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My husband's friend's wife hates me


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7 hours ago, NuevoYorko said:

Maybe you need to backtrack a little bit.   

You might start with dating like others your age do, instead of hanging out partying at a drug dealer's house. 

You know, going out to dinner, shows,  spending time together in either of your homes.  Getting to know each others' families.    See if you and the man actually have what it takes to be in a serious committed relationship.  If that's the case then gradually introduce your children and see if there is potential to form a blended family.

If so, perhaps the next step would be to decide to live together, and then consider marriage if you both feel like that's the right step for you.

After that perhaps try to conceive a child, though it will be challenging at your age.  

The woman you hate so much is your age peer, so if you and this man actually develop a serious, mature and lasting relationship, she certainly wouldn't be an appropriate surrogate.  

Not to mention that you hate her guts so virulently. 

Good luck.

I don’t go there, he does. He’s got a proper job too that bloke just doesn’t obviously needs help affording his house. 

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54 minutes ago, Betty8 said:

No, I’d like to just avoid her 

Putting my kind hat on: she's offered to be a surrogate and I can't imagine her offering this if she hates you.   

Putting my skepical hat on: As your partner is hot for her, it's not out of the question that she's hot for him too.  So perhaps offering surrogacy is her way of getting sex with him.   How are you OK with him having the hots for a woman who you dislike so much?  

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5 minutes ago, basil67 said:

Putting my kind hat on: she's offered to be a surrogate and I can't imagine her offering this if she hates you.   

Putting my skepical hat on: As your partner is hot for her, it's not out of the question that she's hot for him too.  So perhaps offering surrogacy is her way of getting sex with him.   How are you OK with him having the hots for a woman who you dislike so much?  

I’m undecided honestly. I think it’s like she wants his baby now ffs or has changed her angle for control from where is she, to ok well maybe I’ll offer them a baby to feel in control. I don’t think you can help who you are attracted to but I am concerned that he hasn’t raised the publicly her behaviour as they may have an inappropriate emotional relationship and think that means they are doing nothing wrong. Although I hasten to add her husband is always there and they don’t meet separately ever. 
 

is it kind? Is it fuvk after how she’s been for three years 

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4 minutes ago, basil67 said:

Putting my kind hat on: she's offered to be a surrogate and I can't imagine her offering this if she hates you.   

Putting my skepical hat on: As your partner is hot for her, it's not out of the question that she's hot for him too.  So perhaps offering surrogacy is her way of getting sex with him.   How are you OK with him having the hots for a woman who you dislike so much?  

I think both of his friends the couple are dominant and it seems will do almost anything to feel they still are. I think they are both quite pathetic honestly 

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5 minutes ago, Betty8 said:

Although I hasten to add her husband is always there and they don’t meet separately ever. 

That you know of

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4 minutes ago, Betty8 said:

 they may have an inappropriate emotional relationship 

Please try not to obsess about this woman. Your BF is the problem if he's too cozy with her. Please don't move yourself and your daughter into his house. You don't trust him and there's too much jealousy and turbulence as a result. 

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14 minutes ago, Betty8 said:

is it kind? Is it fuvk after how she’s been for three years 

Um ... you've only known this "husband" of yours for 2 years though.

Quote

I met who I felt was the love of my life two years ago.

I think you're getting pretty mixed up here.

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13 minutes ago, NuevoYorko said:

Um ... you've only known this "husband" of yours for 2 years though.

I think you're getting pretty mixed up here.

It’s 5 but anyway sure you know 

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43 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Please try not to obsess about this woman. Your BF is the problem if he's too cozy with her. Please don't move yourself and your daughter into his house. You don't trust him and there's too much jealousy and turbulence as a result. 

Could it not be what he says they’ve both been his friends for many years ? Albeit this woman has made it v complicated now. I do question why he’d just share everything with her, but he seems to struggle to have a filter 

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45 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Please try not to obsess about this woman. Your BF is the problem if he's too cozy with her. Please don't move yourself and your daughter into his house. You don't trust him and there's too much jealousy and turbulence as a result. 

I’m most interested now to know if they have met up and if her husband is aware of everything said 

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15 hours ago, Betty8 said:

It’s 5 but anyway sure you know 

Did you notice that I quoted the first line you posted on this epic thread?   That was back in the days when he was your "husband" though.  Times have changed.

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14 hours ago, Betty8 said:

Could it not be what he says they’ve both been his friends for many years ? Albeit this woman has made it v complicated now. I do question why he’d just share everything with her, but he seems to struggle to have a filter 

You said that you don't mind him having a crush on her.  This is just the natural fallout from the crush...especially if it's mutual.   She's not the only one making it complicated as your partner is absolutely complicit in the closeness between them.   

It's not going to stop until he pulls away from that group.  

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