Relationship and Life Inventory

[Sloppy]

Hey guys!

I was wondering how your last breakup affected your life.

Have you learned from it?

Have you become a better or worse person?

Have you taken the time to do an 'inventory', or did you jump straight to another relationship to make coping easier?

 

My last break-up was the hardest thing I have experienced on emotional level. I have had few chances to jump into a rebound relationship, but this time felt very different. I decided to suffer through everything full blast, to wait it out, to learn from it and see what life brings. It turned out to be one of the best decisions I have made.

I have read many things I wrote years ago and I did relationships and life inventory. I found some amazing patterns I follow; the same patterns that get me in situations that are very unhealthy.

I realized that I have never been alone (either always in relationship, or had a crush on someone).

So in shortcut I realized that I have been a very emotionally unhealthy individual that only attracts unhealthy partners. I always felt incomplete unless I was in a relationship. Now I realize that I need to become a complete and complex person to be able to have a healthy relationship.

Now I know that if someone comes to me and says: "Here, take me and f

ix me", I will run my butt off

So once again, even though this break-up was extremelly hard and painful for me, I believe that it has been the best thing that could have happened to me at this time.

I am taking the time to discover who the heck I am and what I want, I am learning to be in peace with my self, to love my self, and to love and respect others for who they are.

I posted this thread in 'Second Chances', because I have a second chance in life and I'm grabbing it. No more NC with reality for me!

What are your stories?

[Raven9595]

The only break up that really effected my life was one of 10yrs ago and I still am not over it

 

Have you learned from it? That if you find someone special to cherish them and tret them how you want to be treated.

 

Have you become a better or worse person? I have become a much better person!

 

Have you taken the time to do an 'inventory', or did you jump straight to another relationship to make coping easier? No, have a few flings then settled in to a relationship when I found the right person.

 

I may not be the best person to answer your post since me ex still occupies large part of my heart, one thing I can tell you if you find a good woman, she will love you, accept you, add to your life in many ways including helping to figure out who you are...

[Sloppy]

I hope I will get to the point that I will not need anyone to help me to figure out who I am. I will meet many people throughout my life whom I can learn from, but if I were to enter a relationship, I want to know that I am ME and that I know it.

Yes, people / spouses might contribute to the final process, but I have been in many relationships already just to figure out that I had become who THEY WANTED ME TO BE.

Each situation is different just like we are all different. I feel that being alone until I feel complete (to a certain point, I hope I always keep searching and learning) and happy with my life is the only way for me.

i also hope that my ex stays in my heart for a looooong time (if not forever). I respect him as a person and I have learned a lot...thanks to him.