My Checklist

[Els]

Generally speaking, it's fine to want whatever you want, and especially so if you can offer the same things you are asking for. It only becomes a problem when people get so inflexible that they can't find anyone (or can't find anyone who reciprocates their interest), yet they don't realize that their inflexibility is the problem and they keep complaining.

[Els]

Edit: If I had to nitpick your list, it would be as @Alpacalia  said - the last point should probably be rephrased to "wants biological children". Not everyone who "can produce" children wants to do so (lots of us don't, actually), and generally speaking people who want kids but know they are biologically infertile will mention it if you say you want bio kids. So you don't lose anything by phrasing it that way.

[basil67]

And there are women who want kids and believe themselves to be fertile until they find they aren't.   Have you had your swimmers checked for fertility levels?

Edited February 18, 2024 by basil67

[Wiseman2]

Just to be clear, your list is fine. Everyone has some sort of mental must haves and deal breaker list. Writing it down is fine and the wording is fine.

As an aside, this is not a dating app even if people are flirting heavily with you.

You're better off getting a good profile and pics on quality paid dating apps and talking to and meeting real life local women.

[Alpacalia]

Playful banter and talking about music is hardly heavy flirtation. It's just conversation.

Not like posting sultry nine and half week and crash into me music videos back and forth.

[RandallHare]

Yeah, we were just having a nice banter

But I do find Alpacalia interesting so I want to get to know her better

So, where do you live, Alpacalia? How do I address you by the way?

[Alpacalia]

Hi there, thanks for checking out my posts and finding them interesting! I'm flattered. I usually prefer to keep things online, but please know that I'm here to support you and offer guidance. Oh, and in case you were wondering, Alpacalia, is just my screen name - I have a soft spot for alpacas.  So Alpacalia is fine. Alpy, Alp.

As for your question about kids, I totally understand how important that can be for some people, but it's just not something I see in my future. Right now, I'm living on the west coast of the USA (northern-ish). Where do you hail from?

Edited February 18, 2024 by Alpacalia

[ZA Dater]

I think a list can be anything you want it to be BUT for it to be relevant I think it needs to relate to people you have actually met, personality characteristics you have experienced with others. If nothing else perhaps a list can be viewed as a foundation of sorts from which to look. Personally I do not subscribe to the "too fussy" view point provided you believe your list to be realistic and attainable. 

Would seem to me you have certain traits which would make you very marketable in the dating world, so good luck!

[RandallHare]

You have a nice name, Alpy.

I know next to nothing about alpacas, but after seeing the videos, I find them really cute  

Now I’m thinking if it’s possible to bring them to the Philippines  

Btw, I live in Legazpi where you will see out-of-this-world scenery

[Alpacalia]

6 hours ago, RandallHare said:

You have a nice name, Alpy.

I know next to nothing about alpacas, but after seeing the videos, I find them really cute  

Now I’m thinking if it’s possible to bring them to the Philippines  

Btw, I live in Legazpi where you will see out-of-this-world scenery

Why, thank you!

My best female friend from when I was eleven is married to someone from the Philippines. Great food and culture. Her brother is Philippine and his mother is the most amazing cook. She also does his laundry every day and pretty much does all his housework. It's very big in culture to be taking care of your husband from what I've learned.

Their culture values gender roles and traditional family structures, where the wife is primarily responsible for taking care of the household and the husband is considered the head of the family. 

[Foxhall]

Buddy, you can have any list you want, but ultimately guys in general are fundamentally all the same at the end of the day,

attracted to the same women and so on- 

[RandallHare]

19 hours ago, Alpacalia said:

Why, thank you!

My best female friend from when I was eleven is married to someone from the Philippines. Great food and culture. Her brother is Philippine and his mother is the most amazing cook. She also does his laundry every day and pretty much does all his housework. It's very big in culture to be taking care of your husband from what I've learned.

Their culture values gender roles and traditional family structures, where the wife is primarily responsible for taking care of the household and the husband is considered the head of the family. 

Family is a big thing here. It even has a separate article on our constitution. That's how important it is for us.

Where do you live in the West Coast? I have aunts and cousins in California. I'm thinking, are you near Seattle?

[Alpacalia]

I am not near Seattle, I am farther south on the West Coast. One of the most populous and diverse states in the US. It’s known for its tech industry.

Back to your list I think that's fine, it's your list after all and you should tailor it to what's important to you. It's good to have an idea of what you want in a partner, as long as you keep an open mind and don't limit yourself too much. What's most important is finding someone who loves and respects you, and who you love and respect in return. Corny I know but it's true.

Good luck on your search!