Robotic Posted July 9, 2001 Share Posted July 9, 2001 Actually, I'm not so sure that I want to...after several disasterous relationships, I just don't think I have it in me to try anymore. My last relationship, we lived together for 2 years, ended a year and a half ago. So enough time has passed that I should want to get back up on the horse, right? I even forced myself to go out on a date a couple of weeks ago, but I felt nothing at all and couldn't wait for it to be over. A tiny part of me knows that this is kind of sad, but at the ripe old age of 38, I think that that part of my life is over. I won't go into sordid details about my past relationships, but I was involved with lying, deceitful, emotionally abusive men. I used to will my heart to turn to stone, not hurt anymore...guess I got my wish. I don't know if counseling would help or not, and to be honest, I'm not sure if I feel like putting that kind of effort into it, the old heart has got a solid encasing of ice around it. I'm really not sure why I'm even posting this, guess I'm having an odd moment of sentimentality...I'm sure it'll pass. I've been visiting this forum for a few weeks now, and I can really identify with some of the situations posted here and the great advice given. It's unfortunate that many don't heed that advice, they'd save themselves alot of heartache down the road if they would. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted July 9, 2001 Share Posted July 9, 2001 When we get burned enough times, our hearts can certainly shut down for a time. It seems like it just isn't there...like we are incapable of falling for anybody again. Fear probably plays the biggest part in this shut down. That's the time for just enjoying what you want in life and going about your business. When the time is right, cupid comes out of hibernation and once again we are capable of falling big and hard. Also, as we get older, we become a little more realistic and we probably aren't as capable of all that euphoric fireworks stuff that people feel in their teens and twenties. But you can feel it again, it's only a bit harder because as we get older, we are more wise and more careful. Be patient with yourself. And don't wish for your heart to turn into stone anymore. I don't think a therapist would be of much help here. Let's just hope the ice around your heart will thaw in good time. You know, it's better to have loved and...... Link to post Share on other sites
Ed Posted July 9, 2001 Share Posted July 9, 2001 Good News! You still have the embers within you that can thaw that frozen heart. You would not be reading these posts or even considering dating if you did not have at least some interest in loving and being loved again. Don't be so hard on yourself. You are and always will be capable of love until the day you die. Love is not like money. You will never run out. It is continuously replenished and you don't have to work to earn it. What a deal! It's just a matter of tapping into it and wisely dispersing it to those you deem worthy. Love is a wonderful thing to give away. The problem is, in our productive society, most people hate to see something good go to waste. It is understandable to be apprehensive about giving love away after seeing it misused. But, none of us can control what other people do with the love we give them. All we can do is give until it is rejected, abused or misused to the extent that we must redirect it elsewhere. Hang in there. You will love again and again. Just think of all the poor souls out there that are being denied the opportunity to be loved by you. Link to post Share on other sites
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