That girlie Posted February 11 Share Posted February 11 I have been talking to this guy on and off for a few weeks. He admitted to having feelings for me and I did also, but said he doesn’t wanna progress things further. We’ve entered kind of a situationship now and he’s said that in 4 months (he finishes uni then) that things will be different. I tried questioning him on what he meant but didn’t get an answer. I went out clubbing one night and I sent him a voice note when I got back at around 4am to say hi as I was drunk and that I got back alright. He usually goes out on the same night as me but didn’t this time. In the voice note my male flatmate spoke. I tried talking to him the next day to apologise for the voice note as it was random and at 4am when he was asleep. I also asked if I could see him before I go away on holiday, I got no response. I said that it didn’t matter in the evening and he texted me back being very hostile and said “didn’t you literally have a guy in your bed last night”. This wasn’t the case so I sent a few angry messages back telling him not to make accusations like that and that it was just my flatmate. He opened the messages a day after me sending them and never replied. I messaged him again and am yet to receive a response. How do I go about this? I’ve explained myself yet I cannot get a response from him. He’s been on social media and hasn't opened my messages. Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted February 11 Share Posted February 11 There's no need for you to explain yourself to him. You're not in an exclusive, committed relationship and the man you're dating can't expect you to put your life on hold. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 11 Share Posted February 11 Why do you want a response? This man is not your BF, he's your nothing. Maybe you two are FWB but that is about it. He has made it clear that you are unimportant to him. So what if you drunk dialed him & your male roommate could be heard on the message. Unless the roommate was saying "get back in bed @That girlie his voice on the message is meaningless. This guy overreacted & was rude about it. Seriously he says he doesn't have time or whatever to go out with you, yet he has time to talk to you & go out with his buddies. He's telling you by those actions that you don't matter. Stop chasing him. The only thing that was gonna happen in 4 months when he graduates is he will move away for a job then tell you he's too tired from work to be with you. He's wasting your time. Stop caring. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted February 11 Share Posted February 11 The only thing you need to do is assert yourself and be clear that his comments are not welcome or appreciated. If he continues to be hostile and make accusations, it might be best to distance yourself from him. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted February 12 Share Posted February 12 Try to avoid him as much as possible and delete and block him and all his people from ALL your social media and messaging apps. He's just toying with you for possible hook-up material. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted February 13 Share Posted February 13 He's full of it. If you had had a guy over your place and in your bed would you be sending a voice note at 4am to say hi? No, sending him that message at 4am is asking for a booty call and why would you need one if you already have a man in your bed. He used that flimsy excuse to get rid of you. On 2/11/2024 at 8:25 AM, That girlie said: How do I go about this? I’ve explained myself yet I cannot get a response from him. He’s been on social media and hasn't opened my messages. There's nothing to go about. He doesn't want to give you a response and doesn't owe you one because he is not your boyfriend. He's moved on. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted February 15 Share Posted February 15 A guy doesn't message back because he doesn't want to. Anyone can say they have feelings for you, doesn't mean they actually do. Bottom line, guys will do and say anything to get sex or just keep you on the hook if something better doesn't come along. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
FredEire Posted February 16 Share Posted February 16 (edited) Meh. It sounds like he was only looking to casual date anyway. Projecting some change in 4 months isn't something a guy would say to a potential girlfriend. Going off on you about the message may have been his way of cleanly ending something that was going to end anyway, whether it was conscious or not. I'd take it for what it was and move on. Edited February 16 by FredEire Link to post Share on other sites
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