Escort sent a follow request on insta after almost a year of no contact

[Maldives]

Hey all 

Haven't posted here for ages but have always gotten and appreciate the guidance and advice.

I'll give you some context first. So essentially last week this escort she's a ladyboy btw sent me a friend request on Instagram I hadn't heard from her for about 6 months actually but it essentially has been almost a year.

Now to give you some context. I did write about this before so I'll recap and then I'll tie it back into this follow request she sent on insta. I guess I'm seeking some clarity around this because till this point I was not even thinking about her or anything and put that behind me that experience it wasn't anything intense because we've never actually met.

Ok, I'll get into the initial story. So I followed her about a year ago on Instagram and there was some dialogue back and forth from her and I knew she was an escort because it says so on her profile and she had a only fans Link as well. So I was conscious of that and was a little bit hesitant to take it any further. I was just following her for her posts. Sexy posts lol. Anyway, she kept reaching out and wanted to do video calls and I started to catch some feelings for her. Nothing intense cos obviously we hadn't met but obviously she was very pretty and younger than me. Having said that,  I do look ok for someone who's just turned 52. 

Anyway, she was travelling from Adelaide to where I live on the Gold Coast in Australia which is interstate. It's about a 2 hr flight and we talked about meeting up. She was coming up here to escort so I was conscious of that but she kind of led me to believe there was something a little more happening with us and I thought I'll just give it a go even though she was doing their job one meet couldn't do any harm. I'll just meet for coffee. So I asked her for a coffee and was taken aback when she asked how long I wanted and basically it was going to cost money. So I made it clear to her that's not what I was looking for from her and that she led me to believe that this meant something more and told her never to contact me again.

So anyway that was that, the only other contact we had was maybe 6 months ago. I did spy on her stories once or twice. Maybe a couple of times and she obviously saw that and reached out then and said how come you still taking interest in my stories? And I just said it's because I'm curious and she responded saying that's ok because it actually shows me you're still interested in me and then I clarified and said no I'm not actually interested in going out with a working girl and she responded by saying and we call them hypocrites or something like that anyway and that was that and it ended there and I never looked at her stories ever again lol so that was about 6 months ago. Totally forgot about it. Never actually gave her much thought. Never looked at her posts on insta again and then last week I get a friend request from her on insta. Sorry a follow request. I accept it. Follow her back for a few days. She likes a few of my posts. I like a handful of hers. She never messages me or anything like that and I realised it was probably not a good idea after reading her post and comments from they must be some clients or something. So I unfollow her and then remove her from my follow list.

What it's done though. It's put her back centre in my head, its not intense or anything feeling wise for me but it's just got me scratching my head thinking what was the whole purpose of that when I made it clear to her to not contact me? Based on everything I mentioned above, I would be really interested for feedback from members on here what their take on this is. Was she interested in me genuinely not as a client? 

I have tried to Google her name and It appears she doesn't escort anymore. From what I can see I can't find her on any of the escort pages and she deleted her only fans page as well.

The only thing I could find was a thing called paid partnership on Instagram but anyone can set that up which is just like a paid per post agreement with a business associate like a influencer basically well, that's what it is an influencer. When I clicked on the account for the paid partnership it was just all her posts but it was somebody else communicating. Lol. Anyway, I couldn't make sense of it. I guess it's not important but I guess what I'm trying to get at is I'm not sure if she's still in that industry or not. Can't confirm. Not to take anything away from my initial question. What your thoughts are and why she follow requested me. My page is set to private on insta as so she has to send me a request and then I have to approve it

 

[Sony12]

She's trying to make a living. Of course she is going to follow up with people to see if they are still interested or have changed their mind.

[basil67]

The only way to know if she's actually given up working and is interested in dating you is to ask her.   That said, working girls can and do have boyfriends, so if she was interested in you, she would have dated you back then.   And also, if she wanted to date you now, she would have sent a message telling you that she's changed professions and asked if you're still interested.  So all in all, I doubt she's interested in dating you...it's far more likely that she's hoping you have changed your mind about hiring her services.

One tip: If you don't want to be contacted by someone, don't tell them not to contact you because they may not do as you ask.  Rather, it's up to you to block them.  

Edited September 5, 2023 by basil67

[Maldives]

2 minutes ago, Sony12 said:

She's trying to make a living. Of course she is going to follow up with people to see if they are still interested or have changed their mind.

Thanks for the reply I did make it very very clear to her I wasn't interested and never to contact me she knew I was effected by it in a negative way. 

[Maldives]

2 minutes ago, basil67 said:

The only way to know if she's actually given up working and is interested in dating you is to ask her.   That said, working girls can and do have boyfriends, so if she was interested in you, she would have dated you back then.   And also, if she wanted to date you now, she would have sent a message telling you that she's changed professions and asked if you're still interested.  So all in all, I doubt she's interested in dating you...it's far more likely that she's hoping you have changed your mind about hiring her services.

