1_T Posted December 18, 2023 Share Posted December 18, 2023 Me: Hi Ai, how long have you been on OkCupid, I recently joined, and I am hoping to find someone who is looking for a relationship as seriously as I am. Ai: Hello Sunny, thank you for messaging me. How are you doing? What do I say next to Ai? Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted December 18, 2023 Share Posted December 18, 2023 2 minutes ago, 1_T said: What do I say next to Ai? "Why don't we meet for coffee/a drink next week? When would you like to meet?" Texting is not dating. Dating is dating. Link to post Share on other sites
MsJayne Posted December 18, 2023 Share Posted December 18, 2023 What do you mean by Ai? Do you mean you're contemplating continuing a conversation with a computer-generated identity? Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted December 18, 2023 Share Posted December 18, 2023 "Why did the chicken cross the road?" 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1_T Posted December 18, 2023 Author Share Posted December 18, 2023 17 hours ago, MsJayne said: What do you mean by Ai? Do you mean you're contemplating continuing a conversation with a computer-generated identity? Ai is the name the potential girlfriend claims to be called. Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted December 18, 2023 Share Posted December 18, 2023 I'm sorry to be blunt, but if you really have nothing more to say to a person than what you posted, you need more help than you're going to get here. I can tell you that "looking for a relationship" is pretty meaningless. The point is for you to get to know whether you and someone else would be compatible. Just because you and this "AI" person may both be interested in finding love does not mean that you two would find it with each other. Ask some questions about them and let them know some things about you. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted December 18, 2023 Share Posted December 18, 2023 24 minutes ago, 1_T said: Ai is the name the potential girlfriend claims to be called. Is this potential girlfriend real? Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted December 18, 2023 Share Posted December 18, 2023 19 hours ago, 1_T said: Ai: Hello Sunny, thank you for messaging me. How are you doing? It's great you got a positive response. Please don't waste time thinking of clever text banter. The biggest mistake people make in OLD is too much emphasis on mindless chitchat before meeting in person to assess in-person chemistry and rapport. Ask her out, it's that simple. Link to post Share on other sites
Foxhall Posted December 18, 2023 Share Posted December 18, 2023 (edited) Id agree in principle with wiseman there; I know I was at online dating a fairly long time and eventually I just got sick of the online banter because it was a completely different scenario then in person, however if you are quite novicey at it all, maybe it is no harm to have an exchange for a while online before you actually meet. Its over five years ago (how the time flies) since I was last online but one thing I remember , it was always a little harder for the girl to meet- they needed a little reassurance or rapport with the person before they met face to face, I get the sense the chit chat or small talk is not something which may come that easy to you, and with that in mind it can be useful to practice a little of that with online chat , star signs and personality tests are two topics I have always found women like to talk about and they can be useful as icebreakers- even read up your own knowledge of those and be able to hold a conversation on them, and its meant to be enjoyable- even the online get to know you stuff- so maybe try and relax and enjoy it more and who knows where that may lead. Edited December 18, 2023 by Foxhall grammar correction Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1_T Posted December 18, 2023 Author Share Posted December 18, 2023 1 hour ago, basil67 said: Is this potential girlfriend real? I am not completely sure if this potential girlfriend is real because we did not meet in person yet. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted December 19, 2023 Share Posted December 19, 2023 (edited) The reason you don't know what to say in response to "how are you doing?" is because it's a greeting and not a proper question. Also she's a poor conversationalist. A person who is interested and able to hold up their end of a conversation will say "how are you doing?" and then immediately follow that comment with a proper question. If a guy responded with nothing more than "how are you doing?" I could say "I'm good thanks....I noticed that you like X in your profile, it looks like fun! how long have you been doing that? But I wouldn't actually do it because I'm not going to date someone who can't hold up their end of the conversation from the outset. Edited December 19, 2023 by basil67 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted December 19, 2023 Share Posted December 19, 2023 48 minutes ago, 1_T said: I am not completely sure if this potential girlfriend is real because we did not meet in person yet. That's another great reason to suggest meeting sooner rather than later. It helps rule out catfish, scammers and timewasters. Anyone who won't meet in a timely manner is a red flag. Link to post Share on other sites
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