Opinion from men....... last names.

[a4a]

Alvin is doing time for cocaine possession. Simon left the country and now lives in a commune somewhere on the east coast of India. Theodore roamed around the continent for a while, trying to hawk tapes and CDs, and at last report was living in a box under the Santa Monica Freeway.

 

Slub thank you for the update on the gang. I was concerned that they were sold into the slave trade in some far off country..... sounds like they are doing well for themselves.

 

a4a- I wear sandals in the snow

[a4a]

You're the one that started the thread, sweeite.

 

Oh, and look! Here comes Outcast right on schedule hurling insults that, ironically, apply more to herself than anyone else.

 

That is true honey bunch I did start the thread....... and it is not bothering me. I think it is interesting. Not sweating it at all. Nor is my trust in my partner shaken, nor is my view on the situation changed with the exception of thinking how lucky I am to have such a great guy in my life!

note to self : tell partner he is appreciated today.

 

Wondering what one defines as a feminist as on LS?

 

One who fights for equal rights for women...... no need to be one in your relationship if you feel you are already equal and treated as such.

 

a4a- they should make underoos for adult men

[tanbark813]

Wondering what one defines as a feminist as on LS?

 

One who fights for equal rights for women...... no need to be one in your relationship if you feel you are already equal and treated as such.

 

I agree. However, it sounds like you're superior to your fiance in your relationship, not equal.

 

It's funny how women only oppose any aspect of marriage that doesn't directly benefit them but they don't mind the tradition of the man getting on one knee with a fat, diamond ring and asking for her hand in marriage. Oh no, that tradition is perfectly acceptable.

[loony]

It's funny how women only oppose any aspect of marriage that doesn't directly benefit them but they don't mind the tradition of the man getting on one knee with a fat, diamond ring and asking for her hand in marriage. Oh no, that tradition is perfectly acceptable.

Maybe you could just stop assuming that every woman on this planet wants a freaking diamond engagement ring.

[lindya]

Wondering what one defines as a feminist as on LS?

 

That could be an interesting new thread, but I can foresee it all ending in rage and thread deletion. It does seem that if a woman challenges gender-based assumptions being made about her, then she's liable to be seen as a feminist.

[a4a]

I agree. However, it sounds like you're superior to your fiance in your relationship, not equal.

 

It's funny how women only oppose any aspect of marriage that doesn't directly benefit them but they don't mind the tradition of the man getting on one knee with a fat, diamond ring and asking for her hand in marriage. Oh no, that tradition is perfectly acceptable.

 

 

Tan we are married...... not engaged.

 

ahhh...... wrong again..... like I said I asked him to return a very large and expensive ring. Because it would have been damaged and he spent far far too much money on it. Nor did he get down on one knee and surprise me we discussed marriage as an option and next step to cement our relationship.

He surprised me with the ring while I was watching a movie.

 

Not all women are looking for a fairytale that in the long run will just turn out to be a nightmare. Nor does a man have to buy such an expensive ring, nor does is he forced to propose. I would think only a man without strength would be pressured into such things...... or a man that is looking to use such things as financial gain/gifts to attain a mate as that may be all that they have to offer? IMHO of course.

 

a4a

[Outcast]

Certain women are running the risk of being labeled as feminists, too.

 

Not 'feminists', Loony. Get with the program, willya. It's 'feminazis'. Aren't you a BIG fan of Rush Limbaugh?

 

Oh, and look! Here comes Outcast right on schedule hurling insults

 

There wasn't any insult. How's about you and Alpho take your little 'I Hate Gurlz' club back to the treehouse in the playground?

[loony]

It does seem that if a woman challenges gender-based assumptions being made about her, then she's liable to be seen as a feminist.

I'm not going to congratulate you on the speed of this conclusion, hon.

[tanbark813]

There wasn't any insult. How's about you and Alpho take your little 'I Hate Gurlz' club back to the treehouse in the playground?

 

So many responses come to mind...

 

1. We will when you and loony take your 'I Hate Bois' club back to the mall.

 

2. This just goes to show that if a man has an opinion he is automatically viewed as wrong by women.

 

3. I don't hate girls. I love girls and women. It's bitches that I hate.

 

Which one to choose?

[lindya]

I'm not going to congratulate you on the speed of this conclusion, hon.

 

[Outcast]

It's bitches that I hate.

 

Well gosh, we have a lot in common then because I hate bastards. How cool is that!

[a4a]

Why hasn't any man answered Lindyas post about changing your name to Ralph? hummmmmm?

 

Oh Well.

You know I am amazed at the attitudes here...... not one person told me that they were happy we worked this out. Exception of Sea Change that posted well wishes. Not that I need kudos just an observation.

 

It would seem that some would prefer to bash a happy relationship, state doom will happen, or some how show a sort of jealousy towards a relationship that is going well and is a work in progress. Interesting....... very very interesting indeed.

