TO TONY

[laura]

hi Tony, I was wondering if you could please respond to my post "To Tony, Miss Mojo, and Ernie."

 

thanks.

[Tony T]

You seem to be obsessed with this guy. You've got to get out of the mindset of getting all wrapped up with people who don't want much to do with you.

 

This guy has made it pretty clear he is not interested in you. That should be all it takes for you to move on. Your inability to do so may have something to do with childhood abandonment or other experiences...or it may just be an ego thing.

 

You have to understand that time is very valuable. When you gain a sense of strength, discipline and a great love for yourself, not only will you give little thought to those who reject you but you really won't care. Furthermore, with this kind of strength you will attract far more people to you.

 

I'm really not sure what sort of answer you're looking for in your post below and that's why I didn't respond to it. But basically you've got to get yourself together and get over it...NOW...for your own good.

 

This guy is history. There is just way too much life to enjoy to keep sulking about something that's not going to happen. There are too many positive experiences and people out there to more constructively spend your time on and with.

 

If I didn't answer your post properly, be more specific as to exactly what you are needing here and I'll try to help.

[laura]

thanks so much for responding, i guess what i really want to know is what this guy thinks of me, i mean i know that he obviously doen't like me the way i like him, and i know that you are not a mind reader. but, in your opinion, knowing what i have told you, what do you think this guy thinks of me? thanks so much. and please,just go ahead and be brutally honest i think i can handle it, thanks.

[sparkle]

I think that this guy does NOT want to talk to you, and wants to be left alone. If he likes you at all, he will let you know on your own. I also think this guy thinks that you are obsessed with him and that you are pretty pathetic and immature, and I'm sure he doesn't want to be with an immature person.

 

Now FORGET ABOUT HIM!

 

Just my brutal honesty...

[Tony T]

Being chased by someone where the interest is not mutual is very awkward. There was some receptiveness on his part when he thought it might just be friendship you were after. But when he learned you wanted more, it just became too wierd for him to handle.

 

People would just prefer to totally avoid someone than to have to deal with the awkwardness.

 

And the longer it takes you to get the hint and govern yourself accordingly, his desire to avoid you may turn into outright anger as he considers you more of an annoyance or an irritant. Just leave the guy alone and you'll be OK in his book.

 

As a female, you may have had experiences with males doing this same thing to you. You ought to understand this concept and EXACTLY what he is thinking.

 

No more messages, IMs, phone calls, etc. Just plain forget him.

 

Over and out.

[laura]

thanks so much, i guess that pretty much answers my question. i haven't spoken to him since our fight which was a few months ago, but the thing is that i am constantly bumping into him by accident and i'm afraid he thinks that i planned to bump into him or something. but, even when i see him somewhere accidently i don't talk to him. but a couple of weeks ago i went to apply for a job and he was working there and i could have sworn that when he saw me come in he came over to say hi, but i turned away and walked the other way and then when i went to give in my applocation at the register he was just standing there staring at me, it was probably the most awkward moment ever, i couldn't even look at him. and you know when i think of it this is all his fault. last summer when i knew he has a girlfriend i didn't even talk to him too much because i knew it was hopeless, he's the one who approached me and started talking to me. and then i started to like him. so see, it's not totally my fault that i like him.

 

thanks so much and if you have any comments on this latest episode i would love to hear them, thanks so so much.

 

Being chased by someone where the interest is not mutual is very awkward. There was some receptiveness on his part when he thought it might just be friendship you were after. But when he learned you wanted more, it just became too wierd for him to handle. People would just prefer to totally avoid someone than to have to deal with the awkwardness.

 

And the longer it takes you to get the hint and govern yourself accordingly, his desire to avoid you may turn into outright anger as he considers you more of an annoyance or an irritant. Just leave the guy alone and you'll be OK in his book.

 

As a female, you may have had experiences with males doing this same thing to you. You ought to understand this concept and EXACTLY what he is thinking. No more messages, IMs, phone calls, etc. Just plain forget him. Over and out.

[Laurynn]

How on earth could any of us *know* what this guy thinks of you? We're not mind readers. But that point aside, I think the guy made it abundantly CLEAR. He doesn't want you to contact him again. In other words, he is NOT INTERESTED AT ALL. Forget him, move on, devote your time and energy to something else, someONE else. This guy is just not interested.

 

L

[Laurynn]

You wrote:

 

"but a couple of weeks ago i went to apply for a job and he was working there..."

 

Honestly now, did you KNOW that he worked at this place that you were applying for a job at?

 

L

[laura]

No, I promise i hade no idea he was working there. i was in such shock to see him, so no it was not planned i honestly had no idea he would be there.

You wrote: "but a couple of weeks ago i went to apply for a job and he was working there..."

 

Honestly now, did you KNOW that he worked at this place that you were applying for a job at? L