LWelter Posted October 24, 2023 Share Posted October 24, 2023 I've been seeing a girl for all of 3 weeks. It was going so well, there was a clear connection from the off, which is something I haven't had in years. She said how her head had been in the clouds since we met, how she found herself smiling to herself afterwards. Very suddenly, she started to become standoffish via message, but when we met everything was great as usual. Then in the last couple of days in particular, she's been especially distant. I didn't want to come across as needy, so I just asked her if everything is okay. She then said she didn't want to "lead me down the garden path" and that she had a great time over the last few weeks, but was ending it. She also said there's someone else involved. I have a feeling this is her ex. I'm just on here to vent really. I've met so many people on dating apps etc over the last 3 years, and was really confident I'd finally met someone I was looking for. It was really incredible how similar we were, how much we had in common. I'm a more introverted person but we could talk for hours. To have it end before it started is very hard to take. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted October 24, 2023 Share Posted October 24, 2023 (edited) 14 minutes ago, LWelter said: She also said there's someone else involved. I have a feeling this is her ex. To have it end before it started is very hard to take. Sorry this happened. Was she talking about the ex or a recent breakup? Were there any other red flags? Unfortunately some people jump on dating apps a nanosecond after a breakup or argument. Sadly this women seems to have been looking for a distraction. The only silver lining is that she told you sooner rather than later and didn't ghost. Hopefully it doesn't discourage you from continuing to date. Edited October 24, 2023 by Wiseman2 Link to post Share on other sites
MsJayne Posted October 24, 2023 Share Posted October 24, 2023 I'd say your feelings are probably correct, the ex has reappeared. Bow out with dignity, and when they break up again you either will still be available or you won't if she chooses to contact you. At least three weeks isn't long enough for the experience to do any lasting damage to you, it's more disappointment than broken heart so you'll recover quickly. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LWelter Posted October 24, 2023 Author Share Posted October 24, 2023 9 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said: Sorry this happened. Was she talking about the ex or a recent breakup? Were there any other red flags? Unfortunately some people jump on dating apps a nanosecond after a breakup or argument. Sadly this women seems to have been looking for a distraction. The only silver lining is that she told you sooner rather than later and didn't ghost. Hopefully it doesn't discourage you from continuing to date. No red flags when we were together, it was really great between us. The red flag was her being distant over the last week or so by message. We didn't talk about her ex, and I don't even know for sure it's him, but I'm guessing that's the case... Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 25, 2023 Share Posted October 25, 2023 I'm sorry this didn't work out. That sucks. But obviously you didn't know her as well as you thought you did. Link to post Share on other sites
BreakOnThrough Posted October 26, 2023 Share Posted October 26, 2023 A tale as old as time... Link to post Share on other sites
Author LWelter Posted October 26, 2023 Author Share Posted October 26, 2023 Wasn't her ex after all apparently! It was someone she'd met in person before we'd met, who apparently had since let her know he liked her and she wants to explore it. Difficult to be 2nd best after in the week beforehand she'd said her head was in the coulds, she was smiling to herself when we weren't together, she couldn't wait to see me. It's sad that even if it didn't work out with this other person, I don't see how I could accept her coming back knowing she chose someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LWelter Posted October 28, 2023 Author Share Posted October 28, 2023 All I want to do is message her telling her how much I miss her, how she's made a massive mistake, how I'm heartbroken. I've never met a girl like her in my life, she's the purest, warmest person I've ever met. Within 3 hours of meeting her I could tell she had nothing but love to give. This is tough! Link to post Share on other sites
Author LWelter Posted October 28, 2023 Author Share Posted October 28, 2023 All I want to do is tell her I'm in love with her Link to post Share on other sites
Logic10 Posted November 3, 2023 Share Posted November 3, 2023 Don't do it. You will regret it big time. If anything, she will come crawling back if things don't work out with her new guy. You will initially be excited, but in the end you won't want her anymore because she chose someone else over you. That would bother you. Just focus on yourself and you'll meet someone else. You only knew her for a short time so you're still high off of that honeymoon phase. She has her faults. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted November 3, 2023 Share Posted November 3, 2023 On 10/28/2023 at 2:45 PM, LWelter said: All I want to do is tell her I'm in love with her Please don't debase yourself this way. It won't bring her back. It will chase her farther away. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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