Kissking Posted July 18, 2001 Share Posted July 18, 2001 Recently I split with my girlfriend of 2yrs and 3months ,we did not live togeather but seemed happy with that arrangement I used to see her most days and stay at her house on friday and saturday nights ,neither of us where interested in marriage . On the 23rd of June I thought she looked a bit down ,so I gave her $50 to go out on a girls night out with her friends ,I stayed at her house ,I went to bed at about 12 midnight and woke up at about 4pm ,she wasnt back ...so I started to worry that something might have happened to her ...at 6.30 I went out to get a packet of cigarettes ..when I came back at around 7am she was in the bed ,I said to her "where ya been " she told me that she had met a guy in a bar and had spent about 3 hours up at his house ..she then proceded to make love to me (for the last time as it turned out),what happened played on my mind and on tueday night at around 8.30pm I said to her what do you really want from this relationship ,after prying a bit she broke down and said "nothing really" we where both crying she said "I never ment to hurt you" and "its nothing you have done" ...over the next three days I was pretty much a mess ,I went out on sat night by myself and on sun morning ..curiosity got the better of me ...as she had told me this guys name ,I got a phone book and found his address ...sure enough there was susans car parked outside his house ,I got on the mobile phone and phoned her up ,the first person to answer was her best freind ,then my ex,...I made out like I wasnt in the area, talked small talk a bit then hung up ,then I had a guilt trip ,I phoned back saying what I had done and how bad i felt about sneaking about on her ...ok to speed the story along a bit ..after talking to her quite a bit ,I found out that she started seeing him the very next day after we split ,and slept with him less than a week after she last slept with me ....The thing is I loved and trusted that gal so much ,how do i deal with the fact that she had so little feeling for me as to do that .. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted July 18, 2001 Share Posted July 18, 2001 It doesn't mean that she had so little feelings for you. A lot of people's style calls for them to submerge themselves into another relationship as soon as possible to drown out the pain. This is normally called a rebound but it's just a way of life for many people. Don't even try to read what is going on in this chick's mind. Stop your surveillance of her, don't call her anymore from your cell phone, and move on with your life. Believe me, there are wonderful women with their heads on straight...and you don't ever want to be with one permanently who is not that way. Just because you loved and trusted her didn't make her sane and level headed. When we're in love, we often don't see the flakiness. Consider yourself lucky all this didn't happen after you were married to her and with a couple of kids. Go out and celebrate!!! Link to post Share on other sites
chick Posted July 18, 2001 Share Posted July 18, 2001 hi i completely understand your pain right now. what your ex has done is a selfish and hurtful thing....and she obviously didn't deserve to have a great guy like you. i mean, you trusted her to go out with the girls and enjoy herself, and she ended up at another guy's house? nuh-uh, wrong move on her part. it's her loss, whether or not you can believe that right now. you loved and trusted someone who couldn't return the feelings to you, and you don't deserve that. it's not so much that she did this because she didn't have feelings for you, she probably cared for you a lot, but she was too selfish and inconsiderate to think of how this may affect you.....she was putting herself first and foremost. she has screwed up here and really, would you want to be with a girl who obviously isn't too interested in settling down yet? she wants to be with other guys.....so leave her be and go ahead with your own life. there are girls out there who you would be much better suited to. as she told you, she probably didn't mean to hurt you, but the fact is that she did, and she will more than likely regret it one day. you haven't done anything wrong here.....you simply put your trust in someone who wasn't trustworthy. you simply loved someone who didn't deserve your love. you can't change what has happened....however, you can learn from it. you need to accept that it's over and start to move on. put it behind you.....this chapter of your life has finished, you can now move on to bigger and better things. you have to try everything in your power at the moment to get through the pain.....focus your attention on other things....going out with friends, hobbies....get your own life back into order and do your best to forget this girl. DON'T contact her and DON'T follow her around anymore. there's just no point. and under all and any circumstances, DON'T consider getting back with her. you have lost all trust you ever had for her, and you won't ever get it back, trust me. you will eventually get over the feelings of hurt, abandonment, betrayal.....and you will realise you are probably much better off without this girl. the best of luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Angel By Nature Posted July 18, 2001 Share Posted July 18, 2001 i was seeing this man that worked for my father and one day my fathe was arguing with my mother and they had a fight and then this man his name is Marcus came home to us then my dad went to hit him and he walked away and allthis happened on suday i havent spoken to him since. but now i know wjere he is living and i may be going over there on Friday to see him. WHAT DO I SAY TO HIM? how do i tell him that i miss him and that i think that i am in love with him. he is also 9 years older than me and he has 2 children of his own one is 3 and the other is 5. Imiss hi and i dont know what i am going to say to him on friday. HELP Link to post Share on other sites
Lou Lou Posted July 18, 2001 Share Posted July 18, 2001 Did all this happen AFTER you broke up or before..I am confused... Link to post Share on other sites
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