Should I still Give ex Christmas Present Even if she has given me a sign about us?

[jordkorn]

My girlfreind and I have been seperated for a month now. I recently made a poster with our pictures on it to show her what she means to me. She also told me there was no romance so I made some cds with love songs to show her what I am thinking. She still sends me e-mails but has not shown anything for us. I want to show her what she means to me. I am not sure what she thinks of me but I want to tell her that I have changed my ways on things. What should I do?

[Art_Critic]

I would like a little more info if I may..

Thanks

 

How old are you two ?

[westernxer]

Why did she break up with you?

[jordkorn]

I am 20 and she is 24. She broke up with me because she said there was not enough romance and that she was not happy for a long time and we did not have the best communication so I went out and bought a vacation for 2 days to try and figure things out. We never got to go because she broke up with me before we could go. I also bought an engagement ring and I was going to propose near Christmas. I love her dearly and I want it to work but she has not given me any signs. I need some advice. Thanks of the advice it means alot to me.

[Selections1]

does she know about the ring?

[Art_Critic]

You don't need to be making her any posters declaring your love..

Or cds.. you will push her further away with kind of stuff..

That stuff is for teenagers.

 

What you need to do is give her time and see if she will give it a go a second time..

But you need to back away from her some.. Give her time..

If you smother her with any declartions of love she will run like the wind..

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That stuff is for teenagers.

QUOTE]

 

I definitely do not agree with that!

 

From what you say, she is a romantic person, I think she would like the poster and cds if she still has feelings for you.

 

We need more info though. Was it an ugly break up? Is she dating someone else? What does she say when she contacts you? etc.

[jordkorn]

I showed her the ring one day when she came over to drop things off. We lived together for almost 9 months. I don't want to annoy her in any way I am just afraid that she will forget about me and find someone else. I am done school in April and will be moving back home and she will be 2 hours away form me so I want to know now what she thinks.

We talked all the time about our future and marriage before so thats why I don't want to lose her

[jordkorn]

She is not dating anyone I know that but she wanted me to give her more romance. It was not ugly I was still living there for a week to find a new place and we would talk about the weather and how her day at work was. But everynight she went out to her friends house and would come home in the morning before she came to work. We did not argue it was smooth so thats why I am not sure what she is thinking of me

[Art_Critic]

I think she would like the poster and cds if she still has feelings for you.

 

I'm exercising my opinion of disagreement with this..

 

If you give her a poster and a cd it will not get her back..it will have the opposite effect you are looking for..

 

making her miss you is the thing that bring the 2 of you together.

 

Disappear for a few weeks ..

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making her miss you is the thing that bring the 2 of you together.

 

Art_Critic, I am a big fan of NC, I have been doing it for the past 2 weeks. However, it might not work in every case.

 

jordkorn, if she was complaining that you were not showing enough love and if that's why she was not happy, then you should show her that you are a loving boyfriend.

 

But if she lost interest in you or the relationship, then no contact would work.

 

It depends on your circumstances.

[jordkorn]

She told me that once our wounds heal then we can start talking again. But I am not sure how long should I wait she is my first real girlfriend and we have been dating for a year and a half now. I am just worried that she will move on and I don' want that at all. She told me if it was meant to be we would work it out to. I think about it every day and want to call but I don't want to push her away. My birthday is on the 29th so i am wondering if she will say anything for me then.

[Art_Critic]

a poster and a cd of songs isn't showing someone love AFTER the breakup.. it is downright wimpy..

 

The poster and cd would work if they were still together..

 

You are telling him things he wants to hear..

 

Try getting her to talk to you and get her to a romantic dinner and bring flowers.. that shows romance

[impuls3]

Disappear for a few weeks ..

thats what i would tell ya... just vanish for abit and make her see what shes missing

[westernxer]

According to his other post, the ex is nothing more than a hag who likes to make his life miserable.

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t75375/

[Brittanyjean06]

if anything make those cd's and posters for your self...your birthday is coming up!

 

 

seems like shes been through this b4? maybe just by her saying" we need our wounds to heal" and since this is your first gf, you might think its forever

 

im not sure

[downcydeguy]

If you've already paid for these gifts, hold on to them until Christmas. Keep NC until then. And when Christmas arrives, see how things are at that point. If she still doesn't want to be with you, keep them yourself. Last year, I worked in Florida from Nov. to Feb.. I flew back home on Dec. 22nd and my g/f picked me up at the airport. She was acting really weird, so when we got back to my place, I asked her what was wrong. "Blah, blah, blah, I need space, blah, blah," and dumped me right then and there. Her gifts were already wrapped and ready so I told her to just take them. I regret giving them to her because they 1) didn't help change her mind, and 2) were expensive and I could've taken them back!

 

So, as I said, I would wait till Christmas to see what she's decided at that point.