Happiness Is A Choic Posted December 5, 2005 Share Posted December 5, 2005 We Met this february. Immediate attraction was obvious but not even considered. We started spending long periods of time together, hanging out, partying a bit but mostly just spending endless hours talking. Nothing planned but every week or two we seemed to call or run into each other. We developed a unique special friendship for each of us. We both saw other people from time to time. Our bond was more like that you develope with a childhood frind you still have. (He is 44 and I am 40.) I never sensed jealousy or sexual tension, although some friends seemed to. We share a unique bond with inexplicable trust the type that your lucky to experience only a few timews in life. But Large parts of our lifes were off limits, ( not because of infeidelities or the like) but because as James Bond as it sounds, we have dangerous, secret high level security /life and death lifestyles. Five months ago he had an accident and started staying with me periodically (platonically). I called him my sometimes roommate. A month ago we both had something ( unrelated experiences) that sparked a big change. The friendship never lessoned but suddenly we both were looking at each other with lust and romance. Well finally last week we crossed the line. Mind blowing. my question and request for guidance and experience is how is the transition supposed to happen? I've never had this type of experience. The new fireworks feeling are replaced by an akwardness, or uncertainty how to interact. We both want this undoubtedly and it feels like the most mature realtionship I have ever. There was never a consideration of "friends w/ benefits". We are fumbling to transition to BF/GF and its wierd. The physical is slow and intense. But Is this normal and how do I make the transition.? Suddenly I care about what he thinks, looking my best, all that early realtionship stuff. He reacts to me like a typical GFand instantly seemed to change the role from frind to BF. i 'M HAPPY , WE COMMUNICATE, i WANT THIS, i JUST DON'T KMOW HOW TO TANSITION MORE GRACEFULLY AND need some INSIGHT INTO THIS NEW ROLE HES TAKEN ON AND HOW IT EFFECTS EACH OF US AND BOTH OF US. Is any of this an indication that we made a wrong move? should the transition be smooth, natural, etc? Link to post Share on other sites
Sand&Water Posted December 5, 2005 Share Posted December 5, 2005 Just be yourself. Thats all that matters. Since he cared for you/liked you/loved you before, then he'll continue to appreciate that special friendship. It will gradually and gracefully bloosom into something special on its own. Good Luck Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted December 5, 2005 Share Posted December 5, 2005 Is any of this an indication that we made a wrong move? Not at all. It's normal when a relationship changes status. Link to post Share on other sites
tinktronik Posted December 5, 2005 Share Posted December 5, 2005 Its perfectly normal for the transition to be "clumbsy" .Just enjoy the award laughter as much as you can and as time passes you will come to feel more natural in that way with each other. A couple of drinks and a jazz club helped me . Link to post Share on other sites
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