are you meeting for coffee? 

[Alpacalia]

Let him take the lead in confirming the plans. Give him the space to reply when he's comfortable. This approach allows him to express his interest in his own authentic manner.

[Gaeta]

I am always wary of men texting me after years. They have a tendency to do that when they just separated or a gf dropped them. If he doesn't get back to you then he was just seeking some attention. 

[Kassieee]

I don't think there's rules when it comes to things like this. If you want to know something just ask, if you want to continue the convo, text. Doesnt matter who texted last in my opinion. 

Edited August 30, 2023 by SlimShadysWife

[Roxanne200]

55 minutes ago, SlimShadysWife said:

I don't think there's rules when it comes to things like this. If you want to know something just ask, if you want to continue the convo, text. Doesnt matter who texted last in my opinion. 

I noticed even tho he always texts me first he also leaves me on read.Am i reading too much into it?😅

[Roxanne200]

3 hours ago, ExpatInItaly said:

I wouldn't stress it.

When are you meeting for coffee? 

That’s the thing.He asked me if I have any plans for the week,I said not much but he didn’t plan anything specific.

[NuevoYorko]

11 minutes ago, Roxanne200 said:

I noticed even tho he always texts me first he also leaves me on read.Am i reading too much into it?😅

Probably.  A texting conversation has to end somewhere and one of the people is the last on texting, so to speak.  Aren't they always "left on read" unless they conversation had a very formal closure?

[ExpatInItaly]

40 minutes ago, Roxanne200 said:

That’s the thing.He asked me if I have any plans for the week,I said not much but he didn’t plan anything specific.

So how did it come to pass that he asked you to meet for coffee? And what did you say in response? 

[Alpacalia]

It's not unusual for people to leave each other on read, so it's possible that he's just really busy or not able to look at his phone at the moment. Sometimes even if you like someone, you don't want to become complacent. If he's genuinely interested, he'll likely get back to you soon enough. Stay patient and receptive to his response. He took the initiative to suggest meeting, and you've responded in kind. Don't go bombarding him with messages if he's not responding.

Edited August 30, 2023 by Alpacalia

[Kassieee]

1 hour ago, Roxanne200 said:

I noticed even tho he always texts me first he also leaves me on read.Am i reading too much into it?😅

Yeah I think you are reading into it.

It's ok....You're excited. If you have something to say to him, or to share with him....just text it. If he's a cool guy he won't care. 

[Keeves1]

I think you are reading too much into it. He may left you on read because he was busy doing stuff and forgot to give you an answer. I would give it some time and wait until tomorrow. You could send him and message writing something like "Hey are we going to meet up for coffee later?"
 

[Roxanne200]

2 hours ago, ExpatInItaly said:

So how did it come to pass that he asked you to meet for coffee? And what did you say in response? 

I said it would be great to meet.Then he asked if I have any plans for the week and that’s about it.I’m still waiting for him to ask me properly😂😂

[Roxanne200]

1 hour ago, Alpacalia said:

It's not unusual for people to leave each other on read, so it's possible that he's just really busy or not able to look at his phone at the moment. Sometimes even if you like someone, you don't want to become complacent. If he's genuinely interested, he'll likely get back to you soon enough. Stay patient and receptive to his response. He took the initiative to suggest meeting, and you've responded in kind. Don't go bombarding him with messages if he's not responding.

I am the most excited since I’ve been in years about a date so I hope he will set it.😁

[Alpacalia]

Just now, Roxanne200 said:

I am the most excited since I’ve been in years about a date so I hope he will set it.😁

Chill woman! 

Talk is cheap.

When he says something and then does it, then you can start taking him more seriously. 

You are looking for a man with integrity who does what he says.

So see if he gets back to you and put him on do not read for now. 😉 

[Gaeta]

1 minute ago, Roxanne200 said:

I am the most excited since I’ve been in years about a date so I hope he will set it.😁

Why are you very excited about this?

[Roxanne200]

20 minutes ago, Gaeta said:

Why are you very excited about this?

Because I had a secret crush on him too back in high school.I kinda know him and he is my type😅 

[Roxanne200]

22 minutes ago, Alpacalia said:

Chill woman! 

Talk is cheap.

When he says something and then does it, then you can start taking him more seriously. 

You are looking for a man with integrity who does what he says.

So see if he gets back to you and put him on do not read for now. 😉 

You’re right.I will wait to see if his words match his actions.Thank you 😊

[Alpacalia]

3 minutes ago, Roxanne200 said:

You’re right.I will wait to see if his words match his actions.Thank you 😊

You're welcome. 

For someone that says they had a crush on you he is talking his time in letting you know. And look at you, you're salvating at the thought of him liking you. That's why it's important to be patient - because you have no idea what he is thinking. He could be some toothless blob now, for all you know. It's understandable that you are impatient and want to know how he feels, but you really need to be patient. If he is taking his time to get back to you, it's because of his own reasons.

I don't mean that as a jab towards you, not in the slightest, I'm just trying to help you keep your expectations in check and look at the bigger picture.

Edited August 30, 2023 by Alpacalia

[Gaeta]

2 minutes ago, Roxanne200 said:

Because I had a secret crush on him too back in high school.I kinda know him and he is my type😅 

You knew him 9 years ago. People change A LOT from 18 to 28. You need to take the excitement down a notch and judge him from how he treats you now. 

[Kassieee]

10 minutes ago, Roxanne200 said:

Because I had a secret crush on him too back in high school.I kinda know him and he is my type😅 

Since you kinda know him.

Do you think he's uppity about texting etiquette? Like personality wise, what's he like? Jerky? Laid back....? 

Edited August 30, 2023 by SlimShadysWife

[Roxanne200]

19 minutes ago, SlimShadysWife said:

Since you kinda know him.

Do you think he's uppity about texting etiquette? Like personality wise, what's he like? Jerky? Laid back....? 

He is quite laid back.

[JTSW]

Did you think for a minute that he could be in work and that's why he hasn't text for a few hours?

[NuevoYorko]

I've observed that most people here who post with concern about being "left on read" have been texting "all day every day" for a period and now that period is over.  Inevitably one of the people has grown tired of "all day every day" chatter.   

It doesn't mean they are tired of you.  You might still go on a date.  But as usual, I advise against getting into that kind of texting banter pattern in the first place.  It usually ends up with somebody feeling rejected.