dirty dancing/cultural differences

[westernxer]

Um hello? The Caribbean isn't considered a 'hispanic' area!

 

What do you call the Dominican Republic, Cuba, and Puerto Rico?

 

I said a few of them have hispanic roots. Not all.

 

Never said they were hispanic areas, even though Spanish is the predominant language in all three countries (aunque Puerto Rico pertenece a los Estados Unidos). This probably means they're hispanic areas.

[Neptune]

Almost any woman will get down and dirty on the dance floor. But there is a catch. And few men are able to do it. You must respect her. If a woman thinks you are making a sexual come on to her, she will back off.

 

Women naturally express their sensuality while dancing. The reason they can`t do it more is because the guy interprets it as a sexual come on. If you truly dance with a woman, she will be able to relax and express her sensuality.

 

Boy, it sure looks good. But it based on respect. The moment you cross the line she becomes defensive. Man, it is amazing to see a woman really get into it. But, few people know it but you get her confidence through resistence.

 

As you put up resistence she unleashes and is able to express her sensuality in confidence. A dnace is a dance. The man respects the woman while she expresses her sensuality.

 

OK, guys that is about a million dollar education I just gave you.

[westernxer]

Almost any woman will get down and dirty on the dance floor. But there is a catch. And few men are able to do it. You must respect her. If a woman thinks you are making a sexual come on to her, she will back off.

 

Problem is, this guy started grinding her with his genitalia, and she went along with it. Maybe she got caught up in the moment and didn't realize it.

 

Would've been great if the guy turned into some slimy reptilian with a large tail going up her skirt, like the scene from "Jacob's Ladder," in which Tim Robbins started hallucinating his girlfriend grinding doggy style with this horrible creature.

[westernxer]

By the way, I've grinded on a few chicks back in the day, going as far as grabbing their asses and working my way inside their clothing, if you know what I mean.

 

Thank goodness their boyfriends weren't around for the show. It could've gotten ugly.

[Neptune]

It is true there is a lot of simulated sex happening on the dance floor. But, it will likely look just like that. So, I can`t say what happened in any case. But, there is a fine line. Usually with a woman, the moment you start getting sexual she will back off.

 

Dance is so provacative nowadays it can be hard to interpret. And it is getting where a lot of young women in particular have lost touch with feminine expression.

 

But, usually, even what appears the most sexualized of dance, the woman still needs the guy to respect her. Groping a gal on a dance floor really has no more validity to a woman than if you just groped her any place else.

 

You can get down and be dirty, but a woman still needs to feel that umbrella of respect.

[Outcast]

this guy started grinding her with his genitalia,

 

It's not as if he was doing it nude!!!! I assume he was fully clothed, as was she. I'm guessing you don't object to slow dancing where chests and crotches are usually pretty close.

[Neptune]

Westernxer,

I think what I am trying to say is the dance floor is a place to express sensuality, not have sex. Generally it is socially unaceptable to have sex in public. Yeah, I know, it seems to be happening.

 

but, the idea of sensuality is based on resistence. It may be that a gal will let you f*ck her on the dance floor. That is sex. Not sensuality.

 

Dance reaches its peak expressing sensuality. This has been because having sex on the dance floor has been socially unaceptable. When having sex on the dance floor becomes acceptable. Don`t expect much sensuality in dance.

 

As I stated earlier, if you want a woman to express her sensuality on the dance floor, you must put up resistance.

[westernxer]

Westernxer,

I think what I am trying to say is the dance floor is a place to express sensuality, not have sex. Generally it is socially unaceptable to have sex in public. Yeah, I know, it seems to be happening.

 

but, the idea of sensuality is based on resistence. It may be that a gal will let you f*ck her on the dance floor. That is sex. Not sensuality.

 

Dance reaches its peak expressing sensuality. This has been because having sex on the dance floor has been socially unaceptable. When having sex on the dance floor becomes acceptable. Don`t expect much sensuality in dance.

 

As I stated earlier, if you want a woman to express her sensuality on the dance floor, you must put up resistance.

 

I agree with you 100 percent. Few things are more enticing than watching a woman who knows how to dance. Very sensual indeed. Ever watch Bollywood movies (from India)? Totally sensual, with hot, hot chicks strutting their stuff. A few years ago Shakira did a number at the MTV Video Awards, shaking her hips to the beat of the drum, and it was mouth watering, to say the least. Every family wedding I go to has some sort of island theme, complete with beautiful girls doing the hula and tahitian dances. The tahitian is, by far, the hottest, especially when the girls pick you from the audience to do it with them. First time I got picked, everyone thought I'd be put on the spot (too haoli, so went the perception), but little did they know... hehehe.

