Troubled Heart Posted November 27, 2005 Share Posted November 27, 2005 I suppose I should start off with a little history so you guys know where I'm coming from. About 6 years ago, in high school, I dated this guy Andrew for only 4 months. He was a great boyfriend, kind, and I was attracted to him. However, I broke up with him for no apparent reason and completely out of the blue. It was one of those things where I was young, stupid, and thought I could have any guy I wanted. I felt bad knowing that he didn't deserve to be treated like that. I thought somehow I was punished in later relationships for treating Andrew horribly. All my insecurities seemed to stem from that first relationship. We never did anything besides make out and it was all very innocent. Fast-forward 6 years: I had found Andrew online on one of those friendship websites. I sent him an email asking if he remembered me (obviously he did seeing as how I was his first gf). We exchanged some more emails and I found out he has a current gf with a relationship spanning over 4 years! We decided to get together over Thanksgiving weekend to reunite in our hometown. We talked about the past. We discussed a lot of things...even the gf. Then something happened. We were back at my apt looking at old photographs and ended up sleeping together. He has always been considered a "what-if" of my life....looking back I know I should have stayed longer with him. So we slept together, knowing that he had a girlfriend. But now I'm more confused than ever. I don't know what to do b/c I find myself liking him again. And I know that everyone will think he's a horrible jerk but this one indiscretion is completely out of character for him. It was a minor infidelity (only happening once while he still has a gf, that much I can confirm) fueled by 6 years of what-ifs, passion, and alcohol (not an excuse). So now, I'm reeling from everything. I like him. I liked talking to him before we hooked up. Now I don't know what to think. I don't know what's right anymore. I don't know what I'm supposed to do b/c all I want to do is be with him again! Any suggestions? Anyone else in a similiar situation? Is a new relationship doomed if it started out with cheating on a past relationship? What we did is wrong, I know that. I just want to know what I should do to save face and not feel bad that I'm not feeling worse about the situation. Link to post Share on other sites
Brittanyjean06 Posted November 27, 2005 Share Posted November 27, 2005 it shocks me, by reading some peoples stories....many years can go by, and all it does it come down to that one person, life is werid. you have to think about this hard though, hes been with someone for 4 years...witch is a really long time....he must have loved you all along, or had those same feelings for you again. what has he said about his current girlfriend, will he leave her for you?... be careful with this one Link to post Share on other sites
Author Troubled Heart Posted November 28, 2005 Author Share Posted November 28, 2005 He hasn't said too much about the current gf.... I don't ask what he's going to do. Well, I haven't done it just yet. I'm avoiding contact with him for a few weeks to give both of us time to think about what we want...I don't want to influence any decision he makes, which I have no choice but to respect whatever it is he wants. But, the morning after (he stayed all night) he commented on how he had a lot to think about now. Understandable. All my guy friends swore he was still in love with me even after all this time b/c he made sure we met up in person, not just through email. I guess all I can do is wait to see what it is he decides about the situation and go from there. Waiting is torture. I already want to hear his voice over the phone and see him again!..... Link to post Share on other sites
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