ilovehim20 Posted December 8, 2005 Share Posted December 8, 2005 my boyfriend and i have been together about a year and a half and are deeply in love. we have even talked about getting engaged in a year. problem is i have jealousy issues, which i know sometimes i am overly jealous. like i dont want him having in friends that are girls or anything....but recentyl ( yesterday) he just out of the blue logged into facebook and started messaging all his friends (guys and girls) from highschool...and started writing on their walls stuff , reminiscing with them. he said he wanted to see how they were all doing, and they aer his friends ( even though he hasnt talked to any of them in forever) like four years. i already hate thsi part of his life as he was into drugs, sex , and partying...and this makes it that much worse. we nearly broke up..and now he said its killing him but he thinks what we need is space. i guess he needs it...but i mean am i being totally stupid and should jsut let him do this...and y would he do this suddenly ? things were great, and now this....it hurts...and makes me physically ill. so if anyone can help...please do. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted December 8, 2005 Share Posted December 8, 2005 You should DECIDE to trust him and not feel jealous unless he has given you reasons to not trust him. It's easier to be relaxed and feel secure. If he betrays your trut then you'll suffer. But if you live in fear and insecurity, you'll always suffer and finally you'll lose him. Men make mistakes especially if they feel that they are dealing with a jealous woman. Then they start hiding things from you in order to not upset you; you become suspicious and jealous, the fights start... it's a vicious circle. I've recently experienced the bad side of jealousy (is there any good side anyway?). Link to post Share on other sites
cgm5 Posted December 8, 2005 Share Posted December 8, 2005 Hey ilovehim.... I can sort of relate to part of what you're going through. My boyfriend, like yours, also went through a time at the end of high school and right after were he was into drugs, partying, and slept with a couple of his friends. He's only had three partners other than me and two of them he still sees from time to time. It kills me to think about him being that way and messing around with those people. Fortuneatly he has grown a lot and all of that stuff was way before my time, but it still makes me have pangs of jealousy to think about it...and we've been together for 2+ years and are engaged! I've learned to deal with it though, but it is still a little tough from time to time mainly because I was a virgin when I met him and hate that he had a life before me (I'm being sarcastic...but at times not. LOL) I love him for who he is and he wouldn't be who he was if it wasn't for his past. A good thing in my situation is that he's completely moved on and aside from random get togethers he doesn't look back for even a minute at what his life was like. He's happy to have moved on. In your situation I would say that maybe you guys do need a little break. In my opinion if a person is flirting with the idea of breaking up or needing some space then they probably should take it...abesence makes the heart grow stronger so they say and maybe thats just what you two need. Link to post Share on other sites
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