 

Even the Bible acknowledges the allure of a sensual woman. King Herod was so mesmerized by the dancing of Salome that he granted her one wish, which turned out to be the head of John the Baptist. It's all in the hips, I suppose.

[loony]

Almost any woman will get down and dirty on the dance floor.

In what area do you live?

 

As I stated earlier, if you want a woman to express her sensuality on the dance floor, you must put up resistance.

[Neptune]

Loony,

To say almost any woman will get down and dirty on the dance floor is an overstatement. but I thought it made sense to look at it that way in this thread. I don`t want this guy to take what goes on the dance floor too seriously.

 

Let me state it this way. More women thatn most men think will get down and dirty on the dance floor if they are dancing with a man that can unleash their sensuality.

 

I have learned this the hard way by dancing with women that seemed to be a dead fish and then later watch them "strut thier stuff" with another guy. So in time I learned more about what is really going on.

 

It is not something that you learn in dance class. In fact, I am at a loss to explain it. As close as I can get is that a guy has to be able to communicate through his lead in the dance that she is free to express herself sensually without him making a sexual move on her.

 

If a guy can do this, women will often reach a state of inhibition that is rather surprising.

[Outcast]

a state of inhibition

 

I'm thinking you were after 'disinhibition' there.

[Neptune]

Quite true Outcast. Thanks for pointing that out. Of course, you step on a woman`s feet enough when dancing with her and it may be true:laugh:

[loony]

Loony,

To say almost any woman will get down and dirty on the dance floor is an overstatement. but I thought it made sense to look at it that way in this thread. I don`t want this guy to take what goes on the dance floor too seriously.

 

Let me state it this way. More women thatn most men think will get down and dirty on the dance floor if they are dancing with a man that can unleash their sensuality.

 

I have learned this the hard way by dancing with women that seemed to be a dead fish and then later watch them "strut thier stuff" with another guy. So in time I learned more about what is really going on.

 

It is not something that you learn in dance class. In fact, I am at a loss to explain it. As close as I can get is that a guy has to be able to communicate through his lead in the dance that she is free to express herself sensually without him making a sexual move on her.

 

If a guy can do this, women will often reach a state of inhibition that is rather surprising.

Ok, could be... I don't go dancing very often and I actually don't know what's going on on the dance floor. That's actually a very nice insight that you offered, I must pay attention to this next time!

[Cecelius]

To hell with norms. The path is simple:

 

It is not in bobby orr's picture for his girl to be dancing like that so he shut it down. If she wants to dance like that, then she finds a different man.

 

That was pretty easy.

[Outcast]

Nice. So what the man says goes. Well then what about if it's not in her picture for him to look at pictures of supermodels. Does she get to order him to obey too?

 

[Cecelius]

Nice. So what the man says goes. Well then what about if it's not in her picture for him to look at pictures of supermodels. Does she get to order him to obey too?

 

 

No one said anything about ordering anyone to do anything. It's like bobby deciding he prefers blondes, or she deciding she prefers a gutless b/f who enjoys being disrespected in public...

 

seriously, why order someone to do anything or even try to influence them? There are millions of women on the planet, why hang with someone who is clearly not a match (assuming he decides to feel that way)?

 

On the other hand, he could have moved on the female friend and then asked his g/f about a 3 way...

[Outcast]

She didn't do anything disrespectful. She did what she thought was normal regular behaviour and found out it bothered him and then quit doing it.

 

Lighten UP!

 

Crikey.

[bobbyorr]

I agree with cecelius -- and outcast, that's a ridiculous comparison. Grinding on someone else on the dance is floor is a hell of a lot different than looking at a magazine.

 

Having said that, if my partner had a problem with some aspect of my behaviour, and I could change that behaviour without changing my principles or who I am, I would do it.

 

For example, if she didn't like me going to strip joints, I wouldn't go -- not that I go anyway,but you know what I mean.

 

Different people may have different ideas about what is appropriate -- my girlfriend's idea of what is appropriate on the dance floor differs from mine in a major way -- and I told her so. I also told her I couldn't accept her dancing that way. She was free to either take my feelings into account and stop -- or find another guy.

 

I also told her not to change the way she danced if she felt it was a major sacrifice -- because that would suggest to me we are just too different in terms of what we expected from our partner.

[loony]

Different people may have different ideas about what is appropriate -- my girlfriend's idea of what is appropriate on the dance floor differs from mine in a major way -- and I told her so. I also told her I couldn't accept her dancing that way. She was free to either take my feelings into account and stop -- or find another guy.

You really should consider if she is the right one for you. If I understood it right, she agreed to stop with this 'grinding'. But from your post it seems as if you're still upset about her doing this and you also seem to be very suspicious. If you can't trust her enough that she won't do it in the future, then you have some issues here that you should talk over with her. Or you leave this relationship that doesn't seem to make you happy anyway.