throwawayman19 Posted February 24 Share Posted February 24 So my girl (20) and me (23) have been dating for almost 9 months and she gets pissed at me if i dont say anything to her for awhile. We live together, work together, we are together so much. I dont have a lot to talk about but when i do its about games n stuff that she doesnt really care about so she doesnt show interest in the convo so i usually wont say anything and just be on my phone or playing games but next to her bc i like her presence, but like i dont wanna keep having arguments bc i dont have anything to talk about to her. Im not a talkative person either unless its something i know a lot about but thats for very few topics. Idk what i should do Link to post Share on other sites
Sony12 Posted February 24 Share Posted February 24 (edited) Doesn't sound like you two are very compatible. Maybe you shouldn't be living together. Edited February 24 by Sony12 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted February 24 Share Posted February 24 (edited) It seems like you're in a rut and kind of bored with each other. What was the rush moving in together? Why aren't you two doing interesting things, going out, having fun, etc.? Not a lot of women are going to be thrilled looking at the back of your head ignoring them while you play games on your phone. If it's just a bad habit, work on that. Edited February 24 by Wiseman2 Link to post Share on other sites
MsJayne Posted February 24 Share Posted February 24 A partner who sits next to you ignoring you while they scroll through their 'phone or play games is rude. So your girl has every right to be miffed at you. 'Phones are making people very boring. I sometimes travel on public transport, and I count the number of passengers sitting in their seat transfixed to a 'phone screen, (more than 50% of them most days), and they remind me of zombie movies. And the people who walk around staring at their 'phone screen not looking where they're going, I think there should be special holes in the ground for them to drop into, a kind of natural selection process . 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted February 24 Share Posted February 24 3 hours ago, throwawayman19 said: we are together so much. I'll say. Why are you already living together? It seems you are discovering that you two are not that compatible. Arguing a lot after such a short time together is your cue. I would suggest you take a proverbial step back and ask yourself if this relationship is really viable. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted February 24 Share Posted February 24 Sounds like you have nothing in commun and it's a hard truth to discover once the honeymoon phase has past. I suggest you put your phone down if you don't want to lose this relationship. Go out and do things together or stay in and find a series you both like, all this will generate something to talk about. Moving in together too fast kills the romance in no time. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted February 24 Share Posted February 24 The hard truth is, you guys have nothing in common, so the light on this relationship is starting to fade. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted February 24 Share Posted February 24 19 hours ago, throwawayman19 said: I dont have a lot to talk about but when i do its about games n stuff I agree you're incompatible. But dude, if it is literally true that all you can talk about is "games and stuff", then you're going to have a hard time sustaining any relationship. It's important to be able to hold up your own end of a conversation. Ask her about her day. Discuss dinner. Discuss the upcoming weekend. Mention something interesting you read or heard. Read the news. Listen to a podcast when you're travelling. Show her the blurb on a new cafe near you. Get out of the house/neighbourhood and comment on the houses you're walking by (good/bad/ugly). Get on the mailing list for a "what's on" newsletter for your town/city. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 On 2/23/2024 at 8:30 PM, throwawayman19 said: Idk what i should do You should use periods when you write. Seriously. A run on sentence is hard to read. It’s hard when you live and work with each other. You do run out of things to say, and you both need to have your own space/time. While it’s nice to be able to spend time together and not feel like you have to talk all the time, nobody likes to feel ignored. Make a point several times a day to talk with her about different things. Do this, and she will not mind as much when you take a little time for yourself… Link to post Share on other sites
GypsyArcher Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 Doesn't she have any friends or hobbies? I think you are too young to be living together and playing house already. She seems too co-dependent on you. I am perfectly content to hang out with someone while we are each absorbed in our own activities. You seem more introverted whereas she seems to need attention from others in order to be happy. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 Where did you live before you moved in with her? Perhaps it's time to consider going back there. Hanging around ignoring her isn't what relationships are about. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 It's fine to do your own thing sometimes, but you also need to spend quality time together sometimes. It's a balance. "Living and working together" is not a substitute for going out on a date and talking to each other like a couple. Why do you have literally nothing to talk about other than games? I'm a gamer and frankly that would be a red flag to me. You can't make your whole life and personality about just one hobby. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 My husband & I have similar challenges. You both need to compromise. She needs to learn that you are quiet but you need to talk more. Sitting in silence has a place but it can't be all the time. Learn to have a conversation & actually talk to her. If you need topic starters search the web for the Un-Game questions & make a point to talk. A relationship takes more than you just sitting there never talking to her & being unable or unwilling to talk about a variety of subjects. Link to post Share on other sites
Wow420 Posted February 27 Share Posted February 27 (edited) There’s no denying you two were crazy about eachother once sense y’all moved in together so fast, you both know what you want it life and that’s what u have even when some days are a little harder because she’s upset you haven’t talked to her…But that’s how you know she loves you, just be there for her like she is for you because you both deserve it. You two have literally been building a life together and you don’t know what to do over a lil argument? Just let her know you love her and everything will be great❤️ [ ] Edited February 27 by a LoveShack.org Moderator respect to other posts Link to post Share on other sites
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