One tip: If you don't want to be contacted by someone, don't tell them not to contact you because they may not do as you ask.  Rather, it's up to you to block them.  

Yep that makes complete sense. I guess I didn't block her because initially I wanted some answers but afterwards I just forgot about it until I looked at a few of her stories once a few times that was it and just never bothered to look again after she reached out once 6 mths ago and just totally forgot about it and a long time had passed so I was surprised when I got the request. But that makes sense. 

[Wiseman2]

42 minutes ago, Goodguy05 said:

 Was she interested in me genuinely not as a client? I have tried to Google her name and It appears she doesn't escort anymore. 

I think you already know she's a working girl, so if you don't want to pay for virtual or live sex, you might as well delete and block her.

Edited September 5, 2023 by Wiseman2

[Maldives]

Stuff it I'm too old to stuff around with people's intentions  so I asked her just now direct why she sent me a follow request 

[basil67]

31 minutes ago, Goodguy05 said:

Stuff it I'm too old to stuff around with people's intentions  so I asked her just now direct why she sent me a follow request 

Are you hoping that she's now interested in dating you?

[Alvi]

She is probably low on customers at the moment. I doubt she would contact you if she was swapped. Can you blame her? I am still getting  e-mails and offers regularly from dealership that I got my car years ago.

1 hour ago, Goodguy05 said:

Having said that,  I do look ok for someone who's just turned 52. 

She still has to do a living even if you were in a terrible shape and a 100. It has absolutely nothing to do with your looks.

[Maldives]

10 minutes ago, basil67 said:

Are you hoping that she's now interested in dating you?

No I don't believe so I wasn't even thinking about her at all but her doing that has put her back in my mind so I just want to know why so I can know cause it's left me guessing and thinking about her now. It did stir up some feels but I quickly realised this wasn't good for me hence why I removed her from my Instagram. Even if she doesn't respond that's an answer for me. 

Edited September 5, 2023 by Goodguy05

[Alpacalia]

It's pretty obvious she played with your feelings, making you believe there was something deeper between you two when you'd clearly stated you weren't interested in any paid stuff. She kept pushing for it anyway, totally ignoring your boundaries.

Honestly, it's a long shot to think she's into you for real; it's more like she's fishing for some business.

Let's not be too trusting here. Maybe she's changed her ways, maybe she hasn't. No matter what, forget about her and don't let her use you as a source of money. 

[Maldives]

So she responded I asked why she requested to follow me and she replied she missed me. But it gets a lil odd from here, she begins to show me she's in a domestic violence incident with her partner and showed  me the avo which to me which was strange and her bruises which look like it happened begginning of August so think I'll stay clear of this one told her I was sorry that happened to her and will leave it at that. 

Edited September 6, 2023 by Goodguy05

[Maldives]

So I think I get it now she had that domestic violence incident a few weeks ago then here she is again so whatever the real reason is it's got something to do with that maybe support who knows but I believe it's tied in with that 

[ExpatInItaly]

Dude, come on. 

She sees you as a potential source of income. You need to give your head a good shake, and then do it again. You're approaching this as a dating prospect. I can nearly guarantee she isn't. You need to stop communicating with her if you are this easily in your feelings about a complete stranger,, let alone one in the line of work she is. 

 

Edited September 6, 2023 by ExpatInItaly

[ExpatInItaly]

@Goodguy05, please keep in mind that you are but one of many men she probably communicates with. I would bet my bottom dollar she's been sending other guys the exact same messages and looking for a  "rescuer."

How's your dating life been lately? I am wondering if you're in a dry spot or feeling a bit lonely. You seem to have attached a lot of thought and meaning to some messages from a woman who could probably care less about you and hardly differentiates you from any other potential clients. 

 

[Maldives]

I'll never part ways with cash I'm not that weak I get more  now why she's done the follow request ...anyone can say I miss you I get that obviously her words do not really match her actions accept one time she reached out 6 mths ago.. thanks all for the input appreciate much ☺️🙏

[ExpatInItaly]

You can't take any kind of "I miss you" seriously from soneone you have never met, anyway. 

Especially not someone who sees men like you as sources of income. She was likely just going back through old contacts and sent out feelers to all kinds of guys to see who would bite. Don't fall for it. 

[Maldives]

5 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said:

You can't take any kind of "I miss you" seriously from soneone you have never met, anyway. 

Especially not someone who sees men like you as sources of income. She was likely just going back through old contacts and sent out feelers to all kinds of guys to see who would bite. Don't fall for it. 

