Author Placebeyondthepines Posted March 31 Author Share Posted March 31 (edited) 28 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said: What exactly do you mean by this? You've said this a couple times but I don't get what you are trying to say. Did you two not talk like normal human beings before? Nop, we hooked up on IG. We've been in eachothers list for a few years now, but never talked proper. We've started after I've responded to a story she had and we kicked it super instantly and natural. Knew her company, but never noticed her or interacted, just via other people. Then when we talked, she described that we've actually been around each other in a club two years ago. And she described the night really in details, where I was and who I was with (my ex). That was awkward for me, but logically was that she noticed me and I made a mark, right? Who remember that if not saw something she liked? So, my interaction with her, it felt natural and wanted to leave a door open, not for something later, but because of how we spent building our interaction. Also, I was thinking after that night, we've meet via work in a project. It would be supeeer awkward and problematic for me. Edited March 31 by Placebeyondthepines Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted March 31 Share Posted March 31 2 hours ago, Placebeyondthepines said: Nop, we hooked up on IG. I meant in the time you had started going on dates with her. Not how you met. You two never spoke normally when you were dating? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Placebeyondthepines Posted March 31 Author Share Posted March 31 Just now, ExpatInItaly said: I meant in the time you had started going on dates with her. Not how you met. You two never spoke normally when you were dating? Ah, ok. We did of course. It was all sunshine. She died laughing. All the ingredients of a recipe we've seen before. It didn't work, it happens, but can we still work as people? That was what I wanted to find out, but it was hard. I didn't wanted to be friendzoned, both made a step back and so on. I wanted to meet her live to see the vibe. That was it. If it felt bad, I would have move backwards, but eventually it seems I did. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted April 1 Share Posted April 1 10 hours ago, Placebeyondthepines said: It didn't work, it happens, but can we still work as people? What does this even mean? Nebulous plans to be "work as people" doesn't make sense here. You aren't exactly friends with a long history who had much worth hanging on to. You can be polite if you bump into her but it won't serve you to try to be friends who hang out and talk. Work on letting go altogether. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Placebeyondthepines Posted April 1 Author Share Posted April 1 Just now, ExpatInItaly said: What does this even mean? Nebulous plans to be "work as people" doesn't make sense here. You aren't exactly friends with a long history who had much worth hanging on to. You can be polite if you bump into her but it won't serve you to try to be friends who hang out and talk. Work on letting go altogether. Yeah, I usually am polite and I can do that, I was curious if she can. Look, on our third date, while taking her to get an Uber, we've met a guy on the street, randomly, that was/is the boyfriend of one of her best friends. She barely said hello, he wanted to engage, but she ignored him completely. I understood she didn't like him, but was odd. Saw his face when she walked passed him. So, imagine I have to meet her job wise fast forward in the future. I wanted to know if we can talk normal, or she would be awkward and maybe make things difficult for me, job wise, because of our encounter. That is what I meant most of all by: talking like normal humans. It makes mores sense now? Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted April 1 Share Posted April 1 Just now, Placebeyondthepines said: It makes mores sense now? Not really. You are really over-thinking a random encounter she had with someone you know she doesn't like. That doesn't have anything to do with you, and you currently have no reason to believe she will make things difficult for you at work. You are tryig to draw comparisons between two situations that in reality are totally unrelated. She doesn't seem to have any animosty towards you. I am sure she's fine with you. You don't need to smooth the waters any further here. Just let it be. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Placebeyondthepines Posted April 1 Author Share Posted April 1 I think you are right. I mean you are right. I think it comes from the fact when we talked, as mentioned, she kinda washed her hands and acted like it was all me. And surely, got me over-thinking it of what kind of person she might be. But it will pass. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Placebeyondthepines Posted April 28 Author Share Posted April 28 Hello guys, a short update. Things have been good lately, focused a lot on work and on myself. Event went out a few times with different women, but went just to chat and have a drink, nothing else. Stayed a lot with myself also and it's better, a lot better. You were right, not meeting her was a very, very smart move. Gave me time to move on from it and realize I don't need this drama. But the funny part is she broke the no contact this week and tried to find reasons to talk to me. I had a business meeting on monday and went to a bar with some clients and looked really good that day and I am 100% convince she saw me that night because on the same place was a concert she told me a lot about when we were dating. I gaved her only short answers and have no desire to meet her at all. So thank you, your advices made a difference, my b-day is coming up soon so I will raise a glass for you lot. Link to post Share on other sites
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