MsJayne Posted February 14, 2024 Share Posted February 14, 2024 On 2/14/2024 at 4:31 AM, Callmekitty said: I feel very confused why I am suddenly being ghosted. Is he just not interested, is he trying to play games or does he like to stay in control of our dynamic? Any thoughts? Some context: he generally likes to leave the conversation. Usually, I brush it off as the conversation naturally ending. I do notice that when try to I end the conversation, he brings up a new topic so I am not the one who left. Sounds like his ego was butt-hurt when you ended things and he's clawing back some power. Don't block him or unfriend him, wait for the next time he messages you, and just leave him on 'read' forever. Link to post Share on other sites
Acacia98 Posted February 14, 2024 Share Posted February 14, 2024 23 minutes ago, Callmekitty said: I’ve muted and restricted him so I don’t need to see his updates. However he can still see mine. On the one hand I want to be able to show that I am fine and he is missing something great, on the other seeing him watch all my stories and not respond bothers me a lot (but then I don’t want him to notice that). I guess a part of me is hoping he wil come back with an apology and explanation. But from discussing it with you all it seems like that’s probably going to remain a fantasy… It sounds like this is all rather unhealthy. The kindest thing you can do for him and for yourself is to block him. That way, you'll both be forced to move on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted February 14, 2024 Share Posted February 14, 2024 58 minutes ago, Callmekitty said: We met up a while ago for the first time and it was quite pleasant though a bit shallow. Was he the one who asked to get together that time or did you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Callmekitty Posted February 15, 2024 Author Share Posted February 15, 2024 (edited) 4 hours ago, stillafool said: Was he the one who asked to get together that time or did you? I had casually proposed to meet up for coffee or lunch. He then started sharing dates when he was in NY. He was very keen; he once messaged me out of the blue “are you in the city next week by any chance?”. Eventually asked me for lunch on a specific date when we found an overlapping period. When I told him I would circle back to see if I could make that day with work he grew colder and started tapering. Eventually I had to check in to see if the date was still on a few days in advance because I wasn’t hearing from him. When he replied, he was very apologetic and said it was because he was still figuring out his schedule. That seemed strange as he was so clear on exact dates earlier. Edited February 15, 2024 by Callmekitty Link to post Share on other sites
Author Callmekitty Posted February 15, 2024 Author Share Posted February 15, 2024 (edited) He had paid for lunch and I offered to take him for a drink later that week in return. He couldn’t make that with his work but we agreed to stay in touch to meet again if we were in the same town. It’s been lots of hot and cold since: flirty and intimate conversations that eventually he leaves on read. Edited February 15, 2024 by Callmekitty Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted February 15, 2024 Share Posted February 15, 2024 I think he's likely met someone else and doesn't have the guts yet to tell you. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted February 15, 2024 Share Posted February 15, 2024 I think once you guys got together, he lost interest but was too cowardly to say so. I think if you want him off your mind you should block him. Doesn't matter what he thinks because this isn't going anywhere anyway. Do what makes you comfortable and easier for you to move on and get over this. Link to post Share on other sites
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