Thanks again no I definitely won't ..I know I probably should have blocked but one) I never heard from her for almost over a yr so last thing I was expecting was  a friend request which confused me lol. No harm done. 

[Acacia98]

I'm glad you found a satisfactory resolution to your query.

I just wanted to add that this person is highly manipulative (based solely on her interactions with you) and you come across as someone who takes people at face value. So even if you had met and started going out, it wouldn't have worked out. If you're looking for a relationship, you're better off pursuing women who experience the world and society as you do.

[Alvi]

Just block her.

[JTSW]

Ok, I'm not buying the 'domestic violence' claim at all.

It's a ploy to get money.

She will eventually start crying that she can't afford to escape her 'abusive relationship', so you will feel sorry for her and send her money.

[MsJayne]

Not intending to be a smarta**e, GoodGuy, but...you're a male living on the Gold Coast, (Australia's capital of Sleaze and Fake), and you nearly fell for this person? If you've ever spent an evening at Star Casino you should be able to spot a hard-nosed sex worker at 100 paces, and if you've ever actually listened to the back story of a sex worker you'd know that many of them despise men and have a ruthless attitude towards them. Sad that your person has apparently been beaten up, but my take is - this person is troubled and would bring trouble into your  life. Seriously, if you want to meet a woman who wants money for sex the GC is full of gold diggers prowling around looking for their next victim husband. They can be easily identified by their 'look' which usually involves all or some of the following - spray on tan, so much Botox they look like a balloon with a face drawn on it, bolt-on chest paid for by their last victim,  clothes that reveal a sizeable portion of the bolt-ons, empty eyes hidden behind false lashes, highly decorated talons. If you really want a stunning-but-financially-desperate woman take a stroll down to Palm Beach Centerlink and peruse the line-up . 

[Maldives]

13 hours ago, JTSW said:

Ok, I'm not buying the 'domestic violence' claim at all.

It's a ploy to get money.

She will eventually start crying that she can't afford to escape her 'abusive relationship', so you will feel sorry for her and send her money.

I wouldn't fall for it but it's actually real. She showed me her avo and her bruises. It's real. I do feel sorry for her. Nobody deserves that kind of treatment, but it's not a weakness in me where I would hand over money because of something like that. I can feel sorry for her but not necessarily at my own expense. I'm not weak. I'm not. But there was definitely a case of violence against her. Poor thing but yeah nobody deserves physical abuse that's for sure. 

Edited September 7, 2023 by Goodguy05

[Maldives]

1 hour ago, MsJayne said:

Not intending to be a smarta**e, GoodGuy, but...you're a male living on the Gold Coast, (Australia's capital of Sleaze and Fake), and you nearly fell for this person? If you've ever spent an evening at Star Casino you should be able to spot a hard-nosed sex worker at 100 paces, and if you've ever actually listened to the back story of a sex worker you'd know that many of them despise men and have a ruthless attitude towards them. Sad that your person has apparently been beaten up, but my take is - this person is troubled and would bring trouble into your  life. Seriously, if you want to meet a woman who wants money for sex the GC is full of gold diggers prowling around looking for their next victim husband. They can be easily identified by their 'look' which usually involves all or some of the following - spray on tan, so much Botox they look like a balloon with a face drawn on it, bolt-on chest paid for by their last victim,  clothes that reveal a sizeable portion of the bolt-ons, empty eyes hidden behind false lashes, highly decorated talons. If you really want a stunning-but-financially-desperate woman take a stroll down to Palm Beach Centerlink and peruse the line-up . 

Lol had a good giggle with your post ☺️I don't know when you came last to Gold Coast but it's changed a bit the white shoe brigade has gone lol. Just a FYI for everyone. I am not getting involved with her. Don't worry, no need to worry. I've got this. 

The reason I posted was i was confused why she sent me a friend request but when I actually messaged her directly and what eventuated from that message back and forth with her I got my answer. So it's all clear now. So I'm all good guys.  truly I am.. plus all the feedback here 

Edited September 7, 2023 by Goodguy05

[MsJayne]

3 hours ago, Goodguy05 said:

I don't know when you came last to Gold Coast but it's changed a bit the white shoe brigade has gone lol.

Yep, but their white shoe footprint is still there. Many years ago I worked for Big Chief White Shoe himself, Keith Williams, bean-counting his billions. Oh, the shame 😔😂. Now they've been replaced by dodgy developers. One day the Spit will be lined with glass and concrete high-rises even if it means they have to pay off every single politician within a zillion k radius. I sold my house there six months ago and retired to the peace and tranquility of the Southern Moreton Bay Islands, (I'm looking at North Straddie from my window right now). Ah, the serenity . You're right though, the GC's image is slowly changing, but there'll always be a bit of Candy-Man-ish-ness lurking in the background.