Haven't officially met her.

[glows]

18 minutes ago, Alan said:

Even to make a friend in my own apartment complex. Just a friend is hard to make these days. But I try to be optimistic. Yes I will steer clear of those things that are illegal etc. Most of my neighbors show signs they have addictions. And I avoid them. I just want to have intellectual friends sometimes but seemed easier to find like ten years ago. 

You’ll definitely have better luck meeting someone more intellectually on your level at interest groups. You’ll be able to meet under similar interests and have more to talk about that way instead of hoping someone is friendly back to you at a supermarket or gym. 

I hope you’re not staring or being too obvious checking out the women in yoga pants at the gym. Everyone looks, just don’t be that person that’s staring everyone down or making people feel self-conscious. 

Volunteering in the community is a great way to be involved and also give back in areas that interest you while meeting others. 

[d0nnivain]

Are there any colleges / universities around you?  Can you go on campus & attend lectures to meet like minded intellectuals?   What about joining a book club?  

[ShyViolet]

It doesn't even matter so much whether this woman was a catfish/scammer, or a genuine person.  You never talk about marriage, having kids, moving in together, buying a home together, with someone who you met online, who you've only been texting, who you haven't met in person yet.  Even if you had met them in person and gone on a few dates, it's still inappropriate and irresponsible to talk about those things at that point, when you barely know a person.  No emotionally mature person does that.  You need to learn how to approach dating like a mature adult, and this isn't it.

[BaileyB]

12 hours ago, ShyViolet said:

You never talk about marriage, having kids, moving in together, buying a home together, with someone who you met online, who you've only been texting, who you haven't met in person yet.  Even if you had met them in person and gone on a few dates, it's still inappropriate and irresponsible to talk about those things at that point, when you barely know a person.  

This was exactly what I was going to say.

You say that you don’t like drama, but you have chosen exactly that when you’ve chosen to talk with this woman. 

I say run, don’t walk, away from this person. Block. Delete. Move on… And next time a woman that you have never met starts talking about moving in together and having children with you - that is a HUGE red flag that is not to be ignored. 

[CaliforniaGirl]

On 11/29/2023 at 2:32 PM, Alan said:

It's been 3 days now. She lives like 24 miles away from me. She didn't talk to me last night. It seemed she blew me off. She said she has a lease for three years. But I did see another profile of hers.  I don't know how a teacher could go broke. I will be careful. I have run into scammers in the past. I know most of their tactics. This one seemed sincere.  Usually the ones I meet ask for gift card codes or ask for pictures to trade. This one seemed desperate to move into a condo or house. She said she would pay half. If I paid other half. I've been smart and never give money or private things. I had a friend that was stupid and gave money. I even warned her. 

RUN. She has no use for you except to tell you she needs money. Run run run.