Scared and confused

[Nobel]

This week, I have gone through a marriot of emotions, nervousness, afraid, joy, sadness. I have talked to many people close to me and they believe that I am in love with my girlfriend, but it will take me some time to get my feelings in check. What do you think.

 

I have liked other girls, I have gone out with other (1)girls, so she is not exactly my first love. Even when I thought (just the thought) of being apart from her makes me feel bad. Deep inside I want to be with her, and then I feel scared and confused. Is that normal.

 

I think I am scared because I have been alone (not being in a realtionship, but I have messed around a little) for so long (real long), and I am in a situation that I have no prior experience in, so that might be the reason for my sudden change in my moods.

 

This relationship was not formed from infatuation, I liked her since 99, and we gradually got closer.

 

Your opinions would be appreciated a lot.

[Nobel]

Will anyone please help me

This week, I have gone through a marriot of emotions, nervousness, afraid, joy, sadness. I have talked to many people close to me and they believe that I am in love with my girlfriend, but it will take me some time to get my feelings in check. What do you think. I have liked other girls, I have gone out with other (1)girls, so she is not exactly my first love. Even when I thought (just the thought) of being apart from her makes me feel bad. Deep inside I want to be with her, and then I feel scared and confused. Is that normal. I think I am scared because I have been alone (not being in a realtionship, but I have messed around a little) for so long (real long), and I am in a situation that I have no prior experience in, so that might be the reason for my sudden change in my moods. This relationship was not formed from infatuation, I liked her since 99, and we gradually got closer.

 

Your opinions would be appreciated a lot.

[sparkle]

You don't have anything to be scared about.

 

Do you like this girl? If so, then go out with her. Don't worry about where this will head or how long it was last for. Just worry about enjoying the present moment with this girl. Have fun with her and be happy. By the way, going out with a person should make you HAPPY and make you feel GOOD.

 

If you're feeling afraid and sad and anxious, something is wrong here, and you should get out of whatever situation is causing these negative feelings.

[Miss Mojo]

hi nobel,

 

i think one of the questions to ask yourself here is do *you* believe that you are in love with your girlfriend? whether or not you are in love with a person cannot be decided by your friends or anyone else based on what you tell them.

 

spending time with a person and getting to know everything about them - likes, dislikes, idiosyncrasies, flaws - is the only real way you may possibly fall in love with them. you have obviously known this girl for quite some time, and the fact that you feel bad at the thought of being apart from her, is proof that you have very deep feelings for her. some people, when they are in love, can't stand the thought of not having their partner around. then again, no one can really define exactly what "being in love" feels like. you just feel it, and we all feel it in different ways and at different levels.

 

i tend to feel that what is making you scared and confused is that you have never been in love before. but trust me, love is not something to be scared of.

 

are you afraid of committing to her because you have played the field for so long? is that why you feel so confused and afraid?

 

are you afraid of falling in love with her and what if the relationship doesn't work out?

 

are you ready to commit to one person, or do you still feel that you would like to play the field a bit more?

 

whether or not a person has been in a few serious relationships and been in love before, doesn't mean that it will be the same with another person again. you could have all the experience in the world with relationships, yet find yourself in a situation that is totally newn to you. every time we get involved with a person, we are taking a gamble in a new situation. it just helps if you honestly feel you are ready to be involved with someone.

 

don't be afraid of loving this girl. don't be afraid of loving anybody. it's okay to love a person and not be sure what you want. however, it's not okay to fully commit to a person if you're not ready for a relationship, but they are. timing is everything in relationships, and perhaps you just need to work out if this is the right time for you to take your relationship to the level of commitment to one person.

 

so again, i stress the time issue here....perhaps you need to spend more time with her until you can say for certain what you want with her. there is no need to rush anything. let your feelings take their natural course, try not to be afraid of what you feel (cos honestly, love can feel bloody awesome!), and just go with the flow.

 

on the other hand, if you're not ready to commit to her, then let her know *now*.

 

so in conclusion, ask yourself are you honestly ready for this?

 

best wishes