internet dating

[vaman]

What are the rules of internet dating?Why when I ask a woman to meet me for coffee they seem to always say that they have met someone already.I usually ask right away because I hate typing and I would rather meet someone face to face.Am I moving to fast?

[sparkle]

Rule #1 of Internet Dating: Make sure the relationship doesn't stay ONLINE and that you actually spend a majority of the relationship IN PERSON.

 

Rule #2: What makes you think that a person will agree to meet some total stranger off the internet when he asks her for coffee? I know I never would.

 

If you hate typing, get off the internet, go out, and meet someone in person.

 

Otherwise, you'll have to type and start a conversation with them before you plan on meeting at all.

[Been There]

What are the rules of internet dating?Why when I ask a woman to meet me for coffee they seem to always say that they have met someone already.I usually ask right away because I hate typing and I would rather meet someone face to face.Am I moving to fast?

Don't know if there are any "rules"...just some sensible precautions! I know many people who have used this as a means to find and meet people...myself included! As a matter of fact, I met my current boyfriend by responding to a personal ad online, and we've been together for a year now. My sister also met her current husband online. So keep trying!

 

Meanwhile, the approach that has always worked best for me is to send a "RECENT" picture of yourself...and I mean "RECENT"! And be honest about who and what you are. I have found a lot of lonely and even mentally unstable people use the internet to temporarially become someone they are not. It's a great fantasy escape...but these are the ones who will usually refuse to meet face to face after all is said and done.

 

Email a few times. Feel the person out. Don't get too excited. Be patient, remembering you are not the "only" pen pal that person is writing. After writing for a couple of weeks, give that person "your" number. Don't expect them to give you their's. (Being female I was always careful about this). Talk to that person a few times over the phone. You can pick out a lot from someones voice. Letters hide a lot, but "real" conversation should help the two of you determin if you are comfortable enough to take the next step. If your email-phone pal seems to be dragging things out too long (more than a month) than chances are there's a hidden reason why they can't meet you. Cut it off. Move on.

 

Okay, now you've picked a time and place to meet. Make sure its during the day where there are lots of people. This is a VERY important rule for females! Also, make sure you leave a photo of your date, a phone number and name, along with any other information you have about that person with a close friend or relative...someone you "trust." Let them know where you are going and when you are coming back. And don't go anywhere else, or change plans. At least, not the first time out. This way, god forbid, if anything happens, there's something for the police to go on. Don't be so imbarrassed about your on-line dating that you keep things secret. This is the WORSE thing you could do!

 

And finally...I do think its important to also say that I know of a "friend-of-a-friend" who was murdered by someone she met on line. My girlfriend made SURE I heard about it in fear that the same might happen to me. But, after following all the precautions, I can say that my on line meetings have been nothing but positive.

 

Good Luck!