is the love still there

[trunks mlj]

I have this problem me and my girl we been together for a year and we have a son.This is our first child and i love her deeply but it like when we get in a auguement she goes to her guy friends houseand stay all day until 10-11:oo at night.Then rub things in my face like why is it my friends i be with treat me better than you.It hurt my feeling to bad that i get mad and storm out the room.She always put me down in front of her girlfriendstelling i wish my man can keep a job.The remarks go on and on but i know i did something to cause this i ammit that to her that i made mistakes.Sometime i say thing i dont mean and do things but a job shouldnt get in the way of love? do it!I change my whole life for her to be with her but it like why am im changing if i cant get any support from her?Yes we had our up and downs but i thought you suppost to be there no matter if your doing good or bad.It seems she just gave up on me and i ask her to be pataince with me here respond is i have been patience with you for a year and a half. i just dont know to do what to do please help??

[Buckeyegal]

Sounds as though the two of you jumped head first, eyes closed, into this relationship. Only together a year, and you have a child already? I'm assuming the pregnancy forced you into a living arrangement that you probably wouldn't have made so soon, if there wasn't a child involved. I won't preach to you about birth control, it's a little late for that, but hopefully you've learned something there.

 

Since the two of you probably went from dating to being mommy and daddy living together, there's not much chance that you really knew each other that well. From the sound of it you are both verbally abusive to each other, and both of you run away from dealing with your issues in an adult manner. If you want to save the relationship, you should probably get couples counseling, they can show you ways to deal with stress and anger, give you communication tools, etc.

 

She has problems with you being unable to hold down a job, and while the way she deals with this is immature, she has a legitimate gripe. You're a father now, you need to grow up and be a responsible adult. I'd be ticked too if my husband/boyfriend couldn't keep a job, and I was left to be sole provider for myself, child and lover. Especially if she doesn't have a good paying job, that would be a tremendous amount of stress put upon her. You don't think a job should get in the way of love, but when there's little money to put food on the table, pay the rent, love and respect can go flying right out the window.

[trunks mlj]

Sounds as though the two of you jumped head first, eyes closed, into this relationship. Only together a year, and you have a child already? I'm assuming the pregnancy forced you into a living arrangement that you probably wouldn't have made so soon, if there wasn't a child involved. I won't preach to you about birth control, it's a little late for that, but hopefully you've learned something there. Since the two of you probably went from dating to being mommy and daddy living together, there's not much chance that you really knew each other that well. From the sound of it you are both verbally abusive to each other, and both of you run away from dealing with your issues in an adult manner. If you want to save the relationship, you should probably get couples counseling, they can show you ways to deal with stress and anger, give you communication tools, etc. She has problems with you being unable to hold down a job, and while the way she deals with this is immature, she has a legitimate gripe. You're a father now, you need to grow up and be a responsible adult. I'd be ticked too if my husband/boyfriend couldn't keep a job, and I was left to be sole provider for myself, child and lover. Especially if she doesn't have a good paying job, that would be a tremendous amount of stress put upon her. You don't think a job should get in the way of love, but when there's little money to put food on the table, pay the rent, love and respect can go flying right out the window.

[trunks mlj]

Me and my girl we have a son whos 2 months.We stop or kinda stop talking to one anther cuz of our problem.First of all i didnt have a job cuz i got laid off and for most i lost 2 other jobs.We argue over me getting a job but i dont sit at home and moan.I go and hit the streets to find one but she says my actions tell her that im not giving my all and im bulls***ting all the time.I give it my best shot just because i come home early doesnt mean im not doing anything to get a job.Anyways we made a bet if i didnt get a job by friday ill take my name off the lease i signed it and everything but when i did that she switch up on me.She wanted me out the house cuz i wasnt providing nothing for her.She allways putting me down talking about im not on her level of thinking and im a dissapointment to her.Yes i said i was going to do things to provide but things happen and i couldnt provide right then and there.Everybody telling her to dump me cuz im worthless,etc.I done some wrong to her i wasnt honest with her and she didnt like it but she worry to much to much about me and i wanted her to be happy for a change but not being honest that can ruin any relationship i think thats why we not talking cuzi wasnt honest but i want to change that.I got me a good job i work for the city and i tell her thing will be fine but we went through hell before job and i dont know what to do?We are hanging by a ropei dont want this rope to break!If it does my son will be i the middle and i dont want that i want him to have his mother and father not step you fill me!many times i told her that i can take care of them,but thing just fell to the floor and she dont believe me anymore i guess?I want to show her that i can do this!This time is differnt than the other times i fill the diffenence.Now i work for the city then i was at macys working warehouse big difference.How can i show her that i mean bisness not bulls***tin!please help?Ohh when i got this job she want to see other people cuz of what we been throughbut i havent gave up on this relationship why she giving up on me?Is it because im not honest,job related,or im not the man she wanted i dont know?We been going through it since we move in together and i want this to stop!!Please help!!!!!!!!