 

I have to wonder where the this negativity towards another persons relationship would stem from and such hostile feelings about women/men or relationships in general.

 

or is just fun to stir the pot?

 

a4a

[Outcast]

not one person told me that they were happy we worked this out

 

Figured you'd figure that those of us on the 'why take the man's name' side would by default be pleased.

[tanbark813]

You know I am amazed at the attitudes here...... not one person told me that they were happy we worked this out.

 

That's because of your own attitude. You started out your follow-up post with defensiveness and attitude because of the flak you anticipated. It was a self-fulfilling prophecy.

 

So men that feel like a battle in this gender war was lost feel free to post your reaction. However if you call my husband a wimp, puss, ect expect a reply from me. A real man is one that can think beyond his own desire and be caring and compassionate enough to consider his spouses feelings, nor does he worry about being less of a man in the eyes of society becaue some may think differently.

 

You're basically saying that any man who has a different opinion than you is not a real man. Not only is that blatantly false, but it's insulting. Of course you're not going to get much "Hey, glad it worked out!!! :D"

 

Give and ye shall receive.

[loony]

I'm afraid someone has found a new victim in case we have another popularity thread.

 

<Still munching popcorn and laughing her ass off>

[Outcast]

I'm afraid someone has found a new victim in case we have another popularity thread.

 

Nice to not be the only one for a change :p

[alphamale]

this will be my last post on this thread.....but a4a i guarantee you that this issue will come back to haunt you in the future.

 

<Still munching popcorn and laughing her ass off>

well LOONEY, why dont you stick some of that popcorn where the sun don't shine

[tanbark813]

Not to worry, ladies, I can handle more than one of you at a time.

 

[loony]

I'm sure she can take his funny jokes. Must be great not to be such a sissy. Yay!

[High Contrast]

I was going to offer congratulations on what seemed like a nice resolution, but it seemed the discussion had moved on since then to a pure flamewar!

 

I still think it would have been sweeter if both of you had offered to do what the other had wanted. I suppose it was resolved because it turned out that you cared more about keeping your name than he cared about it changing.

 

The Frank analogy works if it's a royal family or something, where the whole society knows and expects the husband's name to change. I'd think most of the traditionalist lads here would do it, wouldn't they?

[a4a]

That's because of your own attitude. You started out your follow-up post with defensiveness and attitude because of the flak you anticipated. It was a self-fulfilling prophecy.

 

 

 

You're basically saying that any man who has a different opinion than you is not a real man. Not only is that blatantly false, but it's insulting. Of course you're not going to get much "Hey, glad it worked out!!! :D"

 

Give and ye shall receive.

 

No I do not think my attitude was geared to oppose flak..... rather a relief that it was not a big deal to my husband at all.... that was the intent. Lost in in the format perhaps.

 

and where the hell do you get this a man with a different opinion is not a real man thing?

 

 

A real man is one that can think beyond his own desire and be caring and compassionate enough to consider his spouses feelings, nor does he worry about being less of a man in the eyes of society becaue some may think differently.

 

The statement says a real man would be considerate of others opinions and feelings, try to see it from another point of view......... and not worry about how others feel about his thoughts or conclusions on the topic as long as it was right for him and those it directly effects.

 

A lesser man would discount others feelings, not consider others opinions, and allow society to dictate how he feels about his beliefs.

 

To the contrary I asked for opinions, why would I bother if I was not going to consider them? Why would I not bring this to light in a conversation with my spouse if I felt that all opinions but my own were wrong?

 

a4a- whats for lunch?

[a4a]

I still think it would have been sweeter if both of you had offered to do what the other had wanted. I suppose it was resolved because it turned out that you cared more about keeping your name than he cared about it changing.

 

QUOTE]

 

Thanks HC....and yep he just did not care very much at all...... no big deal.

I did make the offer...... he said no as he understands it was important to me.

 

I think many are used to having loud debates with SOs ect, fights ect.....

this was a civil and caring discussion. Very enjoyable for both of us. We did laugh and he said we were like some hippie couple.... freedom and individuals ect... it was very good, very productive, and of course led to our clone sex chat on the USS Enterprise ..... see we cannot even stay on topic in marital conversations at home.

 

a4a

[a4a]

this will be my last post on this thread.....but a4a i guarantee you that this issue will come back to haunt you in the future.

 

 

well LOONEY, why dont you stick some of that popcorn where the sun don't shine

 

The holy father of the doomed relationship has spoken....... all bow down and hear the words of the one with such a great track record with relationships.

 

 

a4a

[loony]

The holy father of the doomed relationship has spoken....... all bow down and hear the words of the one with such a great track record with relationships.

That's what I always say.

[High Contrast]

Since his last name hasn't changed, he's been successful so far!