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What does she mean by this?


siren8272

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My mom was trying to set me up with some dude I did not think was my type and when i told her as much she proceeded with a speech about if she was my age(im 41 btw shes 71) shed run circles around me. I told her no she wouldnt because I dont compete for male attention...she was pissed. What was her point in saying this? I have no doubt in my mind my mom is a "pick me" and would have tried to compete , but she like most women I run into like this end up confused as can be because again I dont compete for male attention ...I never have. So what did she mean? What was her point? Why even think this 🤦‍♂️?

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Run circles around you means she thinks she would have done things better, that’s all. She’s basically saying she’d date better. It’s a mild dig. Don’t think it means anything about competing for male attention specifically. 

Why does she want to set you up? Are you even looking for a relationship? 

Family can get overly involved without good boundaries. Simply say your love life is off limits and thank her for her concern. Change the topic. Set up your own dates.

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Don't worry about it. Your mom may have been trying to make a point, but ultimately it is her opinion and you don't need to feel any pressure to conform to her standards. Everyone likes different things, and you do not let anyone else try to define what you consider to be your ideal type of person. Trust what you think and feel comfortable in the knowledge that you know what you like. No one is saying that you have to do anything against your will or tastes, so don't worry about it.

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She meant she would be doing way better than you if you and her came head to head. Kinda gross she's comparing herself to you in that way. Really out of line for a mother to be saying that to a daughter. And the audacity of her to be pissed at you. 

I have a mother similar, she is reckless with her mouth. After continously warning her to stop talking to me a certain way, and treating me a certain way- and she did not. I just stopped talking to her, ignored her for a solid week and her tone with me changed. I think she needed time to reflect. I think you need to talk to her calmly and tell her how you feel when she says things like that.

Edited by SlimShadysWife
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15 hours ago, siren8272 said:

My mom was trying to set me up with some dude I did not think was my type 

All you can do is refrain from discussing your dating and love life with your mother. Especially if she tends to be meddlesome and judgemental and trying to marry you off. She's not going to change. Just create and maintain boundaries regarding your personal life.

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15 hours ago, siren8272 said:

when i told her as much she proceeded with a speech about if she was my age(im 41 btw shes 71) shed run circles around me.

Sounds like she's talking about your energy level to me.  I know when my mother was my age she certainly could run circles around me.

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