Gabby Posted July 12, 2001 Share Posted July 12, 2001 I am having a problem with my boyfriend mom. She is always treating me differently when "J" is around, but when we are alone (which I really try never to get caught alone) she is so mean. I just makes me sick she can be this way. I treat her son so great. He even tells her he is happier than he has ever been. She only says i am second best to herself. It just really bothers me he never sees her like this so he probably thinks i am crazy and jealous. She calls contantly and then proceeds to make him feel guilty that she never get so see him so he will take her to lunch. We go see her and his dad every weekend and sometimes during the week we also visit them. He is an only child but come on already does she not want him to be happy and have a life of his own. His dad loves me and is nothing but respectful to me. Not only that when i ask if he has talked to his family, just yesterday he said no and i really found it hard to believe, and i said "Really"? and then he finally admitted he had talked to his mom on the phone and took her to lunch because she called and was upset that they had not done that in such a long time. 3 weeks before they had gone, and like i said before we are always at there house bringing dinner over or just to visit. I am not overexaggerating when i say all the time i really mean it. i am really frustrated i have talked to him on numerous occations and nothing i say seems to be helping. gabby Link to post Share on other sites
sassafrass Posted July 12, 2001 Share Posted July 12, 2001 I had the same problem with my ex bf's mom. she used to go out of her way to make me feel like i was stealing her son from her. He was a grown man in his late twenties. When he was around, she was sweet as punch to me but when we were alone she would do her best to get her digs in at me. Sometimes she was subtle and sometimes she was very direct. she would call us every single sunday and expect that we would go there for sunday night dinner. Sometimes I didn't mind but sometimes I just wanted us to have the evening together. She could be really controlling. My ex wasn't very good about standing up to her. Does your guy stand up to his Mom and understand how you feel? How long have you been together? Is your guy really defensive of his mom's actions? I am having a problem with my boyfriend mom. She is always treating me differently when "J" is around, but when we are alone (which I really try never to get caught alone) she is so mean. I just makes me sick she can be this way. I treat her son so great. He even tells her he is happier than he has ever been. She only says i am second best to herself. It just really bothers me he never sees her like this so he probably thinks i am crazy and jealous. She calls contantly and then proceeds to make him feel guilty that she never get so see him so he will take her to lunch. We go see her and his dad every weekend and sometimes during the week we also visit them. He is an only child but come on already does she not want him to be happy and have a life of his own. His dad loves me and is nothing but respectful to me. Not only that when i ask if he has talked to his family, just yesterday he said no and i really found it hard to believe, and i said "Really"? and then he finally admitted he had talked to his mom on the phone and took her to lunch because she called and was upset that they had not done that in such a long time. 3 weeks before they had gone, and like i said before we are always at there house bringing dinner over or just to visit. I am not overexaggerating when i say all the time i really mean it. i am really frustrated i have talked to him on numerous occations and nothing i say seems to be helping. gabby Link to post Share on other sites
sparkle Posted July 13, 2001 Share Posted July 13, 2001 Tell your boyfriend that you do not wish to be around his mother ALONE. She only acts this way behind his back right? From now on, make it a point to keep yourself out of any situation where you two may end up alone. I've always found a guy's father easier to get along with than his mother. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
Ashesmum Posted July 13, 2001 Share Posted July 13, 2001 Depending how desperate you are, you could record a conversation when you two are alone and then play it for your b/f. Or if you're balsy enough talk to her straight out and ask her why she has such a problem with you. Or tell her to go to hell cause you ain't going nowhere. You should probly talk to your b/f about not being so clingy to her too. He needs to stand up and maybe see what priorities come first. Or if you're stuck alone with her, leave. She'll get the message and you can tell her why you do it. I am having a problem with my boyfriend mom. She is always treating me differently when "J" is around, but when we are alone (which I really try never to get caught alone) she is so mean. I just makes me sick she can be this way. I treat her son so great. He even tells her he is happier than he has ever been. She only says i am second best to herself. It just really bothers me he never sees her like this so he probably thinks i am crazy and jealous. She calls contantly and then proceeds to make him feel guilty that she never get so see him so he will take her to lunch. We go see her and his dad every weekend and sometimes during the week we also visit them. He is an only child but come on already does she not want him to be happy and have a life of his own. His dad loves me and is nothing but respectful to me. Not only that when i ask if he has talked to his family, just yesterday he said no and i really found it hard to believe, and i said "Really"? and then he finally admitted he had talked to his mom on the phone and took her to lunch because she called and was upset that they had not done that in such a long time. 3 weeks before they had gone, and like i said before we are always at there house bringing dinner over or just to visit. I am not overexaggerating when i say all the time i really mean it. i am really frustrated i have talked to him on numerous occations and nothing i say seems to be helping. gabby Link to post Share on other sites
Gabby Posted July 16, 2001 Share Posted July 16, 2001 Well i thoutht that he did believe me, we have had more than one conversation about her. the last one was what i was regarding in my message. we did just talk about it again and he said i just seem to take things the wrong way and she probably does not realize that she is doing it. i so don't believe that because she would be just as ugly around the both of us if that is the case. but it is only around me alone when the wolf comes out. I really do not think he stands up to her he says he does not tell her about her actions because i don't want him to. well i have told him that i did not want him to say anything because he knows it will make the situation even worse. He said it is not the first time she has acted like this. We have been going out for a year now and he says she knows most people do not like her because she is like this. what do you think? I had the same problem with my ex bf's mom. she used to go out of her way to make me feel like i was stealing her son from her. He was a grown man in his late twenties. When he was around, she was sweet as punch to me but when we were alone she would do her best to get her digs in at me. Sometimes she was subtle and sometimes she was very direct. she would call us every single sunday and expect that we would go there for sunday night dinner. Sometimes I didn't mind but sometimes I just wanted us to have the evening together. She could be really controlling. My ex wasn't very good about standing up to her. Does your guy stand up to his Mom and understand how you feel? How long have you been together? Is your guy really defensive of his mom's actions? Link to post Share on other sites
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