justvisiting Posted March 3 Share Posted March 3 Hey guys. Recently I've reached an unfamiliar spot I've never been in before. I met a guy a year ago and we've really hit it off. We have similar interests, views, sense of humour and it's so easy to talk. Every time we're together it's fun, we never run out of things to talk and even when we're quiet its pleasant. After meeting, it took about 2 months for us to develop into more, we started flirting and eventually it came to sex. He's really good at turning me on and I can't get enough of him. We also discussed taking things slow because we both have our s*** to deal with and neither of us is a fussy person. We're both really chill and live in the moment kind of people. We go out, we have sex, we talk, we give each other gifts. He's gotten me the best present ever and he's always available when I need someone if things get hard for me. But it's the first time I've been in a situation like this and I don't know what to do next. Should I initiate a talk about possibly getting more serious or not? I'm not too ready for it myself, I don't know if he is either but I feel like I have to do something. I don't want to leave things to just hang, especially since I really enjoy spending time with him and he's the first guy I've been involved with that gives me space, leaves me a lot of freedom and I know he appreciates that I do the same. I don't want to lose that. So any ideas what my next move should be? Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted March 3 Share Posted March 3 That depends. What makes you want to 'go deeper' with him? Is there potential for a deeper connection on a level that is more meaningful than just sharing a similar sense of humor and interests? If not, then maybe this is the comfortable companionship you're seeking. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted March 3 Share Posted March 3 It's seems like you are both enjoying yourselves and each other. You've heard the saying: "if it's not broken, don't fix it"? Link to post Share on other sites
Author justvisiting Posted March 3 Author Share Posted March 3 1 minute ago, Alpacalia said: That depends. What makes you want to 'go deeper' with him? Is there potential for a deeper connection on a level that is more meaningful than just sharing a similar sense of humor and interests? If not, then maybe this is the comfortable companionship you're seeking. I feel there definitely is, we have already been connecting deeper than just sex and talking about surface things but I guess I'm just skittish. I've had some bad experiences and I think they've made me a bit too scared to take a risk again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author justvisiting Posted March 3 Author Share Posted March 3 1 minute ago, Wiseman2 said: It's seems like you are both enjoying yourselves and each other. You've heard the saying: "if it's not broken, don't fix it"? Yeah haha I have and you're right but what if there's a possibility for it to be even better? I'm kind of always loving in the moment but maybe this is the one time I should try to take a step forward on purpose.. I just don't know Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted March 3 Share Posted March 3 8 minutes ago, justvisiting said: I feel there definitely is, we have already been connecting deeper than just sex and talking about surface things but I guess I'm just skittish. I've had some bad experiences and I think they've made me a bit too scared to take a risk again. I'm going to say get right with yourself, first. While you have good feelings for him if you're skittish and I'll go further than that "scared" you're not going to be emotionally flexible with him. He can't be your sanctuary because you're scared (of what's happened in the past). 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author justvisiting Posted March 3 Author Share Posted March 3 2 minutes ago, Alpacalia said: I'm going to say get right with yourself, first. While you have good feelings for him if you're skittish and I'll go further than that "scared" you're not going to be emotionally flexible with him. He can't be your sanctuary because you're scared (of what's happened in the past). Damn right to the point. But you're right, I definitely don't want him to carry any of the problems I've had with other people. Thank you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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